Celebrity Poker Showdown

Season 2 Episode 3

Tournament 2 Game 3

Aired Tuesday 8:00 PM Jun 10, 2004 on Bravo
out of 10
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Episode Summary

Tournament 2 Game 3
Jeremy Sisto, Adam Rodriguez, Norm Macdonald, Star Jones, and Micheal Ian Black play in tonight's tournament.

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    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (11)

      • Match Results:
        1st Place - Michael Ian Black
        2nd Place - Norm MacDonald
        3rd Place - Jeremy Sisto
        4th Place - Star Jones
        5th Place - Adam Rodriguez

      • Celebrity Charity List:
        Adam Rodriguez - VH1 Save the Music Foundation
        Star Jones - East Harlem School of Exodus House
        Norm MacDonald - The Hole in the Wall Gang
        Jeremy Sisto - The Linden Center
        Michael Ian Black - Endeavor House

      • How Would You Play It: The viewers played with Jeremy Sisto's ace-ten off-suit.

      • Dave's pick to win the game was Jeremy Sisto.

      • Phil's pick to win the game was Michael Ian Black.

      • Adam made history on the show by being the first ever person to get eliminated on the very first hand. His taped interview didn't even get a chance to be shown prior to his elimination.

      • During the time she played in CPS, she used to play poker with Whoopi Goldberg and her friends on Wednesday nights.

      • Norm MacDonald, because of his outfit and demeanor, was called "The Crazed Love Child of Paul Newman and Charlie Chaplin" by Dave at one point.

      • On one of the hands, Michael Ian Black included an autographed photo of David Copperfield with his raise. And for a duration on his head-to-head with Norm, he has David's photo standing up on the side of the table for luck.

      • After coming back from being down to 4000 chips to gaining up to 16000 in chips (with the last hand won on the river), Michael was called "Miracle Michael" by Phil Gordon.

      • Michael Ian Black won even though Norm MacDonald had 46,000 chips to Black's 4,000 near the end. It was at this point that Michael was forced All-In for two consecutive hands at the deal because he had less than the Blinds (they were at $5,000-$10,000 by then).

    • QUOTES (47)

      • (during the show introduction)
        Dave: Welcome to Celebrity Poker Showdown. This is the only place in show business where an actress with a big pair can still end up a loser.

      • Norm: Dave is a brilliant unreleased masterpiece. It's on video stores.
        Dave: I am a misunderstood genius, much like Orson Welles.

      • Star: You have that Richard Branson billionaire look to you.
        Dave: You know, I've got everything but the billions.

      • Michael: When you get the chance, can I get a little more whipped cream on this?
        Adam: What did you get there, a [bleep] sundae?
        Michael: It's what you call a man's drink, Adam. I don't know if you're familiar with it.

      • (on Norm wearing sunglasses)
        Phil: People wear sunglasses at the table to conceal when they're looking at you, not to conceal their own eyes.
        Dave: Or he's wrongly decided that's it's dashing.

      • Adam: I don't think I know what to do at this point.
        Phil: You just say "All in" I think is what you do.

      • (after Adam goes all in with only a pair after the river)
        Phil: I'd have to say that was really a crappy play.
        Dave: Is that the technical term for it?
        Phil: Yeah, I don't see any other way to call it but just a really crappy play.

      • (after getting eliminated on the first hand)
        Adam: I didn't even get to finish my first drink.

      • Adam: I did everything wrong, right?
        Phil: Pretty much. But the good thing is we're gonna have a long time on this couch and learn from the other players that are still on the table.

      • Adam: That was like the first time having sex. I'm like "This is great but it's over?". Whatever.
        Dave: Well, you prematurely ejaculated all your chips all over Norm MacDonald.

      • Michael: I'll be honest. I never liked Adam.

      • (on taped interview)
        Star: Don't let this pretty face fool you. I got a poker face.

      • (after the whipped cream on Michael's drink fell off)
        Adam: That was like my poker play.
        Dave: It was symbolic.

      • (after Michael and Star folded)
        Phil: When you have a lot of chips, you can really exert pressure on your opponents by making a bet and Norm stole that pot from both of them.
        Dave: That doesn't make it right.

      • (on taped interview)
        Norm: Phil Gordon will be watching and critiquing everything you do at that card table. That's gonna be tough on a lot of players. Not gonna be tough on me. Because I've prepared for this game. What I did was the other night I had sex with a filthy prostitute and I had Phil come in and critique it. And I thought he was kind of unfair.

      • Norm: Where's the banter? I hear there's gonna be banter.
        Adam: (off-stage) It's over here in the Losers' Lounge, sir!

      • Phil: (on Norm) He's trying to act weak here. When your opponent acts weak, they're usually strong. At the poker table, strength means weakness and weakness means strength.
        Dave: Oh that doesn't apply in bar-fighting. If a guy looks strong, he probably is.

      • Adam: I'm pulling for Norm now 'cause he's got all my money so I feel like my money's at least going in the Hole in the Wall charity.
        Dave: It's like wanting the person that adopts your children... you want them to be a good person.
        Adam: Of course.
        Dave: And he's the adoptive parents of your chips.

      • (on taped interview)
        Jeremy: When I was a kid, I didn't play cards. I played sports sometimes, you know, with my mom.

      • (on taped interview)
        Jeremy: I like to play poker with the lonely people in the casinos. I like to take their money.

      • (going into commercial break)
        Dave: Jeremy Sisto wants the evil role, does he? He's gonna have to wrestle it away from Devil Spawn and Canadian Norm MacDonald.

      • (on taped interview)
        Michael: I'm Michael Ian Black and I'm playing for Endeavor House, which is a group for mentally-challenged adults. It's a category I myself fit into.

      • (on taped interview)
        Michael: The biggest lesson I learned for Celebrity Poker Showdown last season was not to be such a [bleep] idiot. If I can just be not a [bleep] idiot for let's say an hour or two, I think I have a shot of coming in third.

      • (on taped interview)
        Michael: I think last time my intention was to do very well and win. I'm gonna take the opposite strategy this time -- Play poorly and lose.

      • Michael: (pacing beside his chair) It's tension. There's a lot of tension. And also, I wanna show off my physique. (pointing to his body) Literally, minutes in the gym.

      • (after Jeremy himself paced around while deciding on a hand)
        Phil: If we don't have the best hand right now, we're drawing on so slim. We only have a 6% chance at it on our time on the river.
        Dave: But the good news for us -- if we a re Jeremy right now -- the ladies like our ass better.

      • (after Norm himself paced around and raises his shirt)
        Dave: Ooh, and things have taken an ugly turn.

      • Star: (On Jeremy's character in "Six Feet Under") He scares me because you like a bad boy and you know he's completely whacked out. You really wanna do him and it doesn't matter. You know what I'm saying?
        Michael: Believe me, I've been down that road so many times. And I keep telling myself, "Honey, do not make the same mistake." But I can't help it, I love those bad boys.

      • (after Norm folds a pair of sevens before the flop)
        Phil: That's a very strange play.
        Dave: Norm's a very strange man.

      • Michael: You guys remember Adam?
        Jeremy: Adam?
        Michael: Yeah, remember him?
        Jeremy: Oh yeah.wa

      • (on taped interview)
        Adam: I have no idea what I'm doing but that's not gonna stop me from winning.

      • Star: I gotta tell you, you blew me away with the all-in on the first hand.
        Adam: You know, well, Norm challenged me.
        Star: Well, you shouldn't play "whose is bigger?". Whenever boys play "whose is bigger?", it's stupid. Whenever you're dealing with men, it all comes down to whose got the bigger what. I'm gonna unzip my pants. I'm gonna whip it out. That's not smart.
        Dave: But it is good television. So you know, whoever has the biggest one out there, please flop it on the table.

      • Norm: What's he got out there?
        Robert: 5700 to call.
        Norm: What's he got out there?
        Robert: Sorry?
        Norm: How much money has he got?
        Robert: 8700.
        Michael: (taking out a hundred dollar bill from his wallet) It's about to be 8800, Norm MacDonald.
        Robert: 8800.
        Michael: And my room key.

      • (after Norm calls with a Queen-nine offsuit)
        Phil: Very strange at this point of the tournament.
        Dave: By strange you mean?
        Phil: Questionable.
        Dave: By questionable you mean?
        Phil: Strange.
        Dave: By that you mean, ultimately disappointing.

      • (after the commercial break)
        Dave: Welcome back to the Palms in Las Vegas, Nevada where prostitution is not only legal. It's mandatory.

      • Phil: (on Jeremy) He's trying to appear strong. He's trying to appear confrontational. He's sitting up in his chair. Everything about this hand is different than the hand where he had the aces.
        Dave: You know who else does that? Pufferfish. They try to look bigger than they are.

      • Dave: Now these tells... the pros... do they still have these tells or are they just more subtle with the pros?
        Phil: It's a lot more subtle. These guys are actors. They act. They overact. They're easier to read for me.

      • (on taped interview)
        Michael: I think Norm is a degenerate gambler. I think I'll just let him self-destruct.

      • Norman: (deciding on a bet) What would he have if he won?
        Michael: Some more of your money.
        Norman: Not my money.
        Michael: The money of the dying children of The Hole in the Wall Gang. Yes.
        Norman: No, I can't do that to them.

      • (on taped interview)
        Michael: I don't see it as friendly competition. I see it as vanquishing foes. I'm there to vanquish foes. And we know who the real foes are. (pointing at his heart) They're in here. They live right in here.

      • (after Michael goes all-in against Norm)
        Phil: That's a great play here. Michael's all-in and Norm's definitely gonna call there.
        Star: Norm has got to call, at least.
        Dave: But Norm's crazy. There's no telling what a crazy man's gonna do out there.

      • (after Norm folded)
        Dave: You're the poker expert but I'm an expert on crazy people.

      • (after he partially tore David Copperfield's photo)
        Michael: Who's got some scotch tape?

      • (after Norm calls Michael's all-in)
        Robert: Norm has more money than Michael.
        Michael: But he's not a better person.

      • (after several chip lead changes)
        Phil: Back and forth just like heavyweight boxers slogging it out at the poker table.

      • Dave: Norm, I know where you can get a photograph of Lance Burton's scrotum.
        Norm: Is it in your wallet?
        Dave: Yeah.

      • Dave: (pointing at David Copperfield's photo) You had some powerful help there.
        Michael: It really wasn't fair. When you bring David Copperfield into the mix, forget about it.

    • NOTES (0)

    • ALLUSIONS (0)