Callan

Callan [ on Surtees ]: You don't expect him to drop dead, then, just to please you, do you? Hunter: No. Which is why we're having this private talk.

Freddy [ on the photography studio ]: You have to be a member of the club, of course. We can't just have people wandering in and banging away with a camera, can we? Callan: Oh, Lord no. Of course we can't. Ummm, how much is it? Freddy: Ten bob a year. Callan: Oh that's very exclusive, isn't it?

Lonely: It's dead parky an' all. I could get a nice little fire going with these things. Callan: Listen mate, it's bad enough being cooped up with you for three hours without having you steaming as well. Lonely: Yeah, well I'm always inclined to sweat a bit before a job. Callan: So I've noticed. If you don't take a bath at least take a walk sometimes!

Callan: This is the best job you could get is it? Harry's Strip Bar: Lavatory Attendant. Lonely: Hygiene Operative! Callan: Oh, I beg your pardon. Lonely:It's honest work, Mr. Callan. Callan: Yeah, that's not all that's wrong with it.

Bishop [ on the suggestion that Surtees is still working for the Russians ]: Do you accept his theory? Hunter: The theory doesn't have to be right, does it? It just has to work.

Callan [ on his flat ]: Don't say what a nice place you've got here because I can't stand hypocrites.

Callan: Look up the files. This department has been mixed up in some pretty dirty, dodgey operations, sir, hasn't it? I mean, let's face it. A little light blackmail is something we do for relief. Hunter: Yes, well I've been through the files and there's nothing in them that even hints at a situation of this kind. Callan: I've been involved in some operations that would never make the files. Some of the fellows who have sat behind that desk where you sit have played their cards pretty close to the chest. Hunter: It seems to me you're getting a certain smug satisfaction out of all this, Callan. Callan [ smugly ]: No, no, no. But let's face it, it had to happen. It really did have to happen, didn't it? Hunter: What had to happen? Callan: That some dirty caper would catch up to us and bite us.

Callan: Last time we met you were Foreign Office. Bishop: In addition to swearing and smoking, I also tell lies.

Hunter: You could have stopped him talking to the reporters. Callan: Well, blimey, what did you expect me to do? Clobber him as soon as he opened his mouth, sir? Bishop [ referring to a newspaper headline: "Returned Agent Hints At Security Scandal" ]: It might have made fractionally larger headlines.