I am becoming more and more bored by Charmed year eight. This is the third time so far this season where storylines have been recycled (The Source, body swaps and now superhero outfits) and I'm getting really tired with the uninteresting demons, uninteresting boyfriends and uninteresting story developments.
Battle of the Hexes sees Billie finding the mystical Belt of Gaia, which turns her into a superhero. The Belt gives Billie the power of turning men invisible for some reason, in order to balance out the sexes or something. Leo is turned invisible, adding another annoyance to Piper, who's already annoyed when she discovers that her booker is finding it difficult trying to get bands to perform in P3. Meanwhile, Paige meets her new love interest, Henry, who helps her out in a completely boring subplot involving her new charge. Also, Phoebe acts like a bigger spoilt whore than usual.
The main storyline was one of the worst in Charmed history. Remember when Charmed used to be about beautiful young women using their intuition to kill bad guys? They used to be powerful people who were good role models for young girls. The message that this episode gives is that all feminists are psychotic man-haters. What the hell happened to the writers? Are they braindead?
The last scene featured three of our leads sat in P3. Piper. Phoebe. And Billie. When did this happen? That one scene, single-handedly, ruined Charmed for me. Where was Paige? Why is Billie there? She pops up out of nowhere and suddenly gets to sit with Piper and Phoebe in the VIP lounge for what reason? I was sickened. I'm really missing the Power of Three. Paige is off on her own for most of the episode and that last scene makes it apparent that she's on the verge of being completely phased out and Billie has taken her place. It just really annoys me!
Speaking of Billie, she was absolutely awful throughout this hour. The scene in the lecture hall was shocking. Why do people like a character who acts like a hypocritical, arrogant bitch to her professor? What sort of college would allow a student to be that rude in a lecture? She would be thrown out immediately!
And don't even get me started on the hooker outfit she wore! I burst out laughing when she was walking down the street and a guy called out "superhero!" If I saw some blonde bimbo walking down the street in that, I would shout out "Cheap prostitute! Look guys, a cheap prostitute!" Kaley Cuoco was appalling in almost every one of her scenes. Every line she delivers is awfully spoken and it's almost like the script pages are stuck to the camera as she's too dumb to remember what she has to say!
Other bad stuff in this episode includes the cheap effects. When Billie was going all psycho in the crystal cage thing in the attic, it had to be the most obvious green screen I had ever seen on Charmed! The demon of the week sucked as well. Did anybody else notice though that it was the same actress playing her that played Klea, one of the Brotherhood of the Thorn, back in season three? It should have been the same demon, as that would have made more sense. When are we going to get interesting monsters again though? Next week's episode looks hopeful with the hulked-out sisters who actually look like demons but I'm not going to get my hopes up.
Paige gets a new love interest and he's much more interesting than Dex. And Brody. And Richard. And Les. And Jason. But, why should I get excited about somebody who'll doubtlessly leave in 6 episodes? Phoebe acted like a complete brat throughout the episode. She, of all people, says "it's always about [Piper and Paige]". Hello, you swallow up most of the storylines each season! Who the hell do you think you are! Sorry about Paige worrying about a charge and Piper worrying about the money that pays for the upkeep of the manor when, of course, Phoebe's desperate attempts to get a new groin buddy MUST take center stage! Spoilt whore! The P3 problems came out of nowhere. Weren't they really successful only three episodes ago with the speed dating thing? And if they were so unsuccessful, how could they get Liz Phair to perform? Also, how bad has Liz Phair gotten?
The best thing (well, only good thing) about this episode was Piper and Leo. Holly and Brian sparkle with chemistry and their scenes together were hilarious. It's just so sad to know that the only redeeming feature about Charmed will be over in two weeks.
This episode was the worst season eight hour so far, with terrible acting, awful writing and scenes which just go to prove that Charmed has now become a departed corpse with a Brad Kern-shaped monster selfishly trying to keep it alive.