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Anya: Alternate realities are neat.
Xander: You know what I'll always remember?
Riley: The swimsuit calendar's sticking in my mind... Not in a good way.
-
Riley: These spells... these really work? I mean, can you really "turn your enemies inside out"? Or... learn to "excrete gold coins"?
Anya: That one's not so much fun.
Willow: They work Riley but they take concentration. Being attuned with the forces of the universe.
Xander: Right you can't just go 'librum incendere' and expect...
(The book page bursts into flame, and Xander slaps it shut to put out the fire)
Giles: Xander, don't speak Latin in front of the books.
-
Buffy: Shut up, Spike.
Spike: Ooh, semi-harsh language from Betty.
-
Buffy: Well, I was just kind of wondering if maybe anyone else thought that Jonathan was kind of too perfect?
Xander: No, he's not. He's just perfect enough. He crushed the bones of the Master, he blew up a big snake made out of Mayor, and he coached the US Women's soccer team to a stunning World Cup victory.
-
Buffy: (about Jonathan) He starred in The Matrix but he never left town. And how did he graduate from med school? He's only 18 years old.
Xander: Effective time management?
-
Buffy: Anya, when you were a demon, you granted wishes, right?
Anya: Vengeance wishes, on ex-boyfriends. I'd wish he was a dog, or ugly, or in love with President McKinley, or something.
Buffy: But someone could wish the whole earth to be different, right? That's possible?
Anya: Sure, alternate realities. You could have, like, a world without shrimp. Or with, you know, nothing but shrimp. You could even make, like, a freaky world where Jonathan's like, some kind of not-perfect mouth-breather, if that's what's blowing up your skirt these days. Just don't ask me to live there.
-
Anya: Xander's not here.
Buffy: Oh.
Anya: (pause) You're not going away. Why aren't you going away?
Buffy: Well, I was kind of hoping to look at some of Xander's stuff.
Anya: Oh. sure. Come on in, make yourself at home. And so on... (realises Buffy is still there) Oh, you're still here? That's nice.
-
Riley: Buffy I want you to know.
Buffy: Do we have to have the talk? No talk, more dance.
Riley: I just want to say I'm sorry. That's it's only you that I want.
Buffy: I know. I know all of that.
Riley: You do? Since when?
Buffy: Since you put your arms around me.
-
Buffy: (about Riley sleeping with Faith) There's no way he could know. I mean, you don't just look at someone and say, "Hey, that's not your body. Get out of that body with your hands up!"
-
Buffy: It's all Faith's fault. She's like poison. No, worse, she's like acid that eats through everything. Maybe she's a bomb.
-
Willow: (to Tara) I know she's not over the whole Riley sleeping with Faith thing. You know what I mean - Faith's insides in Buffy's outsides, when her insides were out.
-
Xander: We knocked 'em dead. Which they already were.
Willow: We knocked 'em deader.
Anya: Well, they weren't very well organized. If they'd all rushed at Buffy, they could have killed her right away.
Buffy: Thanks, Anya. That won't keep me awake all night.
-
Giles: I can't find a reference to any rituals. Seems more like a... family meal, if you will.
Buffy: And they say no one eats without the TV on any more.
-
Buffy: A nest. No biggie. I bet I could do it. I mean, I know I could take at least two.
Anya: Yes. And then we could run for help while the other three suck your heart out through your neck.
-
Willow: (confused) Buffy was right. (trying again) Buffy was right.
Anya: It doesn't sound very likely, does it?
-
Buffy: (to Spike) It's Buffy! You big, bleached... stupid guy!
-
Xander: So we're saying he did a spell just to make us think he was cool?
Giles: Yes.
Xander: That is so cool!