-
Willy: We got new rules here. No killing!
-
Buffy: This is the Initiative, Xander. Military guys and scientists do NOT make out with each other.
Xander: Well, maybe that's what's wrong with the world. Ever think about that?
-
Willy: Look, if they see me dealing with you, then I'm just the same old Willy, working both sides of the street.
Buffy: I'm gonna have to punch you, aren't I?
Willy: Just once, and it doesn't have to hurt. Just make it look good. (draws her fist back) Ow! Oh!
Buffy: Not yet - I haven't touched you!
-
Anya: You know, you really should get yourself a boring boyfriend. Like Xander. You can't have Xander.
Buffy: That was the idea. Riley was supposed to be Mr. Joe Guy. We were gonna do dumb things, like hold hands through the daisies, going "tra-la-la."
Willow: Poor Buffy. Your life resists all things average.
Anya: So dump him. But you can't have Xander.
Buffy: I'll try and remember that.
-
Willow: Well, look who's cranky-bear in the morning.
Giles: Yes, I can't imagine why I didn't sleep well in my beach ball.
Anya: Every time you moved, it made squeaky noises. It was irritating.
Giles: Really? I'm surprised you could hear it over your Wagnerian snoring.
-
Buffy: (while watching a cartoon) That would never happen.
Willow: Well, no, Buff, that's why they call them cartoons, not documentaries.
-
Buffy: (to Riley) Maggie tried to kill me.
Anya: It didn't work, but they're all upset, anyway.
-
Buffy: Xander, what about your basement? The guys haven't seen us together that much, and there's enough room.
Willow: Ooh, plus, mirror ball.
Xander: Cool. Come on down and boogie at Xander's hideaway.
Anya: Yes. Come boogie.
Giles: Absolutely not. I will not squat in that dank hole.
Spike: What, it was good enough for me, but you're above it all?
Giles: Precisely.
-
Buffy: So Maggie sends me down to the sewers, with one of those blasto-guns, and the next thing I know, it's raining monsters.
Xander: Hallelujah.
-
Xander: (upon seeing the Initiative for the first time) Holy Moly!
Buffy: I know...
Xander: I totally get it now. Can I have sex with Riley too?
-
Xander: Storm the Initiative? Yeah, let's take on those suckers!
Buffy: I was thinking more that we'd hide.
Xander: Oh thank God.
-
Buffy: Giles, Anya — you keep researching. Xander, you and I are going undercover.
Anya: Hey! Remember before? No Xander. Not in a boyfriend way; not in a lead-him-to-certain-death way.
Buffy: Xander's the only one with military training.
Anya: It's not like he was in the 'Nam. He was G.I. Joe for one night.