Cory: Well, we won't be fighting for long. I've got something that'll take the fight right out of Mom. Read it and weep, Little Big Hair.
Topanga: (Reading Cory's paper) "My model wife won't care how dirty my room gets. She'll always let me win at video games. She'll play street hockey any time of the day or night." Why don't you just marry Shawn?
Cory: Because our kids would look like horses.
Minkus: It's not a scam.
Eric: Yeah. Listen to Minkus, boys. He's the smart one.
Minkus: I too, was discovered at the mall.
Eric (slaps his head): D'oh!
Cory (discussing Ward Cleaver): I guess it's easy to sound smart when you got the best writers in Hollywood writing everything you say.
Mr. Feeny: I wouldn't know.
This is the first appearance of Eric's best friend, Jason (Jason Marsden).