Bones

Zach: My parents felt that singing lessons would help integrate me socially. Hodgins: Really? Zach: Yes. I was quite good. I received acclaim and a new stature amongst the parents of my peers. Hodgins: What about your actual peers? Zach: My mother said they were jealous and not to worry about it.

Brennan: ... you are a superb agent. Booth: You think? Brennan: Yeah, of course. Since I am the best in my field, it would be self-destructive for me to work with someone who's beneath me. Booth: Oh, okay ... well, that's good, 'cause, you know, I have to be honest here. Sometimes I think you feel that you're better than me. Brennan: Well, objectively I'm more intelligent ... Booth: There we go ... Brennan: ... in certain areas, and in others I understand my limitations and I admire your expertise. Booth: Oh. You admire me? Brennan: In certain areas of expertise. Booth: Well, I admire your expertise. You know, the whole science thing. Brennan: Thank you. I'm an author too. Booth: I know. Brennan: Best-selling, that also gives me an elevated status. Booth: Here goes the ego. Brennan: No, I'm not saying that society's correct to elevate me, I'm not saying that I deserve the elevation, I'm just saying that it occurs. Society should elevate scholars and teachers, not actors and athletes. Booth: Yeah, what about cops? Brennan: Yeah, they're very important.

Pam: If he didn't love me, why would he give me this bracelet? P-A-M, do you know what that spells? Booth: ... Pam. Pam: That's right.

Adam Matthews: Then about a month ago, she showed up in the middle of the night, and started banging on the door. Booth: Oh, was she angry? Adam Matthews: She was wearing a teddy, and high heels. So I'm thinking angry wasn't her emotion. Brennan: You're implying she was sexually stimulated. Booth: So were they um ... ? (claps his hands) You know. Did they ... ? (claps again) Brennan: Did they have sexual intercourse? Adam Matthews: If they did it was through a locked door. Brennan: So ... no? Booth: (clapping) Very good, Bones. Okay, let's go.

Bones: So he was killed, decapitated, and mulched. Wow, can't be worse for this guy.

Booth: (about the people at the gym) These people here are just trying to be healthy, Bones. Bones: There is a fine line between health and vanity.

Bones: How does a former sniper have a grass allergy? Wouldn't a sneeze give away your position? Booth: Bones, okay, I worked in the desert. Sand, no grass.

Bones: The guitar string could definitely be the murder weapon. Booth: Cause it cut the cheese?

Bones: Does Tommy share your affection? Pam: Why do you ask it like that? Because I don't look like a scarecrow? (to Booth) Like her? Bones: Hey. Wha- what are you coming after me for? (to Booth) Do- do I look like a scarecrow?

Brennan: Until I was thirteen I wanted to be the next Cyndi Lauper. Booth: I'd say you're kidding but I don't think you know how to kid. Brennan: The other girls and I referred to her as rad. (laughs) My mother said I sang just as well. Booth: As well as Cyndi Lauper? Brennan: Yes. Sweets: Mothers do that. It's healthy. Brennan: No it wasn't just flattery. My mother told me I sang "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" better than she did. (Booth Laughs) Sweets: It was an expression of affection Dr. Brennan. Not an objective evaluation of your abilities. Brennan: Well, I think you're wrong. Booth: Okay then, go ahead, belt it out. Brennan: No! Sweets: Yeah, come on give us a few bars. Booth: Come on ... Brennan: I can't just burst into song. I have to have music and an appropriate atmosphere of frivolity. Booth: Diva, forensic genius, best-selling author, better than Cyndi Lauper ...

Brennan: (watching an amateur sing) This guy is good. Booth: Thank you Paula ... just focus here.

Brennan: Well Dr. Sweets still thinks she's the killer. Sweets: Dangerous. I think she's dangerous. Booth: I agree. Sweets: Thank you Agent Booth. Booth: All those gifts, and taking pictures from a distance and showing up in the middle of the night in a nightie is all very dangerous.

Sweets: She has body issues, which are not congruent with her actual appearance. She's someone who's slightly large, who believes she's a very large woman who can convince people she's only slightly large. And the way they treat her convinces her that she's right. Bones: That's interesting. Sweets: See, you're only pretending it's interesting. It means very little to you. Bones: That's true.

Sweets: Mocking will not change my opinion. I have been mocked many, many times before. (Booth and Bones exchange a look) Sweets: That came out wrong.

Booth: Everybody thinks they're the next Kelly Clarkson. Bones: Who's Kelly Clarkson? Booth: American Idol ... "Because of You"? Bones: Because of me?

Bones: Hey! Break down the door! Booth: It hurts my shoulder when I break down the door!

Zack: My regimen is easily completed in my apartment. Treadmill for 30 minutes, 100 sit-ups, push-ups and leg-lifts, and then 20 minutes of free weights. I'm deceptively strong. Cam: I am deceived!