Celebrity Poker Showdown

Season 4 Episode 4

Tournament 4 Game 4

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Aired Tuesday 8:00 PM Nov 07, 2004 on Bravo
9.6
out of 10
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8 votes
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Episode Summary

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Tournament 4 Game 4
AIRED:
Chevy Chase, Donny Deutsch, Shannon Elizabeth, Kathy Griffin, and Neil Patrick Harris played in tonight's tournament.

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SUBMIT REVIEW

    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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    • TRIVIA (15)

    • QUOTES (51)

      • Dave: Kathy Griffin, you're playing for the Rape Foundation. I hope this doesn't affect our friendship, but I'm against rape.

      • Dave: The game we play here is No Limit Texas Hold 'Em. And I'm sure you're all very familiar with how the game works.
        Kathy: Same philosophy as SlapJack?
        Dave: Exactly.

      • Dave: Recover from the ghost bar?
        Phil: Hey easy!
        Dave: They're still picking waitresses out of your lapels this morning is what I heard.

      • (after Shannon lit up something and circled smoke around herself)
        Chevy: What is that?
        Neil: She's smoking a joint.
        Shannon: I'm lighting sage. I'm clearing my energy and my spot. I'm getting good cards.

      • Chevy: I'm hoping I can get out of here in time for my abortion.

      • (on taped interview)
        Neil: My strategy for today is to act like I was really hung over and drank a lot the night before. So that everyone thought I was off my game. The problem is, I drank a lot last night. So I don't know if that strategy is going to work so well.

      • (on taped interview)
        Neil: Kathy is a good player if she just shut up. Here's hoping she's got laryngitis tonight.

      • (after Kathy kept changing her mind on what to do with her hand)
        Chevy: I'd go all-in and then fold.

      • Kathy: Can I bet more money than you can imagine?
        Robert: Absolutely.

      • (after Kathy bluffed Shannon into folding by betting half her chips)
        Donny: (to Kathy) What did you have?
        Chevy: Maybe pocket clubs?

      • (after Shannon bet 1200 after the river)
        Phil: Notice her staring right at him. Do you see that stare?
        Dave: Yeah, I see Shannon, Phil. Yes, I can see her.
        Phil: When your opponent stares at you like that, you can be fairly certain they don't have a good hand.
        Dave: Either that or she just has dreamy eyes.
        Phil: She does.

      • (on taped interview)
        Shannon: Since the last time, I've learned a little more on how to read people and make a little bit better decisions.

      • (on taped interview)
        Shannon: I'll mix it up. I'll play smart. I'll play dumb. And they won't know what to do with me.

      • (on taped interview)
        Chevy: When I was a child, we were not able to play many sports so all we did was play Texas Hold 'Em from the time I was 4 'til about 38.

      • (on taped interview)
        Chevy: My best asset. My breasts.

      • (on taped interview)
        Chevy: I'm a sore winner. But a very very good loser.

      • Phil: That little white disc is called the dealer button.
        Dave: And yet the dealer never uses it.

      • (after Kathy re-raised to 2400 before the flop)
        Audience: She's bluffing!
        Chevy: She's not bluffing. And neither am I.

      • (on taped interview)
        Donny: Show me someone who is a good loser, they lose a lot.

      • Dave: Welcome back to the Palms in Las Vegas, the hotel that's putting legal prostitution out of business.

      • (on taped interview)
        Kathy: I was a competitive little kid. And I usually ended up getting my ass kicked.

      • (on taped interview)
        Kathy: I like to call, check, and talk. And Occasionally I like to look at my cards.

      • Audience Member: Be the card!
        Chevy: Be the card?

      • (after Kathy went all-in)
        Kathy: Shannon, you know me!
        Shannon: I know you're full of [bleep]!

      • Female Audience Member: Come on, Shannon!
        Male Audience Member: Light some sage!

      • (after doubling up to more than 24,000 in chips)
        Shannon: Oh my God, my heart is pounding. I think I'm gonna have a heart attack.

      • Dave: I just parrot whatever Phil tells me to say. I am literally a hand puppet for most of the show.
        Kathy: How could you become Phil Gordon's bitch?

      • Dave: The good news is we've limited the amount of damage your charity can do. $5,000.00. For funding rape.
        Kathy: No, no, no, no, no. They help women who're victims of sexual assault.
        Dave: Well, that's a much better charity than I thought it was.

      • Kathy: (on Shannon) I'm not saying that she's a witch, but at least she's a wicken.

      • Chevy: You know what kills you are the blinds. They just get bigger and bigger.
        Kathy: Phil, they should just get rid of those. They're stupid and don't make sense.
        Chevy: You either got to go all-in or wet your pants, which I have.

      • Chevy: So I have to sit on this lounge, Dave?
        Dave: For hours and hours and hours.
        Kathy: Not a happy place, Chevy. I'm not gonna lie. Bitter, unhappy place.
        Chevy: You've been here before?
        Kathy: Yeah, I have.
        Chevy: You've played this before?
        Kathy: Back off!

      • Donny: I haven't played this hand well. Right, Phil?
        Phil: (off-stage) I don't know what you have.
        Donny: Scold me. Beat me.

      • Kathy: What are the blinds now?
        Phil: Blinds are 300 and 600 still.
        Dave: And it no longer affects you.

      • Dave: Hi, welcome back to the Palms in Las Vegas. If you're a topless hottie, you should be here!

      • (on taped interview)
        Neil: Donny Deutsch is the dark horse at our table. No one seems to know him. Donny, I hear, is also a pathological liar. So don't believe anything he says.

      • (after Shannon puts on a pair of sunglasses)
        Neil: There they go. There they go.
        Shannon: You always study me.

      • (after Shannon puts on a pair of sunglasses)
        Audience Member: (to Neil) Watch the lips!

      • (on taped interview)
        Shannon: There's no game that makes me shake like this game. I get so nervous. When you've going all-in and you got big bets out there when a lot of people are in the hand, I shake. I get really scared. And I think there's no better reward than when you win that hand. It's exhilarating.

      • (after Donny went all-in)
        Shannon: There's two more there.
        Donny: Oh, where is it?
        Shannon: Up against the wall.
        Donny: Oooh baby, I love when you talk dirty like that.

      • (after Donny flopped three Jacks)
        Donny: Can we just stop now?

      • (after Shannon doubled up Donny after her Ace-Kings didn't hold up)
        Phil: She did exactly what she needed to do. She just got a little unlucky. You gotta shake it off and move on to the next hand.
        Dave: You're never gonna say anything against her, are you?
        Phil: No.
        Dave: No. Alright, fine.

      • Robert: Shannon is the first to act.
        Dave: And your girlfriend has three-nine suited.
        Phil: Her husband's a friend of mine, Dave. Take it easy.

      • (audience members shouting while Shannon was deciding on calling Neil)
        Phil: The crowd's getting restless.
        Dave: Yeah, let's get that man removed.

      • (on taped interview)
        Neil: I've never played in a tournament so I don't know the heads-up thing. I've watched it but sitting at home is a whole different thing than doing it with a thousand dollar blinds.

      • Phil: Alright, Shannon's gotta get back on track and start being aggressive again.
        Dave: Or you'll stop loving her?
        Phil: Probably not.

      • Dave: You're playing for the Animal...
        Shannon: Animal Avengers.
        Dave: Which is an organization that helps cats and dogs fight crime.
        Shannon: Basically yeah. We avenge crime.
        Dave: They're super cats and super dogs with special powers.

      • (after doubling up to more than 40,000 in chips)
        Neil: I have never felt worse about winning a pot in my life.

      • (during their heads-up)
        Neil: You know you single-handedly eliminated everyone on this table.
        Shannon: Not everyone.

      • (after Shannon wore her sunglasses back)
        Neil: First you almost cried. Now, you look like a blind person.

      • (on the final hand of the tournament)
        Phil: She's gonna go all-in!
        Dave: Get ready for waterworks.

      • (Shannon's Ace-deuce against Neil's pair of Kings)
        Phil: It's not that bad for Shannon. She has a 25% chance to win.
        Dave: And a 75% chance to cry.

    • NOTES (0)

    • ALLUSIONS (1)

      • Dave: Welcome to Celebrity Poker Showdown. We are the only show on television that gives you an up-close look at the inner workings of a police forensics lab. Oh, no probably we're the only show that doesn't do that.

        Dave was referring to shows like CSI and Cold Case, both showing on CBS, which deal with solving crime using forensic technology and expertise.

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