Cheers

Carla: All the kids were there so I figured it wouldn't hurt to ask them if anyone would fulfill their grandmother's dying wish and change their name to Benito Mussolini. Sam: Any takers? Carla: No, but I got two Madonnas and a MC Hammer.

Frasier: Very often that's the best thing you can do when you're not getting along with a family member. Remove yourself entirely from them. Find some neutral place where you can take the time you need to be away from them. Norm: You really think so, Frase? Frasier: Well that's why we're all here, isn't it?

(Carla refuses to rename her child Benito Mussolini) Mama Lozupone: I don't see why one Fascist dictator should ruin it for the entire family.

Sam: What's the matter, hon? Carla: Oh Sammy. It's this stupid family tradition. Since the beginning of time every woman in our family who has children...(glares at sister) has named one of her sons with the first name of her father and the maiden name of her mother, and I just wouldn't do it. Sam: I don't mean to take your mother's side here, but what's the bid deal? It's just a name. Carla: Yeah sure. Just a name. Sam: What was your father's first name? Carla: Benito. Sam: And your mother's maiden name? Carla: Mussolini.

Mama Lozupone: Angeline? Carla: No mama. It's Carla. Mama Lozupone: Oh, my purse is on the dresser.

Sal: You guys want a beer? Carla: This is kind of a solemn occasion, Sal. Sal: Malt liquor? Carla: I'll pass.

Carla: The last time I saw my mother, we had this terrible fight about this stupid family thing, and I swore I would never set foot in her lousy place again unless someone dragged me there kicking and screaming. Sam: So that's it, huh? Carla: You're damn right. Drag me, Sammy.

Frasier: Carla, death is an earthly scientific passage predicted by either massive physical injury or progressive bodily deterioration. There is as little validity in a supposed death dream as there is in the cliched image of death itself as a grim bloodless ghoul who's bony finger reaches out to tap you on the shoulder when your number's up. Lilith: (taps Frasier's shoulder) Frasier, it's time to go. Frasier: (Screams) Don't do that, woman. Put on some blush.

Norm: Carla, what's the problem? Why are you so upset? Carla: I hate family meetings. They're nothing but a bunch of complaining, infighting, bickering, and backstabbing. Of course sweet little Carla has to play the peacemaker.

Woody: I just thought it would attract new customers to the bar. Sam: Yeah, a bunch of deadbeats and freeloaders. Norm: Yeah, you don't want people like that in here. Another beer please, Woody.

Woody: Hey Sam, the new Boston Merchants' Coupon Book is out and I got us in it. Sam: Oh, damn it, Woody. I hate that thing. Woody: Maybe you don't understand how it works. Sam: Yeah I do. A guy comes in, gives you a coupon, you give him a free drink, he leaves, you never see him again. Woody: Well, then you do understand.