Bones

Caroline: I have let a pretty face lead me down the path of unrighteousness. Yours, for example. Booth: Well, it's not like that. Caroline: Of course it is. Watching you two together is like being at prom. But it's not high school now, Booth. It's grown-up time. The beautiful scientist, is fired. She just doesn't know it yet.

(in the past) Booth: Do you believe in fate? Bones: Absolutely not. Ludicrous. (in the present day) Bones: I still don't. Booth: And I still do.

Cam: You fired the Jeffersonian Institution? Booth: (handing Cam a file) Uh, I don't know what any of this stuff means. Yeah, Caroline made me.

Zack: You can take the clothing and leave now! Hodgins: (to Zack) Yeah? You can take that femur and shove it- Brennan: Doctor Hodgins!

(in the past) Brennan: (as Booth leads her out of a conference room by her arm) Let go of me! Booth: (very stern) I will if you would just- (Brennan slaps him across the face) Ow! What the hell?! Brennan: You are a bully! You- you grab my arm just like the judge, you use your badge and your gun to intimidate people! Booth: Really? The way you use your brain to make people around you feel stupid! Brennan: Well you are a stupid man! I hate you! Booth: Oh, you hate me? What are you ten years old? I'm not your dad! Brennan: I will never work with you again! Booth: Who asked you?! (Brennan storms off)

(in the past) Brennan: I find I'm annoyed with you. Booth: Why because I fired you and hired you back? It's the Federal Government. Brennan: No, because you got me drunk to fire me and then have sex with me. Booth: Whoa, no. I got myself drunk so I could fire you and you decided not to have sex with me which I accepted, gracefully. So, you regretting that decision? Brennan: No, I'm not. It was a very good decision. I stand by it. Booth: What's going on, Bones? Brennan: Do not call me 'Bones'.

Sweets: You kissed? Booth: Yes. Brennan: There was tongue contact. Sweets: (frustrated, falling back into his chair) My book is crap!

(in the past) Booth: I have a gambling problem. But I'm dealing with it. Brennan: Why did you feel you had to tell me that? Booth: You know, I just feel like, um ... this is going somewhere. Brennan: Why did you feel like this is going somewhere? Booth: Uh, I just, I feel like I'm gonna kiss you. (they kiss)

(in the past) Booth: I got something to confess. Brennan: Well, is it the fact that you're a direct descendant of John Wilkes Booth? I already know that. Booth: Wait- wait a second, how do you know that? Brennan: From your bone structure. Booth: Ju- just keep that, um, under your hat, okay? For now, all right? Brennan: (chuckles) Okay.

(in the past) Zack: (about to get hit by a baseball bat) Why are you the deliverer of the blow while I am the recipient? Hodgins: Because you grunted when you picked up the bat.

(in the past) Bones: Even though my time and expertise are extremely valuable I ... accept your decision to test my abilities. Obviously, I passed with a lot of color. Booth: Pardon me? Bones: It means I did very well. Booth: Oh, right. You, um ... flying colors. You- you passed with flying colors. Bones: Yes, I know.

(in the past) Bones: Can I come in and watch you broil the suspect? Booth: Yeah well you know, I could broil but I think you mean grill.

(in the past) Bones: Are you seeing anyone? Booth: Wow, right to the point there, huh Bones? Um, casually, but she doesn't really like my hours. You? Bones: Well a, physicist has been asking me out. So I was, thinking of saying yes. Booth: I'd ask you out if I could. Bones: Why can't you? Booth: Well, FBI rules again. No fraternizing with other agents or consultants. Bones: That's too bad. Booth: Glad you think so.

(in the past) Booth: You really need to learn how to speak to human beings. Bones: I speak six languages. Two of which you've never even heard of. Booth: You know what? You're a cold fish. Bones: You're a superstitious moron. Booth: Get a soul! Bones: Get a brain!

Brennan: (after telling Booth she can't be in a relationship with him) Can we still work together? Booth: (pauses) Yeah. Brennan: Thank you. Booth: But I gotta move on. You know, I gotta find someone who's, who's gonna love me in ... thirty years, or forty or fifty. Brennan: I know. (They walk off together, and Brennan puts her head on Booth's shoulder.)

Booth: J- just give it [us] a chance, that's all I'm asking! Brennan: No, you said it yourself: the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome! Booth: Well then let's go for a different outcome here, all right? Let's just, hear me out alright? You know when you talk to older couples who, have been in love for thirty or forty or fifty years alright? It's always the guy who says "I knew." ... I knew, right from the beginning. Brennan: Your evidence is anecdotal. Booth: I'm that guy. Bones, I'm that guy, I know. Brennan: (crying) I- I am not a gambler. I'm a scientist. I can't change. I don't know how ... I don't know how.

(in the past) Brennan: We got fired. Hodgins: A 56 Bel Air- Brennan: What? Angela: What? Hodgins: What? Angela: You got fired? Wh- is this because you slept with Booth? Brennan: What, I didn't sleep with Booth, why- why did you say that? Hodgins: Tequila vapors. Zack: (clueless) What is happening? Brennan: I got us fired because I, punched a judge in the schnoz.

Booth: Look, I want to give this a shot. Brennan: You mean us? No, the FBI won't let us work together as a couple- Booth: Don't do that, that is no reason ... (kisses Brennan) Brennan: (pushing Booth away) No! No! Booth: Why? Why? Brennan: You- you thought you were protecting me, but you're the one who needs protecting. Booth: Protecting? From what? Brennan: From me. I ... I don't have your kind of open heart.

(in the past) Angela: Wow, this place is huge! Brennan: Angela, this is my assistant Zack Addy. Zack, this is my friend Angela Montenegro. Angela: Hey, it's Jimmy Neutron, huh? Boy scientist? Zack: I don't know what that means. Brennan: Neither do I.

(in the past) Booth: I gotta tell ya, I really am enjoying working with you Bones. Brennan: Bones is not my name. Booth: It's just a nickname. Brennan: Oh, yes, I see. I could call you Shoes. Booth: Shoes? Why Shoes? Brennan: Yes because they are, so very shiny.

(in the past) Hodgins: What are you doing? Zack: We are identifying a murder victim. Hodgins: From this century? (Brennan nods) Hodgins: I'm taking the clothing. Brennan: Dr. Hodgins, I have asked you before not to be so unpleasant. Hodgins: Please? I'm taking the clothing. Zack: Why? You are a botanist. Hodgins: Yeah, and a mineralogist and an entomologist. Which gives me the same numbers of doctorates as the two of you put together ... because you don't have any!

(in the past) Booth: Forensics don't solve crimes. Cops do. Cam: Same activity, same results. (Booth turns around to leave) Speaking of which, you look like you've been up all night? Booth: I'm fine. Cam: Meaning you won?