Brian Regan: Peanut butter and jelly in the same jar. I don't understand that. I mean, I'm lazy but I'd like to meet the guy that needs that. This guy must be thinking, "I could go for a sandwich, but I'm not gonna open TWO jars. I can't be opening and closing all kinds of jars and cleaning WHO KNOWS how many knives."
Brian Regan: (talking about Pop Tarts) It says microwave on high in three seconds. If you're waking up and eating in 3 seconds, you need a change of lifestyle.
Brian Regan: (talking about Pop Tarts) The toaster directions are more than one step.
Brian Regan: I don't know what's up with cranberries, but they're getting in all the other juices. Hey you got apple let's make it cran-apple go 50-50. You got grape cran-grape, you got pork chops cran-chops. Settle down there cranberry man, take you salesman trophy and take a vacation.
This episode ranked #19 in Comedy Central's 2005 Stand-Up Showdown Countdown.
This episode ranked #14 in Comedy Central's 2006 Stand-Up Showdown Countdown.
S 15 : Ep 422
Aired 4/22/10
S 15 : Ep 421
Aired 5/6/10
S 15 : Ep 420
Aired 4/8/10
S 15 : Ep 418
Aired 5/6/10
User Score: 407
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