-
Zahn (to Larry, after reshackling his wrists and ankles): Consider yourself repossessed!
-
Leo: What is that? Is that a time portal...is that what that is? What are you using it for?
Chris: I don't have to answer that.
Leo: I thought you said you had nothing to hide.
Chris: I don't have to answer that either.
-
Phoebe: A date? Really? Does he know about Wyatt?
Piper: No, and he's not gonna anytime soon. At least not till after the honeymoon.
-
Phoebe (about Spencer Ricks): Ick! Look at that pig. Eh, and I don't mean literally. At least not anymore.
-
Phoebe: I've surrendered to being the middle sister.
-
Phoebe: Piper, how did you have time to book Steadman in your club? Between raising my nephew and trying to date and vanquishing...
Piper (sarcastically): A sister?
-
Piper: What the hell is going on?
Paige: Bitch later, vanquish now.
Piper and Phoebe turn around and throw potions at Zahn, vanquishing him. They then turn back to Paige.
Phoebe: I love watching lawyers explode.
Paige smiles.
Piper (angrily): Now can I bitch?
-
A female demon throws an energy ball at Phoebe, but she channels her powers and reverses the energy ball, vanquishing the demon.
Piper: Way to channel.
-
A swirl of lights bring Phoebe and Paige to the underground auction house.
Female Demon: More Charmed Ones.
Grimlock: One hundred for all three.
Piper: Sold, to the dead Grimlock. (she blows him up.)
-
Wyatt "orbs" his eyes at Richard.
Richard: Does he do that a lot?
Phoebe and Piper look at Wyatt.
Phoebe: Uhh!
Wyatt's eyes stop orbing.
Piper: Wyatt?
Phoebe: What is he doing? Why is he doing that?
Piper (realizing): Apparently, he's trying to scare away all of my dates. You little runt. Did your father teach you that?
Phoebe: Okay, so not the time.
Piper: Right. (to Wyatt) You're grounded.
Piper hands Wyatt over to Phoebe.
Phoebe: Okay, back to Paige.
-
Phoebe (about Paige): You don't think Zahn, uh...
Piper: I don't know, but if he didn't, I will.
-
Leo (Gratefully): Thanks for not listening to me.
Chris: Anytime.
-
Leo: If one of us gets caught, the other one needs to keep going, for Wyatt's sake.
Chris: Oh, you believe me about him now?
Leo: No. I just want to let you know what's gonna happen if you get caught.
-
Phoebe throws a potion at Spencer Ricks, turning him into a pig.
Phoebe (Unsympathetically): Must have been the wrong potion.
-
Chris (about the dinosaur): I think he's gone. He looks gone. Do you think he's gone?
Leo: No.
Chris: Neither do I.
-
Chris (to Leo): Man, you are old.
-
Piper (Suspiciously): What's going on?
Paige: Oh, you know, just, uh... summoning a ghost.
-
Phoebe is talking to Spencer Ricks, with an amber coloured potion hidden in her hand. She looks at it longingly.
Spencer: Let me ask you a question. Do you ever get letters from anybody other than a bunch of whiny chicks?
Phoebe throws the potion at Spencer Ricks, turning him into a turkey. Phoebe looks at the turkey, thinking for a moment. She rolls her eyes and tosses another potion at the turkey, turning it back into Spencer Ricks.
Phoebe (annoyed): As you were saying?
-
Phoebe: Okay, first of all, get your feet off my desk, and, secondly, get out of my chair.
Spencer Ricks: Aww, and here I thought we were gonna be friends.
-
Phoebe (To Piper): You know, not getting any is making you bitter.
Piper (Gesturing to Wyatt): Hel-lo. Hi. Excuse me. Do you mind?
Phoebe: Oh, he doesn't know what we're talking about. He's ten months old. He thinks we're talking about milk, for God sakes.
Piper: Phoebe, he conjured a dragon. I wouldn't put anything past him.
Phoebe: That's a good point.
-
Phoebe (Talking about doing a column with Spencer Ricks): I have half a mind to call Jason and complain about it, but I don't want to use our relationship for leverage.
Piper: What's the use of sleeping with your boss then?
Phoebe: Because I actually enjoy sleeping with my boss.
Piper: Yeah, don't brag.
-
Piper: You need a hand?
Phoebe: Uh, sure, if you wanna go get my car washed, go to the dry cleaners for me, and go to work for me, too. That would be great.
Piper: Only if you can run the club, go to the dentist and raise Wyatt for me.