Bones

Booth: (to Dr. Kostov) You touch her, she'll break your arm.

Bones: (entering her own office and noticing Booth is sitting at her desk) I need a receptionist. I can't have just anybody waltzing in here.

Brennan: You're ordering a prostitute from my cell phone?! Booth: I'm wondering if Rachel ever took part in one of those two-on-one specials? Hodgins: Hey! The old two-on-one special! Classic! Zack: What's a classic? Booth: That's great. Just send me whoever she worked with the most. Brennan: You're ordering a hooker to my hotel?! Zack: Did I hear you say hooker? Hodgins: Hey, how come I never get to go on these out of town trips? Booth: You have much looser daily allowances than I do. Brennan: Well, have fun.

Zack: (to Hodgins) Why are you being so mean to Dr. Goodman? Hodgins: I'm not being mean, I'm being critical of his process. Zack: Why are you being so critical of his process? Hodgins: We should be looking at the facts. Is the skeleton authentic, or not? That's all. Instead it's all a mish mash of conjecture. What I think is he's forgotten how to do the science and doesn't want to admit it.

Hodgins: (yelling) I knew this was gonna happen! Angela: Hodgins... Goodman: (to Hodgins) Because we have been colleagues on this, more than superior and subordinate, I have allowed you to be insubordinate but I warn you, Dr. Hodgins, that is over. Hodgins: Do you want my letter of resignation?

Booth: Take a look at this. Brennan: A bunch of red circles? Booth: Each circle shows where a body part was found. Brennan: What is this, an airport? Booth: Los Angeles International. Local pathologist says the remains are in pretty bad shape. Brennan: So they punt it to the FBI. Booth: Airports, they fall under federal jurisdiction... excellent use of the word punt. Brennan: I can't go to Los Angeles, I have an Iron Age warrior to authenticate. Booth: Iron age warrior? Ok, when was the Iron Age? Brennan: 1500 years ago. Booth: Fresh body bits just a little bit more urgent. Brennan: You do realize that there are a lot more fresh bodies than there are perfect specimens from the Iron Age? Booth: When you say things like that it's just to bug me, right?

Booth: I'd like to go pay a visit to Dr. Boobies.

Dr. Goodman: I am an archaeologist. This is what we do. We step outside the facts and tell ourselves the story of an individual or a culture. And if the story I tell myself about this man, who lived fifteen hundred years ago, is true. If he was laid to rest by people who respect and loved him. Don't I owe it to them not to let the pure scientists desecrate his remains? Hodgins: Or you could be totally rational and say you were waiting for imaging technology to improve to the point where it wasn't necessary to disassemble him. Dr. Goodman: Ah, yes. I suppose I could say that. It's less uh- Hodgins: Sentimental - for the pure scientists.

Brennan: Every culture nurtures ideals of beauty toward which people strive - fine! But in the future, people will look back upon the ... surgical alterations of the nose or breasts or buttocks with the same horror that we regard the binding of feet or the use of bronze coils to extend the neck. Booth: You wanna speak up? 'Cause it's really hard to hear every word in this very, very quiet waiting room. Brennan: It's barbaric! It's painful! It's wrong! This murder victim may never be identified because some glorified barber with a medical degree had the arrogance to think that he could do better than millennia of evolution.

Dr. Kostov: (about Rachel) I made her beautiful. Brennan: You mean you took what was unique and particular about her and destroyed it.

(Booth is talking with this prostitute about Rachel) Booth: (to the security guard, who has come to chase them) Listen buddy, I don't know what your problem is but this is my little sister. Okay, I'm visiting from Coeur D'Alene. I asked her here for a drink which is taking a hell of a long time by the way.

Hodgins: Science is no country for story tellers.

Angela: Okay Bren, you're being a little edgy and tart with me and all I'm trying to do is tell you the truth. Brennan: What this young woman did to herself, it's as if she completely removed her own identity. Who hates herself so much that she not only changes her looks but her core architecture? If we don't know who she is, then how will we be able to catch the person who murdered her? Angela: Is that your way of apologizing? Brennan: Yes, Angela. Angela: I accept. Love your guts, sweetie.

Brennan: This car doesn't feel very FBI-ey. Booth: Hey, Bones, this is a 1966 Mustang. It's a classic. What goes better than that with the FBI? Brennan: Then how come on the rental agreement under model, you made the guy write 'sedan'?

Zack: You know one thing... Angela: What's that? Zack: She's going to be beautiful. Why would anyone go through all this pain and not end up beautiful? Angela: Do the names Michael Jackson or Joan Rivers mean anything to you? Zack: One of them. The other I'll look up.

Brennan: (Holding a photo of the victim before any surgeries) Look at her. Booth: Yeah. Pretty little thing.

Zack: The murder weapon is a larger version of the surgical implement used on the victim's jaw. Brennan: You compared the wounds to the marks left on her jaw? That's brilliant, Zack. Zack: It was Hodgins; well Hodgins quoting you, so it was us. Go team!

Brennan: These bones you bring me; I give them a face, I say their names out loud, I return them to their loved ones, and you arrest the bad guy. I like that. Booth: So do I. Brennan: I feel like we should be arresting these "doctors" because whether they killed her or not, they still erased her. Booth: Well, maybe I can hold Cullen off for a day. Brennan: That's not good enough. Booth: You're welcome.

Brennan: We are born unique. Our experiences mold and change us. We become someone, all of us, and to have that taken away by murder to be erased from existence against our will, it's just... Booth: Evil? Brennan: Unacceptable.

Brennan: We know we're looking for someone who grew up in New England, moved here about eight years ago, her leg was crushed in a car accident when she was thirteen, she was on a boat shortly before she was murdered. We know some of her names and some of her faces. Booth: That's all your stuff. Usually by now we know more about my stuff. Brennan: We have separate stuff? Booth: Yeah, by now I usually have a feel for the person, what they wanted, how they felt, what was going on in their lives. With this girl, nothing. Brennan: She thought she was ugly. She did everything she could to make herself beautiful. And all she did was make herself more invisible. Booth: Everybody in this city thinks they're ugly, and nobody is. I'm starting to get why you hate anonymous death so much.

Zack: This is the type of situation where people say, "Oh my God". Hodgins: Pretend you're a person and say it. Zack: Oh my God.

Zack: What's with Goodman and Hodgins? Angela: They're guys. They should just lay them out on the table and measure. Zack: Lay what out on the table and measure? Angela: Ok. Awkward moment.

Brennan: You know, I'd like to drive sometime. Booth: (Changing the subject) Look, our contact out here is Special Agent Tricia Finn. Brennan: I'm an excellent driver. Booth: Ok, Rainman. Brennan: I don't know what that means. Booth: I'm always gonna drive, you know that, right? Me behind the wheel and you over there on the grandma side. Brennan: I'm not above telling Deputy Director Cullen what kind of car you rented. (In the next shot we see Brennan with a big smile behind the wheel and Booth less than happy in the passenger seat)

Brennan: X-rays, pictures; we're going to do this without touching the actual skeleton as much as possible. Zack: Kid gloves? Brennan: Latex should be alright... Zack were you being metaphorical? Zack: I decided to give it a shot... which is also metaphorical.