One of Buffy's funniest episodes. full of humor though a little pointless. The good thing was that Dawn tried to prove her love by killing herself, thereby we learn a lesson to not give our live for love. It's a very fun episode to watch.
9.5
"Superb"
Him
What's so good about this episode is that it shows us how dangerous a crush is and a love spell. It's a very funny episode and specially for Anya, she didn't have a big role in it but what she had was hilarious. it's a very good comedy episode.
cut to Buffy taking Spike to Xander and he's staying over there but Buffy is still freaked out with him but she makes him stay there no matter what. cut to Dawn and Buffy in school talking about love and Spike and Buffy says she knows he changed and that's why she's helping but Dawn doesn't see why people bother after what happened to Xander and Anya and stuff. she doesn't get love and Buffy goes away and then Dawn sees a guy and she falls in love and then falls from her seat.
the credits start
cut to Anya and Buffy talking because Anya was almost being killed. and she says that Willow and Dawn aren't good for helping but she can. cut to Dawn in school she goes to RJ and his friends and she begins to talk about a teacher. and then they talk about the new tryouts and Dawn begins to talk about nothing and they totally ignore her and leave. cut to Dawn finding cheerleader outfit. next day she has to perform with that old outfit. and she makes herself look stupid and falls on the ground. and they think she's dumb.
cut to Buffy outside and Dawn is crying and Buffy says she noticed. Dawn says she blew it and cut her dress up. she goes to cry on her bed and Buffy and Xander go to her room. Dawn is ad and she says she saw his soul and that she doesn't know what real love is and tells her to go. cut to Dawn on school and a guy tells RJ he's taking over and that upsets Dawn who goes after that guy and she says it isn't fair and he doesn't care so she pushes him off the stairs. cut to Dawn on Robin's office. and she says she didn't do it and is sorry but Buffy noticed what Dawn did. cu to Dawn outside and she sees RJ and she says some stupid things to him. and RJ knows what she did and they make a date.
cut to The Bronze. and Buffy, Xander and Willow talking on a table and they see RJ and see that he's with a slag and they like her and then they see it's Dawn. Buffy is very mad and when Dawn takes a brake Buffy tells her to go home but Dawn doesn't want to and Buffy says that if Joyce was there and she tells Dawn to go home and she says she doesn't care how she looks and that she's inlove with RJ and goes away. On an alley someone is waiting and it's his chick and they are mad and have a catfight but Buffy stops them and the girl tells Dawn to stay away and walks away. cut to school next day and Robin is mad at RJ and then Buffy talks to him and he says he doesn't mean to hurt the girls and Buffy begins to fall inlove with him too and she says she has a sexual experience and he knows what she means and walks away with his jacket and she falls madly inlove.
cut to Dawn coming home and Buffy wants to talk to her. she says that she talked to RJ and that he likes her. she says that she likes him and the that there was something he didn’t like and that was that she came on too strong. she tells her to lay back and he likes the be the sweeper and Dawn is very happy with her sister. cut to RJ in class and Buffy comes in and she wants RJ and he comes with her and they go to a room and they have sex over there. and he wishes someone would get rid off Robin. cut to Dawn looking for RJ and then she looks in that room and sees them having sex and gets all upset and goes crying where Xander finds her and she tells him and that she never wants to see Buffy and RJ again and Xander goes to the class and he finds them having sex and tells Buffy to get off and that they're going home.
cut to Dawn crying and Buffy telling her to stop and that he's inlove with her and the guys tell them that it's a spell and Buffy makes Dawn upset and Dawn says that she trusted Buffy and that's why she isn't suppose to do that and goes to her room. cut to them looking for a picture and Xander remembers the time with him and his spell and then they find out who's the brother so Xander knows him and is going to him. cut to Xander and Spike going to the brother and he looks very weird. and he talks about stuff and that his brother was a geek until he started to ware his jacket. and then they want to go and leave him because he wants to play a game and they don't want to.
cut to RJ coming to he house and Anya and Willow tell him to go away and when he does they fall inlove and then they start to fight about who loves him the most and they are gonna prove their way and Buffy tells Dawn she's never gonna get him. cut to Willow going to do the spell that turns him into a girl and Buffy going to kill the principal and Anya to rob a bank and Dawn is going to kill herself by a train. cut to them arriving and stop Willow but she doesn't have much time cause the others are gonna prove their love. Buffy is going to kill Wood so they are going to start there. cut to Robin and Buffy is outside with a bazooka but Spike stops her and they run away and Willow is doing a spell to find Dawn. cut to them arriving and Buffy sees Dawn and she jumps on a train and is able to save Dawn and Dawn was gonna do that cause in that way he'll know that there was someone who loved him so much. but Buffy says no guy is worth her life and that they are under a spell.
cut to Xander and Spike going to attack RJ and they take off his jacket. cut to the house where they burne jacket. Dawn says she feels stupid but Buffy tells her to get ready to feel stupid when it really happens. then they ask what Anya did and she doesn't tell and then on the radio that a thief is still free and she said she wrote a poem 'who wants ice-cream. my threat?'
Black Out
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Best episode quotes:
Xander: You're gonna live in that small room over there. I know it looks like a closet, but it's a room now. You're not gonna touch my food. I take the first shower in the morning, and if I use up all the hot water, that's your tough noogies. And I hate this plan. Are you keeping up, or do you need some kind of English-to-ConstantPainInMyAss translation?
Buffy: Invitation.
Xander: Is there something more emphatic than hate? Can I revile the plan? Fine. I invite you in. Nimrod.
Spike: Don't want your soddin' food anyway.
Xander: I just don't understand when his problems became your problems more specifically mine.
Buffy: The school basement is making him crazy. We can't just leave him there.
Xander: Why not? Crazy-Basement-Guy is better than Stalking-Buffy-Guy.
Spike looks down, ashamed.
Dawn: It's true. You guys aren't... You're not starting up again with the whole
Buffy: No. A thousand gallons of no. OK, it's just things are different now he has a soul.
Xander: I'm sure that'll be a real comfort when he soulfully attacks you again.
Dawn: Yeah, what does that mean exactly that Spike is all soul-having?
Buffy: I don't know, but he's been through a lot, OK, and nobody's attacking
Spike: Buffy Sorry.
Buffy: No, it's me. I-I just
Spike: I'll go. This can't work.
Buffy: It will. I-it already is. OK, you know, you've been out of the basement for half an hour, and you've already stopped talking to invisible people.
Spike: Bollocks.
Buffy: OK, so there was that one episode in the car, but
Spike: No, bollocks to the whole thing. I don't need your mollycoddling.
Buffy: It's not coddling. Now go to your closet.
Dawn: So, what is it?
Buffy: What's what?
Dawn: Last night, you said you weren't helping Spike out of pity. What is it?
Buffy: It's a good question.
Dawn: Is sitting there drinking soda some kind of a Zen non-answer?
Buffy: No, I just... I don't know what I'm feeling. I think I can't stand him, but sometimes...
Dawn: You love him?
Buffy: No. I I feel for him.
Dawn: Feel what, exactly?
Buffy: Dawn...
Dawn: No, I'm I'm just trying to understand. I mean, none of it makes sense. First you say Spike disgusts you, but secretly you two are doing it like bunnies. And then Spike says he'd die for you, but he tries to rape you.
Buffy: For the record, Spike knew how wrong it was. That's why he went away.
Dawn: But to get a soul? Like that would make him a better man? Xander had a soul when he stood Anya up at the altar. And now he says he still wants her? I just don't think it's the school basement that's making people crazy.
Buffy: I should really get back. You comin' with?
Dawn: I just don't see why people bother. I mean, you put all this energy into chasing and having and brooding and I just don't understand these relationships where you all do insane things.
Buffy: Bye, rant girl.
Dawn: Well, you could, like, paint a beautiful mural on every ugly wall in the world, and then you could paint a beautiful mural on every ugly mural in the world.
Anya: Maybe I'm not even the right Anyanka. Ever think about that? There's tons of Anyanka's out there. Maybe one of them pissed off this, uh what did you say his name was? D'Hoffryneffer...
Buffy: Good thing I stopped by and heard screaming. So, I guess D'Hoffryn decided to take you out after all?
Anya: Yeah. He's, uh, not head of vengeance for nothing. Well, thank you for the generous life-saving. Now please go away. Look, I don't need anyone's help. Or, OK, clearly I do, but I don't want to need anyone's help, so stop helping.
Buffy: I get it. After last week, you feel you need to be all renegade and broody. Taking yourself out of the loop
Anya: I need to figure out who I am.
Buffy: Another, something bad is happening. I don't want my friends out there alone right now, OK?
Anya: Well, I-I guess you guys could use my help. Willow's not very good with the practical strategizing except when she's evil. And Dawn she's not really good for anything.
Buffy: Come on, Dawnie. Come out. Dawn, sweetheart, it's not that bad.
Dawn: How would you even know? R.J.'s never gonna notice me now.
Buffy: From what you said, I'm sure he already noticed you, I mean with the falling and the spirit. Spirit. They said you were spirited, right?
Dawn: Go away!
Buffy: Dawn...
Xander: Things are a lot better, I see.
Buffy: I don't think tonight's gonna be good for videos, Xand.
Xander: Right, with the wailing and the crying... Still better than a cozy evening with Spike. Shall I order a pizza? Don't teens in a snit like pizza?
Dawn: It is not a snit! I-I finally met him they guy of my dreams, OK and I blew it. R.J. hates me now.
On the bathroom floor, Buffy sees her cheerleading outfit, shredded.
Buffy: Dawn, what is that?
Dawn: Just the end of my life.
Xander: Remember when she used to have a crush on me? I miss the much cuter "me" crush.
Buffy: You shredded my outfit.
Dawn: I'll buy you a new one.
Buffy: That's not the point. I don't want a new cheerleading outfit.
Xander: Now, now, let's not be hasty. Not the right time.
Buffy: Dawn, I'm sorry that you feel so bad. OK, but in the morning this won't seem so terrible. You don't even know this R.J. Not really.
Dawn: I do know him. I know his soul.
Buffy: Really? Dawn, he wasn't even on your radar yesterday.
Xander: It's the jacket. It's true. Something about the big letter on the chest makes girls get all swoony and crushy. I saw it all the time in school. And you couldn't just pin any old felt letter to your coat and get play not that I tried.
Dawn: It isn't a crush. It's love. I love R.J.
Buffy: Again, since yesterday. Dawn, it's awfully fast.
Dawn: What? You're telling me I don't feel what I feel?
Buffy: No, of course not. I believe that you think it's real. It seems real... to you.
Dawn: You know what? Maybe I don't want advice from the Dysfunction Queen. You have no idea how I feel. You have no idea what real love is. Maybe if you did, you wouldn't make fun of me this way.
Buffy: Dawn, I'm not making fun of you.
Dawn: Just go. Leave me alone.
RJ: Summers! Hey.
Dawn: Hi.
RJ: I heard Wood hauled you into his office.
Dawn: Well, yeah.
RJ: About O'Donnell?
Dawn: Yes.
RJ: That sucks, facing the whole inquisition thing.
Dawn: Yeah. "No one expects the Spanish Inquisition." God, it's like I have a disease or something. It was really no big deal.
RJ: No. It was. I think it's cool that you faced him. Wood.
Dawn: We just talked. He just wanted me to tell him about... the accident.
RJ: Yeah. It sucks when these things just happen out of nowhere.
Dawn: Right. Out of nowhere.
RJ: You know, I was thinking of heading out tonight, after practice. You want to meet up?
Dawn: Uh... hmm
Xander: Well, Spike definitely seems a little more cogent, less bl-bl-bl-bl-bl. I'm just saying... once you get back the soul, doesn't that mean you start, like, picking up your own wet towels off the floor?
Willow: No, but maybe you start to feel really bad about leaving them there.
Buffy: At least he's showering, and that's a refreshing and delightful change.
Xander: Buff.
Buffy: I think that's the guy.
Willow: What guy?
Buffy: The one who, according to Dawn, is the quote smartest, funniest, coolest, hottest, and having the thickest boy eyelashes boy in school unquote.
Xander: He don't seem so tough.
Willow: Check out the fan club.
Xander: Daddy like.
Buffy: What is that shirt made of? Paint?
Willow: Buff
Buffy: Glad Dawnie isn't here to see her precious boyfriend getting all thrusty with some slut-bag hussy. Oh.
Xander: Oh. Oh! No! "Daddy" No, I wasn't When I was looking, I wasn't Oh, God!
Willow: Right there with ya.
Buffy: So, do you have plans later, or are you just gonna go down to the docks and wait for the fleet to come in?
Dawn: What?
Buffy: Where do I start with the bad? First, you told me you were going to the library. Second, you do not go out on a date without informing me first. Third, Anna Nicole Smith makes you look tacky.
Dawn: Yeah, well I think I look hot, and so does R.J.
Buffy: Oh, I bet he does. Maybe I should go have a little word with him.
Dawn: No! Don't you dare embarrass me in front of him.
Buffy: I don't like this. This boy has you acting crazy.
Dawn: It's my life. I'll do what I want to.
Buffy: I don't think so.
Dawn: Oh. So, what suddenly you're Mom now?
Buffy: No, I'm not. And I am glad she's not here to see you like this. Look, I'm sorry. I just
Dawn: You just can't handle it.
Buffy: What?
Dawn: You've always been the special one. Hot little Buffy with her boyfriends. The Slayer. And now someone likes me, and you just can't stand that I'm getting the attention.
Buffy: That is the farthest thing from true.
Dawn: No it's not. And I'm sorry, but I like the way R.J. makes me feel, and if you think that makes me a slut or whatever, I don't care.
Buffy: Oh, no, no, no. You are not going back out on that dance floor.
Dawn: Oh, my God! I'm the pushy queen of slut town.
Buffy: I've always been fascinated by football. So, what's it like to lead a team?
RJ: The thing of it is: the time. Nobody gets how much time goes into it, with practices and games.
Buffy: I totally get it. I was kinda juggling some stuff when I was in high school, too which was also very recent. Principal Snyder was always on me.
RJ: I still say Wood's the worst. You haven't seen the way that guy rides me. I wish somebody'd get him off my back.
Buffy: Yeah, that would be cool.
RJ: And sometimes, I didn't even do anything wrong. You're like a teacher.
Buffy: Not really. But, I mean, does it bother you?
RJ: Not so much.
Buffy: Dawn, please stop crying. Please? Crying isn't going to make his love for me go away, you know.
Pan out to show Xander, Anya, and Willow are standing there, staring at Buffy and Dawn.
Xander: Listen, you're under a love spell. That's what this has to be.
Buffy: You're right. He's right. You're under a spell. Oh, poor little Dawnie.
Willow: But we're working on it. It'll be better soon.
Anya: Yes. Soon neither one of you will be in love with this boy.
Buffy: He's not a boy.
Dawn: What do you know about our love? It's true and real. This isn't magic. This is my heart.
Anya: Fine.
Xander: We'll be working.
Willow: Look, I know this feels terrible, but it isn't real. Try to hold onto that.
Buffy: Did you hear that? It isn't real. You're just crazy.
Dawn: It is so real! I love him. You knew how I felt like I finally found something, and you betrayed me.
Buffy: I betrayed you? You're the one that constructed this elaborate fantasy about you and my lover.
Dawn: Your lover? You're lover!
Willow: Guys Guys
Buffy: I tried to get you to back away.
Dawn: That's right! You lied to me!
Buffy: Did you want me to tell you that he's in love with me? That your little crush is hopeless?
Dawn: It's not a crush! Stop. You're not supposed to do this.
Buffy: Why? Because he's younger than me? You know, I'm extremely youthful. And peppy.
Dawn: No, because you were the one I trusted.
Willow: Damn love spell. I have tried every anti-love spell spell I could find.
Anya: Even if you find the right one, the guy would probably just do an anti-anti-love spell spell... spell.
Willow: What? I'll get it. Maybe it's Xander with some answers from the brother. Oh, you have to be
RJ: I was looking for Buffy. Miss Summers.
Willow: Buffy's not here. Go away!
RJ: Are you sure?
Anya: No Buffy for you. Leave quickly now.
Willow: But you don't even know him!
Anya: Yes, I do. I looked into him and saw his soul.
Willow: He was walking away, so unless his soul was in his ass
Anya: A.J. is my best friend and my dearest darling
Willow: It's R.J. And what you were picking up on was his deep caring and devotion to me.
Dawn: What's going on?
Anya: Willow thinks she's in love with my boyfriend, R.J.
Dawn: What? No! You two can't do this.
Buffy: Willow, you're a gay woman and he isn't.
Willow: This isn't about his physical presence. It's about his heart.
Anya: His physical presence has a penis!
Willow: I can work around it!
Dawn: This isn't fair! How can you all be doing this to me?
Buffy: OK, wait. Everyone wait. Just calm down, OK? I-I think I know what this is. Clearly, you've both been affected by the same love spell that got Dawn.
Dawn: Uh! This isn't a spell. He owns my heart.
Buffy: Dawn, be quiet. We're trying to work this out. We don't need you interfering.
Willow: There's a simple answer to this. Just think about who loves him the most. Clearly I do, since I'm willing to look past the whole orientation thing.
Dawn: I need him.
Anya: Well, you're gonna have to do better than that I'd kill for him.
Willow: You'd kill for a chocolate bar.
Buffy: No. Yes! Kill for him. I'm the slayer. Slayer means kill. Oh, I'll kill the principal.
Anya: Ooh, that is hard to top.
Willow: Yeah, well I have skills. I can prove my love with magic.
Anya: Yeah, right. What're you gonna do use magic to make him into a girl? Damn. Ooh, I know what he'll like.
Buffy: Sorry, Dawnie. You're never gonna get him.
Dawn: No. Never.
Willow: Oh, Hecate, I call on you. I humbly ask your will be done. Hear my request, a simple change, create a daughter from a s- Oh, man! Now I've gotta start all over. Hecate hates that.
Xander: What the hell are you doing?
Willow: Proving I love R.J. the most!
Xander: Will, honey... R.J.'s a guy.
Willow: I did notice that, yeah. 'S why I'm doing my spell, 'cause, you know, he doesn't have to be. Now, hand me back my crystals. I don't have much time.
Xander: Much time before what?
Willow: Before Buffy and Anya and Dawn have a chance to prove that they love R.J. the most.
Xander: And how are they gonna do that, exactly?
Willow: Well, Buffy's gonna kill Principal Wood, Any
Xander: Fine, OK, let's start there.
Buffy: What were you doing? I mean, what is this?
Dawn: It doesn't matter.
Buffy: This is the plan? You're gonna steal R.J. by being trisected?!
Dawn: What am I gonna compete with you? You're older and hotter and have sex that's rough and kill people. I don't have any of that stuff. But if I did this then his whole life he'd know there was someone that loved him so much they'd give up their life.
Buffy: Dawn...
Dawn: And it would be true forever.
Buffy: No guy is worth your life not ever.
Dawn: R.J. is. And don't say he isn't. Look what you were willing to do.
Buffy: Dawn, I would give him to you in a second if I could. That's how much you're scaring me.
Dawn: But I- I thought you wanted him... for you.
Buffy: Nah. Well, yeah. My God, that boy is hot. Sorry. I think I might be under a spell here.
Dawn: I hear ya.
Xander: That, my friends, is the smell of sweet, sweet, victory.
Anya: Also, burning cotton-poly blend.
Buffy: Xander, be honest. You didn't, you know, think about slipping that jacket on just a little bit?
Xander: I refuse to answer that on the grounds that it didn't fit.
Anya: Man, this tool gets his jacket from his brother, who got it from their father, and we'll never know where he got it. That bites.
Xander: Yeah, welcome to the hellmouth, where even outerwear isn't safe.
Willow: I can't believe I almost
Buffy: I can't believe I almost
Anya: It was a spell. You were helpless. We're not responsible for anything we did morally or, you know, legally...
Xander: True. You fell for a mystical, ancient curse. Who hasn't made that mistake seven, eight times?
Buffy: You hear that? Not your fault.
Dawn: I'm just so... the way I acted, the way I talked to you. I feel so stupid. All over a spell.
Buffy: Get ready to feel even stupider when it's not.
Willow: Hey, Anya, you never told us what you can't believe you almost.
Anya: Almost who, now?
Willow: No, you can't be the only not embarrassed one. What did you do?
Anya: I, uh, wrote a poem. An epic poem... comparing him to a daisy and a tower and a lake.
Radio: And now the latest on Sunnydale's late-night bandit who is still at large. A masked thief held up a number of large businesses
Anya: OK, great, ice cream. My treat.
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Story: 9
Acting: 10
Writing: 10
Picture: 10
Gripping: 9
My Rank: 9
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Total: 9.5