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(Becca tells her Mom that Mike spread rumors about her in school)
Mackenzie: Do you want me to talk to the boy's parents?
Rebecca: Oh, no, Mom, that would just make it worse.
Mackenzie: Okay. Do you want me to have him arrested under the Patriot Act and ship him off to prison in Syria?
Rebecca: Now that sounds good.
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Mackenzie: People make mistakes when they're young.
Templeton: But if they go into politics, those mistakes can come back to haunt them. You know what they say, it's a contact sport, wear a cup. Well, I don't know, whatever you'd wear, a--a chest protector or whatever.
Mackenzie: (as she turns on the video for Templeton to see) You may want to put on a cup for this.
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Jim: I just want to make sure that our chain of command here is clear.
Rod: Well, maybe if you worried less about your own turf here and more about what's right for the President--
Jim: Oh, I learned a long time ago, never cross anyone who sleeps with the boss.
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Mackenzie: What do you think?
Rod: Are you asking my opinion on the record or off the record?
Mackenzie: What does that mean?
Rod: It means you said you were going to offer me a legitimate role in your administration, and instead, you're asking me to be secretary of pillow talk.
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Mackenzie: (grumbling that her youngest has interrupted an intimate moment with her husband) POTUS interuptus.