Norm: I can't go on with this any longer. I wanted to be your decorator so I pretended to be who I thought you wanted me to be but it's time I came out of the closet. I'm straight.
Norm: Ever since I was a little boy I've known that I prefer girls. But the point is I think you should judge people for what they do not for who they do.
Lilith: You should be decorating professionally.
Norm: Doing you folks a favor is one thing. Anymore of this interior decorating junk could really eat into my reputation as a lazy, beer-guzzling lump of mashed potatoes.
Frasier: But Norm, you have a gift.
Norm: A gift? Try a curse, pal. I spent my whole damn life trying to cover up the fact that I have a great sense of color and I always know where to put the ottoman.
Frasier: I never thought our wedding picture lived there. Where should it go, Ivan?
Ivan: Here's a spot. (throws picture in trash)
Lilith: Perfect, why clutter a home with mementos?
Sam: You know you've been wearing a lot of fat clothes recently, haven't you?
Rebecca: Oh just shut up butthead!
Sam: She called me a butthead and I think I'm gonna cry.
Woody: Don't worry, Sam. It only looks that way from the back.
Norm: Did I tell you that last night I programmed myself to dream about your space?
Robert: We took you into our home, trusted you, and this is how you repay us?
Norm: I can do it for half price.
Robert: Here's the key. There's Perrier in the refrigerator. If the neighbors see you, tell them you're the plumber.
(After Norm has Sam pretend to be gay)
Sam: No, I like babes, babes, babes! (He walks away)
Norm: That's his pet word for linebackers.
George DelHoyo (Robert Cooperman) was credited as George Deloy.
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