Celebrity Poker Showdown

Season 4 Episode 5

Tournament 4 Game 5

Aired Tuesday 8:00 PM Nov 14, 2004 on Bravo
out of 10
User Rating
4 votes

By TV.com Users

Episode Summary

Tournament 4 Game 5
Mekhi Phifer, Dave Navarro, Angela Bassett, Emily Procter, and Jeff Garlin played in tonight's tournament.

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    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (11)

    • QUOTES (45)

      • Dave F.: (entering to the applause of the audience) Good evening! That was wonderful. I don't even care if it's sincere.

      • Dave F.: Welcome to Celebrity Poker Showdown. We are here in Las Vegas, Hollywood's playground. And tonight, the cool kids have taken over the swing set and they're going to play poker for charity.

      • Angela: (touching the silver chip) Oooh, it's got some weight to it.
        Dave F.: So do I. I mean if that's all it takes to impress you.

      • Emily: (on Dave Navarro checking out Dave Foley) You know what he did? He checked you out and he looked at his stack of chips and then he went back and looked again.
        Jeff: 'Cause you can be bought, can't you, my friend? You're a gentle gentle lovemaker.

      • Jeff: My question right now is Dave that popular or when anyone of us win, we'll get that kind of response?

      • (on taped interview)
        Dave N.: I have a silver chip from last season. I'd like to have a gold chip. It wouldn't hurt.

      • (on taped interview)
        Dave N.: I watched the second episode which was the big Championship over and over and over and over again in the dark.

      • (on taped interview)
        Dave N.: I'm not a real poker player. I'm not a gambler. I love doing this. If I win this tonight, it would be the most important thing that ever happened to me. And I will consider myself the greatest poker player of all-time.

      • Phil: He has an unbeatable hand right now.
        Dave F.: And beautiful black nail polish on that hand.

      • Phil: Wow, why didn't he bet the river there? He rivered the inside straight and he didn't bet the river? He had the immortal nuts. There's no hand that Mekhi could have that he'd be beat. And he checked?

      • (on taped interview)
        Angela: Poker is skill and luck together. And I feel like a little bit lucky individual.

      • (on taped interview)
        Angela: I like Mekhi, you know. (laughs) As an actor of course. As a professional. If Mekhi Phifer flirts with me, he might very well throw off my game.

      • (on taped interview)
        Jeff: My best asset as a player is my ass. I have the greatest ass when it comes to poker playing. When I'm sitting in that chair, you don't know how nice my ass looks. It curves perfectly to the poker chair.

      • (on taped interview)
        Jeff: Do I have any tells? I touch myself a lot. But that has nothing to do with the game.

      • (on taped interview)
        Jeff: Baron Van Hugecock is my nickname. My wife doesn't call me that but other people do. That's my poker name.

      • (after Dave kept calling Emily's bets)
        Jeff: (to Dave) 'Cause you don't wanna be no pussy.

      • (on taped interview)
        Emily: Aggression is the only way to play this game tonight.

      • (on taped interview)
        Emily: I love Dave Navarro so much. That's why I wore a v-neck. Do you think his wife will be mad?

      • (on taped interview)
        Emily: Angela and I might end up head-to-head girl-on-girl action in Vegas. Can I say that on television.

      • Dave F.: By the way, that image of Christ on Dave's shirt was not there when he purchased it. It just appeared one day. And he gets followed around by pilgrims all the time now.

      • (on taped interview)
        Mekhi: Novices are harder to read than world-class champions.

      • (on taped interview)
        Mekhi: Call me The Plague. I'm Black Death, baby!

      • (after the community cards showed two aces and two sevens)
        Jeff: That means somebody could have a full house. I don't wanna get people excited.
        Emily: I think someone's got it. Shall we side bet?
        Jeff: Let's side bet. All my chips for your bra.

      • (after a straight draw appeared on the turn)
        Emily: This is where in my home game we say, "Have a straight or F.O.".
        Dave F.: F.O. of course is the abbreviation for Foreign Office.

      • Dave F.: You know I think would be fun? Is if Dave Navarro's shirt... if Jesus was smiling or frowning depending on how well he's doing.
        Phil: He'd be frowning now, for sure.

      • Dave N.: (talking on the phone) Honey, I lost. And I didn't just lose. I lost huge. And your ex-husband won. How 'bout that? Anyway, I love you. I gotta go and I'm here with my friend, my handsome friend Mr. Dave Foley. And we love you, bye.

      • (after Dave Navarro got eliminated first)
        Dave F.: I'm gonna take the blame 'cause you were my pick to win. And so far, anyone I picked to win loses.
        Dave N.: Well, next time, don't pick me.

      • (on the Losers' Lounge)
        Dave F.: We've got those fluffy things.
        Dave N.: (holding the fluffy things) You've got these. Where else can you get these?
        Dave F.: Those are to warm your testicles. We wear them 'cause our doctor advises us to.
        Dave N.: What's nice is that there's four of 'em because then you could do testicular and nipples.
        Dave F.: That's true.
        Dave N.: Which is nice. You got a full set going.
        Dave F.: What's the point of having warm testicles when your nipples are cold.

      • Dave N.: I put some thought into the Power of the Christ. But I think that ultimately what he gave me was a valuable lesson.
        Phil: Even Jesus Christ wouldn't have played Jack-three with all of His chips.
        Dave F.: He might've played 'em but by the time they hit the table, they wouldn't have been a Jack-three anymore.

      • Dave N.: When I was heads-up with Emily and looking in her eyes, I was just completely... I couldn't think. I just went on system overload.

      • Dave N.: (to Tammy) Do you have a prescription of Prozac available?
        Dave F.: If you don't, I'll run up to my room and get some.

      • Emily: (to Mekhi and Jeff) Did you make gentle love last night?
        Mekhi: Hell, no!

      • (after Angela went all-in with Mekhi and lost the pot)
        Phil: She lost her groove in the last hand for sure.

      • Jeff: Dave, please take care of yourself in there. It can get crazy over in the Losers' Lounge. And Angela, you're just class wherever you go.

      • Dave F.: Mekhi is just playing with a lot of flat-out aggression.
        Dave N.: And a lot of vodka, apparently. That's what Angela told me.

      • Dave F.: We still have three players out at the table. I wonder what numbers of chips each of them might have. If there was any way we could find out. Perhaps there's a list of names and numbers beside them that you might have.
        Phil: You know someone that has that information?
        Dave F.: Just do the chip count!

      • Audience Member: All-in!
        Jeff: My ass all-in.

      • Audience Member: All-in!
        Jeff: If you say all-in again, I'm gonna go all-in naked.
        Audience: All-in! All-in!
        Jeff: Fold.

      • Jeff: Fifty percent of me feels really sad when I see you have to wear that outfit. And the other half goes, "Yawza!".

      • Emily: I need to know why that man loves you.
        Jeff: Oh, you're gonna find out in a matter of seconds.

      • Jeff: I'm the small one, right?
        Dave F.: (off-stage) Now, that's a phrase Jeff doesn't get to say often. "I'm the small one."

      • (on taped interview)
        Emily: I think my main concern about playing cards on television is A) that I don't give anything away and B) I don't want to be on television playing bad cards.

      • (on taped interview)
        Emily: If I lose and I played great cards, I would be happy.

      • (at the Losers' Lounge)
        Dave N.: Angela's back here and if Emily gets back here, I think we lower the lights a little. You know, maybe kick our shoes off and just kinda hang out. Couple of cocktails.
        Dave F.: What does Jesus think about that?
        Dave N.: (puts his ear to his shirt) He's all good with it.

      • Jeff: I've had more than my share of food. I actually can feed a small village based on things that I've eaten after I'm full.
        Dave F.: Is there any chance it's actually your fault that any of these people don't have food.

    • NOTES (1)

      • It was the second time Emily Procter has appeared on the show. Dave Navarro is appearing for the third time. He has won the silver chip in his tournament and went on to season three's Championship game where he placed second to Seth Meyers.

    • ALLUSIONS (1)

      • (audience kept on yelling to Emily what to do)
        Jeff: You know what? Let me tell you something, ladies and gentlemen. This is not the Price is Right.

        The Price is Right is a long-running CBS game show featuring contestants guessing the price of several items.