Buffy the Vampire Slayer

The Good;
Good scenes between Buffy and Dawn, excellent battle between Willow and Glory

The Bad;
If you're a Tara fan it's pretty gut-wrenching

Best line;
Minion; "Begging your pardon and begging in general"

Women good/men bad;
Glory calls Tara a tramp

Jeez!;
Glory brainsucking Tara is awful although Clare Kramer gives a great performance describing the madness (which of course Glory experiences it too). Anya's racism against the French is also a bit much (and surely Anya is actually Swedish, yah?). Willow spits on Glory.

Kinky dinky;
Glory bathes in front of her minions but blindfolds them.

Captain Subtext;
Tara and Willow have their first fight. A lot of people disliked this but couples fight, straight or gay, everyone has arguments. Willow refers to lesbo-street cred, she tells Tara that she's the only woman she's fallen in love with (again, bi rather than gay?). Implying that Tara has had gay lovers before? Anya offers to let Willow sleep with her admitting this sounds a lot more lesbian than she intended. Glory gives lots of little hints of lesbianism when she's 'holding' Tara's hand. Lovely scene at the end where Buffy and Willow are with 'their girls', Will kissing Tara and Buffy stroking Dawn's hair.

Guantanamo Bay;
Giles tortures Glory's minion. With the same trick Angelus played on him?

Scoobies to the ER;
Poor Tara, brainsucked.

Apocalypses; 5, Glory asks did anyone order one?

Scoobies in bondage:
Buffy: 8
Giles: 4
Cordy: 5
Will: 3
Jenny: 1
Angel: 4
Oz: 1
Faith: 3
Joyce: 1
Wes: 1
Xander; 1
Dawn; 1

Scoobies knocked out:
Buffy: 16
Giles: 10
Cordy: 6
Xander: 8
Will: 5
Jenny: 2
Angel: 6
Oz: 3
Faith: 1
Joyce: 3
Wes: 1
Anya;1

Kills:
Buffy: 96 vamps, 32 demons, 6 monsters, 3 humans, 1 werewolf, 1 spirit warrior & a robot
Giles: 5 vamps, 1 demon
Cordy: 3 vamps, a demon
Will: 6 vamps
Angel: 3 vamps, 1 demon, 1 human
Oz: 3 vamps, 1 zombie
Faith: 16 vamps, 5 demons, 3 humans
Xander: 5 vamps, 2 zombies, a demon, a demon
Anya: 1vamp + a demon
Riley; 18 vamps + 7 demons
Buffybot; 1 vamp
Spike; 1 vamp and 1/2 a demon

Scoobies go evil:
Giles: 1
Cordy: 1
Will: 2
Jenny: 1
Angel: 1
Oz: 1
Joyce: 1
Xander: 3

Alternate scoobies:
Buffy: 6
Giles: 3
Cordy: 1
Will: 2
Jenny: 2
Angel: 3
Oz: 2
Joyce: 2
Xander: 3

Recurring characters killed: 10
Jesse, Flutie, Jenny, Kendra, Larry, Snyder, Professor Walsh, Forrest, McNamara, Joyce

Sunnydale deaths;
89;

Total number of scoobies: 6
Giles, Xander, Willow, Buffy, Anya, Tara,

Xander demon magnet: 5(6?)
Preying Mantis Lady, Inca Mummy Girl, Drusilla, VampWillow, Anya (arguably Buffy & Faith with their demon essences?), Dracula?

Scoobies shot:
Giles: 2
Angel: 3
Oz: 4
Riley; 1

Notches on Scooby bedpost:
Giles: 2; Joyce & Olivia, possibly Jenny and 3xDraccy babes?
Cordy: 1?
Buffy: 3 confirmed; Angel, Parker,Riley, 1 possible, Dracula(?)
Angel: 1;Buffy
Joyce: 1;Giles, 2 possible, Ted and Dracula(?)
Oz: 3; Groupie, Willow & Verucca
Faith:2 ;Xander, Riley
Xander: 2; Faith, Anya
Willow: 2;Oz and Tara
Riley; 3; Buffy, Sandy and unnamed vampwhore

Questions and observations;
You feel so bad for Buffy having to quit school and so bad for Ben being fired. Glory likes aspects of this dimension, changing her tune (because of Ben's influence?). The scenes with Buffy and Dawn over Dawn's truancy are heartrending, the terror they feel at the prospect of losing each other. Can't Dawn go to Aunt Arlene? Once again Tara says she fears Will's magic. Buffy's 'Things change' line may be from Batman Returns? What do people want petrified hamsters for?
Marks out of 10; 7/10

Tough Love was perfect episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and one of my favorites to watch. This episode was very entertaining as Buffy has to deal with Dawn and start putting her foot down, and Glory is closer to finding the Key. Buffy's situation with Dawn and school is a relatable experience for some viewers. Willow and Tara have their first quarrel and when Tara goes off by herself she encounters Glory. Leaving Tara insane Glory continues her search while Willow decides to take matters into her own hands. Willow fighting Glory was one of my favorite scenes. Emotions ran high all over this episode, which added to its complexity. In the end Glory discovers the true Key, and I can't wait to watch what happens next!!!!!

Buffy tries to control Dawn after learning that she hasn't been going to school and that she can be taken away. Meanwhile, Buffy also drops out of college for the semester, and Glory thinks that Tara is the Key.



I liked this episode! Definitely a good episode, for sure. Buffy looked good in this episode, and I like how she's civil with Spike now. I liked how Glory went after Tara, and Willow went after Glory. I loved seeing Willow and Glory fight. Then Buffy once again saved her at the last minute. Haha. Buffy made Glory laugh. I liked how they fought and then Buffy ran out with Willow. Amazing episode. Can't wait for the rest of the season. :)

Wow! Season Five has been a corker so far and this episode is no exception. Alyson Hannigan is on fine form, but so is Amber Benson and Clare Kramer.

There is a lot of foreshadowing in this episode - Tara and Willow fight about Willow's growing power (something that happens in season six); something terrible happens to Tara (something that happens in season six) and Willow goes bonkers over it (something that happens in season six also). Its good to see someone actually hurting Glory, even if its is temporarily. The ending is quite touching, but the nice talking is interrupted by Glory and the revelation that little Dawnie is the Key. Thats bad.

Like 'New Moon Rising' and 'Family', 'Tough Love' is another lovely Willow and Tara episode with very powerful performances by Amber Benson, Alyson Hannigan and Michelle Tratchenberg. After sending her minions to spy on Buffy's friends, Glory mistakens Tara for The Key and after a confrontation sucks her brain out like there's no tomorrow. A lot of important things happen in 'Tough Love', a very good episode. Buffy deals with the responsibility she has over Dawn, Willow and Tara fight for the first time, Glory finally discovers that Dawn is The Key and Willow goes all Dark Willow due to what happens to Tara, foreshadowing some of the events of Season 6.



There's not much I don't like here and Season 5 proves once again to be one of the best seasons of Buffy. Besides all the dark stuff going on, we still get plenty of funny moments like classic Anya lines about capitalism and Willow singing "Go school, it's your birthday". Overall a great episode that succeeds in building up tension to the final episodes of the season.

Buffy is dealing with being Dawn's legal guardian and Tara and Willow are dealing with some relationship issues. In a way I feel like I had the same questions Tara had about Willow and her sexual orientation: is just college experimentation she wasn't aware of, confusion, or is it as real as Tara's feelings? While I like the Willow being gay storyline, it seems like her sexual orientation issues should have been hinted at earlier in the series (season 1 or 2) instead of season 4, where it feels like it was introduced suddenly.



My all time favorite scenes in this episode, as many others pointed out, are Tara standing her ground at the park against Glory and an enraged dark magic powered Willow going after Glory. Best kick butt effects and action sequence all around; most especially because we rarely get to see some our Scooby sidekicks do some actual kicking in the behind and because it's one of the first times you see Glory taking some major damage (however little damage it proves to be).



And as always, some great Dawn/Spike scenes (him making her realize she's not evil) and an exciting closing scene furthering the season arch soon closing into our finale...

Tough Love-While Buffy tries to control a motherless Dawn and bring their lives back to some sort of normalcy, Tara is captured by Glory who is desperately trying to find the Key.



Well, here is when the season kicks back into high gear as Glory starts making her final moves to get the key and the Scooby gang find themselves under serious pressure. First, Buffy has to deal with being Dawn's legal guardian and trying to be the responsible grown up with out her mom there to support her. The development that Dawn might be takin' away is a serious moment played well by both actresses as Buffy and Dawn might lose each other. You really do feel bad for Buffy and the burden she has to carry with her now that her and her sister are now on their own.



But at the heart of the episode is Tara and Willow, who both experience their first fight. It's a heartbreaking scene as Tara reveals that she's not sure of Willow's devotion to her or even if her new sexual orientation is real. Not to mention, Glory attacking Tara was a tense scene, especially with Glory breaking Tara's hand and blood pouring from it. Glory sucking out Tara's brain as Willow gets there too late is incredibly sad as Willow never got the chance to tell Tara how sorry she was. Willow going all "blair witch" on Glory has to be the best moment all season. A forshadowing og her "Dark Willow" persona in late Season 6, Willow shows just how powerful she is becoming and the fight brings some stunning effects. The episode ends with an edge of your seat cliffhanger as Glory returns to round 2 and Tara reveals that Dawn is the Key by mistake. All and All, "Tough Love" is a great episode that gets the ball rolling for the last few episodes of the season.

This episode focuses on two major relationships in the Buffy canon... that of Buffy and Dawn and the other being Willow and Tara. Glory has ordered her minions to keep an eye on the Gang in order to find who is 'new' among them, having failed to find her Key during her abduction of Spike.



Or so we're led to believe... in actuality, Glory already has a target chosen. The Scab-crew are actually just making sure that the Slayer and friends aren't going to intervene again.



In the meantime, Buffy is having problems stepping into the role of Dawn's parent-figure. First, by being too unaware of what Dawn is doing... or not doing; i.e. going to school. This comes to a screeching halt after Buffy finds out that Dawn has been playing skipping classes a lot. And when Buffy tries to point out to the principal that things have been hard since Joyce's death, she shoots down the excuse. Buffy ends up being told that if she can't control Dawn and make her attend school, they'll have to call social services to see if she should be removed from the home.



Unfortunately, instead of being straight with Dawn about this news, Buffy goes overboard in the discipline department. She even shoots down Willow's attempts to help Dawn with schoolwork when it looks to her like they are goofing around more than actually working.



Both Michelle and Sarah do good jobs with the domestic drama as they try to find an accommodation to a household without Joyce. And they're fights over school and Buffy's overbearing parenting style leads to another domestic fight... this one with Tara and Willow.



I always find this argument awkwardly written. What starts out as a fight over Willow's magical growth and Tara's insecurity about her own weaker magics somehow mutate into a question of whether Tara will continue to have a place in Willow's life. Willow turns this argument away from her magic use (which she tends to be irresponsible and flippant about) and onto her lesbianism, accusing Tara of thinking that Will is just experimenting before heading back to "Boy's Town". Instead of getting the argument back on track, Tara replies, "Should I?"



I think this speaks to Tara's general insecurities and feelings of inadequacy. When we remember "Family" its not hard to see why she's full of self-doubt.



Unfortunately, the fight ends before the two can talk things out when Willow huffs out of the room and to the Magic Box, while Tara goes to a Cultural Fair happening on campus.



And this is where Glory finds her. The scene with Glory and Tara is well written, especially Tara's sense of helplessness in not being able to call for help, because she knows that Glory will kill anyone who interferes. Glory even makes the point to her, letting her know that anyone she kills will all be Tara's fault. So Tara stays silent even as Glory crushes her hand, drawing blood.



Clare is genuinely chilling after she finds out that Tara is not her Key, after all and asks her who it is. When Tara remains silent (except for expressions of pain), Glory describes what being brain-sucked will feel like to Tara and its pretty creepy. But Tara again refuses to say anything, remaining defiant despite her fear. By this time, Giles has captured the minion that was spying on the Magic Box and Willow learns that Glory is after Tara. She arrives at the park just in time to see Tara looking dazed and confused and breaks down in tears.



But the highlight of the episode comes afterward when Willow pulls out the magical stops and takes on Glory. For a few minutes, Willow is powerful and menacing and the entire scene is breathtaking. But all too soon, she weakens again and Glory is barely phased by it all. Buffy arrives in the nick of time to get Willow out of there, but its not over...



Glory comes breaking through Tara's dorm room wall and poor crazy Tara reveals that Dawn is the much-sought after Key!



It's an exciting, tense and heartbreaking episode and leads us toward the wind up of the season.

This is the end of Buffy's education as she drops out of the semester, and, eventually out of college. We see what she's given up for both her slayer and family responsibilities as we meet a nice lecturer who's as sorry to see Buffy go as she is. Buffy is still teetering on the edge of adulthood, on one hand she sees Dawn, 6 years younger than herself, as "just a kid"; on the other, she asks Giles, the nearest thing she has to a parent, to do the parenting: "You're so much more grown up than me". When he refuses, she goes overboard on "being mom" to Dawn and shows the severity of someone new to parenting, forgetting how when Joyce and Giles were too hard on her, she went to a party and almost got eaten by a snake monster. She is more about the tough than the love.



Ben can relate to Buffy – he also has a secret life and he is also forced to give up what matters to him because of his sister - he is sacked by the hospital. He wasn't able to be there to save lives because of Glory's desire to take them. Talking of jobs, the writers have a little bit of fun at Emma Caulfield's expense as they have her character explain that to be part of American society means to be part of capitalism. Her British boss meanwhile shows less interest in money and more in unseen ruthless violence as he does something unknown to one of Glory's minion, hinting towards his deed at the end of the series; we've seen the end of bumbling Giles. He is also less apprehensive about his teenage friends' emotions, as he tries to comfort Willow concerning her argument with Tara: "It's not the end of the world," he tells her, forgetting that to use this phrase is not a good idea when you live on a hellmouth. Willow wants Tara to be on her side regarding her disagreement with Buffy over Dawn's schooling, but we know that moral centre Tara will not be. The row accelerates into Tara's fear of Willow's power and Willow's insecurities about Tara being closer to Buffy because they've both lost a loved one. The traditional witchcraft/lesbian metaphor is once again raised as Willow takes Tara's uncertainty about Willow's magical strength to be uncertainty about Willow's sexuality; this probably says more about Willow than Tara. There are, again, hints of Season 6 to come - Willow: "What is it about me that you don't trust?" Tara: "I don't know where you're heading".



Whilst Buffy is coping with the loss of her mother and her university life, along with her commitments, she forgets that Dawn is also dealing with Joyce's death and school and being a teenager at the same time as being the Key. These last two issues are linked– adolescents think the world revolves around them, but in this case it does – Glory's use of the Key will change the world. Dawn knows that she is the cause of Spike's injuries and Tara's mental state and like all teenagers, she wants to find herself, know about herself: "I must be something so horrible to cause so much pain and evil". As Buffy must move away from teenagehood into adulthood, Dawn must move away from childhood into adolescence. Even as Spike, the voice of reason, tells her: I'm evil and I'm alright," she still thinks: "I don't think I can be good" – the adolescent's realisation that she is not innocent, that she is capable of being bad.



Willow is someone who knows that she is capable of being bad and it's not just white hot anger, it's black-eyed pre-meditated rage as well. Talking to Buffy, she pretends to calm down before going to find Glory. Her anger with Buffy comes with her earlier resentment with Buffy not listening to her and not admitting her power whether it is at Maths or witchcraft. "When is the time? When you feel like it?" asks Willow of Buffy. She believes that she is a match for Glory even if Buffy isn't – Tara is right to be worried about Willow's power and lust for it and again, Willow's S6 reaction to grief and loss is hinted at.



Fortunately, Spike is there to point out to Buffy that Willow will not forget that Glory has invaded Tara; Buffy realises that Spike is right and she listens to him – they are starting to become friends.



Willow joins the Lost a Loved One gang and her tough love is caring for a vastly changed Tara. Willow does this without a thought, she proves her love even though it is too late. After the aborted fight, we settle down to an emotional scene as Willow tells Tara: "You're my always" and Buffy, sitting close with Dawn, understands that we take care of the ones we love, no matter what. Unfortunately, there is a coda.



Willow invaded Glory's space by taking the fight to her, here the Goddess literally invades Willow's by pulling down the walls of her dorm room. The minions have got the key's identity wrong time and time again but now they get a bit of luck. Glory couldn't threaten the secret out of Tara, but ironically in her altered state, she inadvertently gives it away: "Such pure green energy!" she says of Dawn. Glory has won again.

This was one crazy episode. There was so much going on, between Willow and Tara, and with Glory and her search for the key. We got to see Buffy start to take responsibility for Dawn too, which was something that she really needed to do. It was amusing to see her beg Giles to be the bad guy though.



Glory realizing her mistake with Tara and sucking her brains was scary. The way Willow went after that was just amazing and so incredibly dark. Willow and Tara were great when they were talking. They were so calm while they were arguing, which made the argument so much greater. I loved Tara and how she thought she was saying everything wrong. Willow was great in that scene too. I loved that you really got to see where the pair stood, and that they finally got some deep things out to the surface.



I loved that Spike had to tell Buffy that she didn’t calm Willow down. It was obvious that Willow wasn’t going to listen to Buffy when someone she loved so much had gotten hurt. The argument that willow and Buffy had helped in making everything seem so much more real.



It was so sad at the end with Tara and Glory finding out that Dawn was the key.

The episode starts slowly with Buffy getting that Dawn was her responsibility. Tara and Willow fight. Then things starts to happen. Glory gets who the newbie in the group is; Tara. Since Tara and Willow have been fighting Tara is alone in the fair. Glory comes and gets that she is not the key and sucks her brains out. This is one of the most painfull episodes because of Taras and Willows pain. You can also see that the plan is to strip Buffy and her friends of all good things in their lifes. So much has happened since the beginning of the season. At the end Glory realises that Dawn is the key. The end is nearing..

Tough Love



This episode starts pretty slow and is not that well acted for a big of the time. but when Glory feeds of Tara's brains is something really important and from then on goes this episode better and better. and this is specially good for Tara because she becomes finally a better character. specially after this. and Glory finally gets to know about Dawn.



cut to Buffy going to a professor. she has to drop all of her classes. then cut to Ben going to work but he's fired because he hasn't been there for over two weeks. he's mad because Glory is ruining his life and later on he changes into her again.



the credits start



cut to Glory in bath while her minions serve her. she is mad at them and wants them to find the key this time. cut to school, a woman says that Dawn needs to put effort in and she hasn't been going to school. the woman tells Dawn to leave the room. cut to the magic shop. Anya is annoyed by costumers than don't buy things. it's un-American. she goes to them and then Buffy and Dawn arrive. Buffy needs to speak with Giles and leaves Dawn with Willow and Xander. Buffy talks to Giles and she has to be more discipline-y to Dawn. she comes out and Dawn is playing with the gang and she gets all upset and is mad and wants to take Dawn. Willow says not to be mad and if she wants to go with them to a party but Buffy says no. she doesn't have a life but she has Dawn's.



cut to Glory and her minions. They think they know who it is and it's time to collect the key. cut to Tara and Willow. They are talking about Buffy and Dawn but they both say a different thing. then Tara slips and says that Willow is frightening her. they both get upset and Tara things that Willow will be into boys again. Willow doesn't want to go with Tara anymore and juat leaves. cut to Buffy and Dawn at home. Dawn doesn't want to listen or to study but Buffy gets upset and says that they will take her away if she can't get her go to school. She will go to her father or a foster care. Dawn asks why she didn't tell her before. Buffy says she did now.



cut to Tara in the play, then someone grabs her hand and Tara looks and it's Glory. cut to the magic shop. Willow is sad about the fight but Giles says that the fight is over. then he grabs a minion who was listening and makes him talk. he says that Glory went to find the key, he says the witch and because she is new the one and Tara gets scared and she goes looking. cut to Glory with Tara. she brakes her hand and there comes blood out. she licks it and discovers that she isn't they key but a worthless human. she says that Tara has to tell her who the key is or she will suck her brains out. and make her crazy but Tara won't tell her, cut to Willow coming closer and seeing while Glory sucks Tara's brains out and then disappears. Willow finds Tara and she's crazy and Willow cries and is sorry.



cut to the hospital. Tara has a broken hand and Willow is still very sad. Tara is her everything. then comes Buffy and she's so sorry. cut to Dawn and Spike. Dawn tells Spike that everything that is happening is because of her. she must be something real horrible to cause so much pain. Dawn says that everyone around is suffering. Spike says that it's not true. cut to crazy Tara in the hospital. she has to stay for one day and Willow doesn't want that she needs to make Glory pay but Buffy tells her not to. Glory is to strong. Willow says okay and she wants to be left alone. cut to the magic shop. she goes to the big dangerous magic books.



cut to Glory's place. she liked Tara's brains. then comes Willow to fight Glory and to punish her. cut to the cave. Buffy tells Dawn and that Willow wanted to go but she cooled her off. Spike says that she really believes Willow listened. Dawn says that what if she was it. and Buffy goes away. cut back. Willow tries to ruin Glory but she doesn't care and hits Willow away. then Glory grabs Willow and says that she is going to crucify her but Buffy arrives and they have a neat fight. They slow Glory down and Buffy takes Willow away. cut to Willow, Tara, Dawn and Buffy later. they are feeding each other and Willow is going to take care of Tara. then suddenly glory arrives and crashes the place. Tara panics and sees Dawn. she says that she is a pure green energy and beautiful and they all realise that Glory now knows.



black out



----------

Best episode quotes:



Professor Lillian: I'm glad you like poetry, Buffy.

Buffy: I wish I had time for it. But I just don't right now.

Professor Lillian: Well, maybe short poems.

Buffy: Like those Japanese ones that... um, sound like a sneeze?

Professor Lillian: Haiku?



Doctor: Benjamin. This is a pleasant surprise.

Ben: I'm sorry I'm late.

Doctor: You're not late.

Ben: But sir-

Doctor: You can't be late to a job that you don't have. Interestingly enough, I've decided to give your job to someone who'll actually do it. Honest to God, Ben! I've been calling you for two weeks. Where the hell have you been? I didn't wanna ... I'm sorry to fire you, but I need somebody I can count on.

Ben: I haven't been here... I haven't been here in two weeks. There's an explanation for this. Which ... I ... can't exactly give you. I - can I just tell you it's not my fault?

Doctor: Sure. You can also tell me that the dog ate your homework, or maybe eating Twinkies made you do it, or ... maybe yeah, that there's really a wicked demonic creature living inside you that takes control of your body and forces you to do its bidding.



Ben: No. No. Not here. Not now. Please. I'm Ben. I'm Ben! I'm Ben, I'm Ben, I'm Ben, I'm Ben, I'm Ben, I'm Ben!

Glory: I'm hungry!



Glory: We got this part right, that's for sure. Lot of sucky things in this dimension -- bubble baths? Not one of 'em. Know what I mean?

Jinx: I am in thunderous agreement, oh glittering, glistening Glorificus.

Glory: I wasn't talking to you.

Murk: Uh, begging your pardon, and begging in general, but ... were you talking to me?

Glory: Eww. Yeah, right. Like any of you have ever bathed, anyway.

Murk: Oh, but we do, your scrumptiousness. We bathe in your splendiforous radiance, your aromatic-

Glory: How about you shut up and listen to me, you disgusting little fools? Okay. Now, I asked for the key, and you brought me a vampire. A pulseless, impure, follicly-fried vampire. Loofah! So, what I think we have here is a failure for you to do your frickin' jobs, pardon my French. Mimosa. Mmm ...Vitamins. So I think you better rack your little minion brains, and tell me everything that you saw when you were spying on Buffy and her wacky pals. Everything. Mm. Then I'll figure out who the key is.



Buffy: You lied to me?

Dwn: I didn't lie... exactly...

Buffy: Oh, really? What about all those times I asked you how school was and you said, "Fine"?

Dawn: Well, it was! You didn't ask if I was in it when it was fine...



Xander: Honey. Old saying: A watched customer never buys.

Anya: They would if they were patriotic!

Xander: O.k., I'm going in. "Patriotic"?

Anya: Yes! I've recently come to realize that there is more to me than just being human. I'm also an American.

Giles: Yes, I suppose you are, in a manner of speaking. I mean, you were born here -- your mortal self.

Anya: Well that's right, foreigner! So I've been reading a lot about the Good 'Ol Us of A, embracing the extraordinarily precious ideology that has helped to shape and define it.

Willow: Democracy?

Anya: Capitalism! The free market depends on the profitable exchange of goods for currency. It's a system of symbiotic beauty apparently lost on these old people. Look at 'em! Perusing the shelves, undressing the merchandise with their eyeballs! All ogle, no cash. It's not just annoying, it's Un-American.

Giles: Appalling. Almost as if they no longer believe money can buy happiness.

Anya: Totally unAmerican. Oh! And you know what else is un-American? French people!

Willow: You don't say.

Anya: From what I hear, they don't tip. French old people, now that's really the bottom of the barrel.

Xander: An! Hows about we try being just a bit less prejudiced and a bit more inclusive. Not us -- just you.

Anya: Fine. I'm gonna make those fogeys buy things.



Buffy: What is this? I thought I told you to do your homework!

Dawn: I was.

Buffy: Please don't lie to me.

Dawn: I'm not.

Willow: We were acting out a geometry problem, 'cause I read this really neat article that said kids learn math better if you, you stimulate their, uh, visual learning pattern. You know, using the right side of the brain instead of just the left? Stuff like that.

Buffy: Uh-huh.

Willow: So we made a triangle with our bodies, and that's when I called Xander obtuse, and he got really grumpy and then Dawn said we were "acute" triangle, and, well, hilarity ensued.

Buffy: Right. Well, you know what I think? I think maybe Dawn should do her homework at home.

Dawn: B-but it was working. I was really learning.

Buffy: Please get your stuff.

Dawn: Fine. Don't listen to me.

Willow: Please don't be grouchy with her. Who among us can resist the allure of really funny math puns?

Buffy: It's really important that Dawn finishes her schoolwork right now.

Willow: Yeah, I know, but...

Willow: We were having good clean educational fun, and then all of a sudden it was all gloom and doom and the outlawing of human triangles.

Buffy: It's really important that Dawn finishes her schoolwork right now.

Willow: I know it is, and I'm a big fan of school. You know me! I'm like, "Go school! It's your birthday!" Or something to that effect.

Buffy: Look, Willow, I know that you mean well, but you just don't understand, and there's no way that you could.

Willow: I do so understand, it ... you're stressed out.

Buffy: I'm more than stressed out. I'm freaked out.

Willow: Yeah, well, maybe you need a break to de-freak. Hey, you could go to the World's Culture fair if you want to, with me and Tara.

Buffy: I don't think so.

Willow: Come on. You can bring Dawn. It'll be fun. Good, educational-type fun in a discipline-y sort of way.

Buffy: I can't do it, Will. Don't worry. It's not like I don't have a life. I do. I have Dawn's life.



Willow: It wasn't anything really. Buffy was just a little crabby at Dawn about her schoolwork.

Tara: Well, it's understandable.

Willow: Yeah, sure it is. I'd totally be blowing off classes if I were in Dawnie's shoes.

Tara: Sweetie, you wouldn't blow off a class if your head was on fire. And, I meant Buffy.

Willow: Buffy what?

Tara: Understandable about the crabby. She has to look after Dawn now.

Willow: Yeah, but not in a Miss Minchin's Select Seminary For Girls way. I mean, she's just gonna make Dawnie more rebellious.

Tara: I had to deal with my brother's problems after ... I mean, you can't really know what it's like to-

Willow: Yeah, I know that.

Tara: I, I didn't mean to-

Willow: No, I just ... I ... I know I can't know what you went through. But I just ... It's no big.

Tara: I made you mad.

Willow: No. No.

Tara: All I meant was-

Willow: No, it's okay. This whole Buffy thing, let's just forget it.

Tara: No, please. I mean, I mean, tell me if I said something wrong, otherwise I know I'll say it again. Probably often and in public.

Willow: No, I was snippy gal. It's just ... I know I can't ... on some level ... it's like my opinion isn't worth anything because I haven't been through ... I didn't lose my mom, so I don't know.

Tara: Well ... I-I'm not the expert. I mean, I've only lost the one. Do ... I act like ... the big knowledge woman?

Willow: No.

Tara: Is that no spelled Y-E-S?

Willow: S-O-R-T of. I mean, I just feel like the-the junior partner. You've been doing everything longer than me. You've been out longer ... you've been practicing witchcraft way longer.

Tara: Oh, but you're way beyond me there! In just a few- I mean ... it frightens me how powerful you're getting.

Willow: That's a weird word.

Tara: "Getting"?

Willow: It frightens you? I frighten you?

Tara: That is so not what I meant. I meant i-impresses - impressive.

Willow: Well, I took Psych 101. I mean, I took it from an evil government scientist who was skewered by her Frankenstein-like creation before the final, but I know what a Freudian slip is. D-don't you trust me?

Tara: With my life.

Willow: That's not what I mean.

Tara: Can't we just go to the fair?

Willow: I don't feel real multicultural right now. Wh ... what is it about me that you don't trust?

Tara: It's not that. I worry, sometimes. You're, you're changing so much, so fast. I don't know where you're heading.

Willow: Where I'm heading?

Tara: I'm saying everything wrong.

Willow: No, I think you're being pretty clear. This isn't about the witchcraft. It's about the other changes in my life.

Tara: I trust you. I just ... I don't know where I'm gonna fit in ... in your life when...

Willow: When ... I change back? Yeah, this is a college thing, just a, a little experimentation before I get over the thrill and head back to boys' town.

Pause. You think that?

Tara: Should I?

Willow: I'm really sorry that I didn't establish my lesbo street cred before I got into this relationship. You're the only woman I've ever fallen in love with, so ... how on earth could you ever take me seriously?

Tara: Willow, please!

Willow: Have fun at the fair.



Buffy: What? You want gold stars? Okay. You can have gold stars.

Dawn: I don't want gold stars. I don't want any of this.

Buffy: I'm just trying to give you a normal life.

Dawn: Well, good luck. What? What am I doing wrong now?

Buffy: This is for real, Dawn.

Dawn: No, it's not. I'm not real, so why would my exciting graph of chores be real? Who cares if a key gets an education anyway?

Buffy: It's a chart. Not a graph. And you are real.

Dawn: Yeah? Those monks put grades K through eight in my head. Can't we just wait and see if they drop nine in there too?

Buffy: Damn it, Dawn. This is serious.

Dawn: Why? Why should I care about any of this?

Buffy: Because they'll take you away!

Dawn: Take me away? What do you mean?

Buffy: They'll take you away from me. That's what your principal told me when you weren't in the room. If I can't make you go to school, then I won't be found fit to be your legal guardian.

Dawn: Where would I go?

Buffy: I don't know. Dad maybe ... or foster care ... I, I didn't really want to ask.

Dawn: You could've told me that.

Buffy: I just did.



Glory: I'll kill her and ... and them I'll kill him, and her and her, and it'll all be your fault. Kinda funny, isn't it? All these people here and ... no one who can do a thing. Not a person who can help you. But that's people for ya. They're pretty worthless. But keys, on the other hand ... keys are worth a very lot. You lying little tramp! You're not the key, you're nothing! Just another worthless human being!

Tara: I didn't-

Glory: I hate being lied to. It makes me feel so betrayed. Hey! You wanna make it all better? If you tell me who the key really is ... I'll let you go. Think about it. You think your hand hurts? Imagine what you'd feel with my fingers wiggling in your brain. It doesn't kill you. What it does ... is make you feel like you're in a noisy little dark room ... naked and ashamed ... and there are things in the dark that need to hurt you because you're bad ... little pinching things that go in your ears ... and crawl on the inside of your skull. And you know ... that if the noise and the crawling would stop ... that you could remember how to get out. But you never, ever will. Who ... is ... the key? Fine. Let's get crazy.



Willow: Can she go home now?

Doctor: Unfortunately, no. Hospital policy dictates we keep her for the night.

Willow: But does she have to? I-I can take care of her at home.

Tara: It's poisoned. Why don't I tell you that? It, it has to be checked, though.

Doctor: She your sister?

Tara: I-i-it has to be verified, of course. Anyone can tell you that. Of course. Of course, of course.

Willow: She's my everything.



Spike: No one's gonna hurt you.

Dawn: Oh yeah? Same no one who did that to you?

Spike: What, these? It's just a few bruises. Nothin' to write home about. Hey, chin up, platelet. Don't get scared. Maybe Glory doesn't wanna kill you, maybe it's something-

Dawn: Worse?

Spike: Hey.

Dawn: You wanna know what I'm scared of, Spike? ... Me. Right now, Glory thinks Tara's the key. But I'm the key, Spike. I am. And anything that happens to Tara ... is 'cause of me. Your bruises, your limp ... that's all me too. I'm like a lightning rod for pain and hurt. And everyone around me suffers and dies. I ... must be something so horrible ... to cause so much pain ... and evil.

Spike: Rot.

Dawn: What do you know?

Spike: I'm a vampire. I know somethin' about evil. You're not evil.

Dawn: Maybe ... I'm not evil. But I don't think I can be good.

Spike: Well, I'm not good, and I'm okay.



Tara: Don't! Please don't with that treachery! I told the cat. And now I beg my mother sitting all alone.



Glory: You know, I think I'm a little buzzed from eating that witch! What a mind she has. Mmm, nummy treat.

Jinx: Is your grace not the slightest bit concerned about-

Glory: What, about the Slayer? Don't be stupid. I know I'm closing in. The key's as good as mine. Girl like Buffy's got just so many friends. All I gotta do it rip through 'em one by one until I finally... Did anybody order an apocalypse?

Willow: Kali, Hera, Kronos, Tonic. Air like nectar, thick as onyx. Cassiel by your second star...

Glory: Uhh. It's the lover. That's so cute.

Willow: Hold mine victim as in tar. I ... owe ... you ... pain!



Glory: Is that it? Is that the best you can do? You think I care about all this, the apartment, the clothes? Now, sucking on your girlfriend's mind? That was something to treasure. What's this? Bag of tricks? Bag of knives.

Willow: Spirit of serpents now appear. Hissing, writhing, striking near.

Glory: Now this is getting weak. And so are you, honey. Aren't ya?

Willow: No!

Glory: Know what they used to do to witches, lover? Crucify 'em.

Buffy: They used to bow down to gods. Things change.



Buffy: Chicken salad?

Willow: Right here.

Buffy: Eggplant, that's me ... salami with ... ew, peanut butter? Dawn.

Dawn: Yeah, like eggplant is normal. It's what, half egg, half plant? 'Cause that's just unnatural.

Willow: What's Tara got?

Dawn: Oh. I ... got her tuna. Does she like...? Tara?

Tara: Plastic and their six sisters. Six sick sisters. Willow?

Willow: It's okay. Let's just start slow today. Um, Buffy, could I have that? Here you go. That's my girl.

Dawn: Can I help?

Buffy: What are you gonna need?

Willow: I don't know. They gave me a lot of stuff to ... keep her calm. They said I might have to restrain her at night. But ... sometimes she's fine. She looks at me, and ... she's fine.

Buffy: I'm sorry I couldn't-

Willow: It's okay. I can do this. I'm gonna take care of her. Even if she never... She's my girl.

Buffy: I understand.

Willow: I know you do. Hear that, baby? You're my always.

Glory: I told you this wasn't over.

Tara: No. The place is cracking! It's cracking! Cracking, no, no, no!

Dawn: No, Tara, it's okay.

Tara: Oh, look at that, look at that. The light! Oh, it's so pure! Such pure green energy! Oh, it's so beautiful.



----------

Story: 10

Acting: 8

Writing: 9

Picture: 10

Gripping: 9

My Rank: 9

----------

Total: 9.1

"Buffy" very frequently alternates action-packed episodes with talky ones, but the end of Season Five takes this far beyond rational limits. In between "Tough Love" and "The Weight of the World," two episodes where literally nothing happens, you've got "Spiral," which is explosive to the point of self-parody. Then to close you've got "The Gift" which ends in near-apocalypse but sure does take its sweet time in getting there. Give the producers credit for not making the same mistake they made with the earlier "Shadow"-"Listening to Fear"-"Into the Woods" trilogy and stringing together a series of episodes with identical tone and theme, but deduct several points for boring the hell out of the audience just when the intensity level should be running wild.



Here's what basically happens between now and the end of the season: Glory brain-sucks Tara. Willow seeks revenge, leading to Glory discovering that Dawn is the key. Glory pursues and kidnaps Dawn. The gang intervenes to rescue Dawn, with Buffy giving her life in the process. That's really only two episodes worth of action, which is here elongated not very convincingly to four. Compared to "Becoming" or "Graduation Day," the Season Five ending sequence is a huge letdown. For Season Four, at least, the showrunners realized that the Initiative storyline was a flop and ended instead on a wildly successful Joss experiment.



"Tough Love" is an incredibly dull episode, even allowing for the appearance of This-Time-It's-Personal Willow. (Who by the way is awfully hard to take seriously. It's just difficult to envision a superwitch with such fluffy hair.) A lot of the scenes are more things we need to see than things we want to see, like Willow and Tara's painful argument or Buffy begging Giles to discipline Dawn for her. Buffy's long-established self-centeredness reaches operatic levels here ("All of a sudden it was all gloom and doom and the outlawing of human triangles") which is weird considering how close it comes to her making the ultimate sacrifice. It's true that the threat of Dawn being taken away is very real, by either Glory or Child Protection Services, but does Buffy ever to stop to think about how any of what she saying sounds to the people she's talking to?



Then there's the structural problem of Vengeance Willow. Her fight with Glory is pretty cool (and her dialogue is the same blend of Vampire Willow and Regular Willow that made Season Six's closing shows so interesting) but somebody has to come out of it looking pretty stupid. Either Willow is suicidal (not likely) or all the noise the writers have made all season about Glory being an untouchable, unbeatable god is just that: noise. Seeing as Willow has never gone into combat alone before (unless you count staking a single vampire from behind with a floating pencil in "Choices") yet manages to at least slow down Glory (and not get, you know, horribly killed) my guess is it's the writers' problem.



The final scene, where Glory finally determines the key's identity, loses all of its impact since we've only been anticipating it since "No Place Like Home." The mayor would have figured it out weeks ago. Adam would just have known. Angelus would have killed Dawn by this point on general principle. A lot of these last few Season Five episodes really lose their bite due to Glory's general lameness. Her scene with Tara is pretty creepy, though. It's the two big set pieces -- the brain-suck and the magic battle -- that make "Tough Love" worth watching.