The Buddy System

Season 3, Episode 12, Aired

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When Buddy's (WILLIE AAMES) new girlfriend unceremoniously dumps him, he sinks into a bout of depression. Under the circumstances, Charles (SCOTT BAIO) requests that everyone be especially nice to Buddy. Walter (JAMES CALLAHAN) suggests they instead enroll their downhearted friend in the confidence-building class taught by ex-military officer Harry Hileman (DICK GAUTIER) . Unfortunately, the class works too well , and Buddy becomes pushy and obnoxious. Eager to get the "old" Buddy back, the family attends the class with him and profess their affection for him. When Buddy proclaims that he, too, loves the family, Hileman proudly congratulates him on graduating with honors. RelieVed, everyone goes back to insulting Buddy. . .as usual.moreless
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    • QUOTES (7)

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      • Charles: Buddy, where you been I've been calling you for days. Buddy: Oh, Hi Charles, I guess I lost all track of time and space, one does that when one is up to ones ears and the arms of love.

      • Charles: Buddy, everybody respects you. Jamie: Oh, Hi Charles, hey what's wrong with the yo-yo.

      • (Buddy receives a singing telegram from his girlfriend) Turkeyman: Never call me up, Never show your face, You are an embarrassment to the human race. Buddy Lembeck you're a bum, you're a meatball too, you are sleazy, you are scum, you and I are through.

      • Walter: Oh, hello Charles, well Lembeck you running around lose again, they sure don't make straight jackets like they used to.

      • Ellen: She's afraid you'll explode when you hear what Charles has to say. Walter: Why would I do a thing like that? Charles: Sir, I would like you to be nice to Buddy. Walter: Why would I do a thing like that?

      • Charles: I'd give anything to see Buddy act like a human being again. Walter: Again, I must've missed it the other time.

      • Walter: Well, Lembeck your weekend must have agreed with you, you look quite well. Buddy: Why thank you Walt, hey put on a few pounds, huh, well you know what they say hot air does expand.

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