Charles in Charge

Lila: Boy, you were right about Van, he's a jerk, his band only knows one song "Kiss me, you slimy crud".

Jill: Oh, why aren't you two asleep? Douglas: Can you sleep with a light bulb popping off on your face every five seconds? Jason: He was making out with his pillow.

Charles: Hey, Van, you know you and I have something in common, I led a band when I was in high school, we called ourselves the Charles-tones, What do you call yourselves? Van: The Scuzz.

Stan: Charles, don't you think this Van guys a hood? Charles: I don't think they have those anymore.

Van: I maybe going out on a limb here, but I don't think he likes me. Lila: Oh, sure he likes you, doesn't he, Charles? Charles: I'd say the jury's out.

Charles: Wait, wait a second did you say Van? Stan: Yeah, why do you know him? Charles: Uh, no, I don't know him, but... Stan: His name is Van, and he's from the moon.

Ed: My father's a Princeton man and a neurosurgeon, I'd like to follow in his footsteps. Stan: Welcome to the family.

Charles: Are we saying this is good, or are we saying this is bad? Douglas: May I take you in my confidence Charles. Charles: Do you have to Douglas?

Lila: So, what about my date? Stan: Well, that's great but remember what we talked about. Lila: I know I told him before I say yes, you and mom have to meet him to make sure he's normal.

Stan: Oh, that's right you have a bachelor party tonight. Charles and Buddy: Yup! Stan: Boy, I remember my bachelor party. Jill: You had a bachelor party? Stan: No, No.