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Forrest: I've always been Riley's second-in-command. Instead he picks a girl.
Graham: His girl.
Forrest: Whatever. Three guesses on what that boy's thinking with.
-
Buffy: Anya seems a bit edgy.
Willow: She's a little antsy around commando-types. Ex-demon issues.
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Riley: Hope you don't mind us tagging along.
Willow: No, no, of course not. The more, the... more.
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Anya: Xander, you haven't been paying any attention to me tonight. Just peddling those processed food bricks. I don't know why.
Xander: Well, let me put it in a way you'll understand. Sell bars, make money, take Anya nice places, buy pretty things.
Anya: That does make sense. All right, I support you. Go sell more.
-
Willow: I've been trying to find a dolcite crystal my entire life. Well, since June, anyway.
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Maggie: I've assembled some reading material to bring you up to speed.
Buffy: Oh. And I thought I was never going to get homework from you again.
Maggie: You can't take that home. That's classified material. Highly sensitive. When you're through reading those pages you'll have to eat them.
Riley: She's joking.
Maggie: Don't worry - doesn't happen very often.
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Buffy: Tell me about your night.
Willow: Well, spent most of it at Xander's, teaching Anya to play poker.
Buffy: That sounds like fun.
Willow: Yeah. Except the Anya part, and the poker part.
-
Walsh: So. All right. Fine. If she wants a fight, we'll give her one. Won't we, Adam? I've worked too long. Too long...to let some little bitch threaten this project. Threaten me. She has no idea who she's dealing with. Once she's gone, Riley will come around. He'll understand.
-
Buffy: Professor Walsh. That simple little recon you sent me on... wasn't a raccoon. Turns out it was me trapped in the sewers with a faulty weapon and two of your pet demons. If you think that's enough to kill me, you really don't know what a Slayer is. Trust me when I say you're gonna find out.
-
Giles: It doesn't appear to be a bullet. It's too deeply embedded to be a tranquilizer dart.
Spike: Also not tranquil.
Giles: Some sort of...illumination emanating from it. It's blinking.
Spike: I don't care if it's playing "Rockin' the Casbah" on the bloody Jew's harp, just get it out of me!
-
Spike: Look! The buggers shot me. In the back.
Giles: Remind me. Why should I help you?
Spike: Because you do that. You're the goody-good guys. You're the bloody freaking cavalry.
-
Giles: How is this our concern? Seeing as how you've expressed the desire to have nothing more to do with us.
Xander: Spike said that?
Giles: Mm-hmm.
Xander: ...That hurts.
-
Giles: Very well. Hmm, maple walnut.
Xander: An excellent choice.
Giles: Please leave my home now.
Xander: It's the, uh, the gritty texture, isn't it? Maybe you're more
a cherry-berry fellow.
-
Xander: W-- try one! Check these flavors. Cherry-berry. Maple
walnut. Ooo, almond licorice.
Anya: Ew.
Xander: Anya, we don't say 'ew' in front of potential customers.
Anya: Just skip this part and tell him you want money to buy me pretty
things. He'll understand.
-
Walsh: We've made significant advances in reconditioning the sub-terrestrials. Bringing them to a point where they no longer pose a threat.
Buffy: So I've seen... on the Discovery Channel. With gorillas and sharks. They-they made them all nice. You haven't seen it?
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Riley: I don't like to brag.
Buffy: I had no idea. This is incredible. But not that I thought it was some fly-by-night operation. Unless it is! I mean, can you guys fly? At night. With those jet-pack things, do you have those?
-
Spike: Hey! Wipe your feet when you enter a person's home.
Giles: Oh, yes. Careless of me. Tracking mud all over your, uh...mud.
-
Walsh: It took the patrol team 42 minutes to track you and you neutralized them in 28 seconds.
Buffy: I was just lucky.
Walsh: I see. Well...still. Very impressive.
Buffy: I was just being modest with the whole 'lucky' thing. You got that, right?
-
Willow: Everyone is getting spanked but me.
-
Willow: I implore you, Neisa, blessed goddess of chance and fortune, heed my call. Send to me the heart I desire.
Xander: You know, magic at the poker table qualifies as cheating.
Willow: That wasn't magic. I was praying. Two please.
-
Willow: Guess she's out with Riley. You know how it is with a spanking new boyfriend.
Anya: Yes, we've enjoyed spanking.
-
Xander: You are looking at the new local distributor for Boost Bars. 'The natural food bar that provides a nutritional energy boost for active, health-conscience people.' Want one?
Willow: No. Thanks. Those things usually taste . . kind of tasteless. And then leave a bad after-tastelessness.