Complete Savages

It's Sunday morning and for the Salvage family gets ready for TV Church! They learn that there will be a Church Carnival later that night and plan to go, but unfortunately T.J. has to stay back because he has to do a report on Abraham Lincoln. Sam decides to ask Angela out to go with him since he knows that her English boyfriend had just broken up with him. Meanwhile, Jack and Chris create their plan to save money on girls. They decide go to the carnival with girls that have eaten and are already in the carnival.

At Angela's house, when Sam asks her to go to the carnival, he finds out that she wants them to only be friends. Even though he feels rejected, he still agrees to take her to the carnival, only has friends. Back at the Savage home, T.J. stalls to do his report but Nick doesn't let him get away with it. Later, while Kyle is picking through garbage for left over food, Jack and Chris find girls that have eaten already to save themselves some money. However, when they ask them to go to the "Tunnel of Love", the girls decide that they want a balloon first and the guys don't mind that. Next, When Sam and Angela arrive, Sam offers to pay for her ticket, but she doesn't let him because they are just friends and that drives Sam crazy.

Back at home, while feeding the Savage Dog pretzels, T.J. finishes his 2000 word report, but accidentally throws his memory stick onto the table and the Savage Dog mistakes it for a pretzel and eats it. Back at the carnival, Kyle gets in trouble with the security guard because he was caught putting his hand in a cotton candy machine. Meanwhile, just when Jack, Chris and their dates are headed to the "Tunnel of Love", Jack's date wants him to buy more food for her and Chris has to win his date a pink monkey by throwing a football in a hole, but is forced to keep playing because he has not leveled up to the big toys. So he has to keep playing until he can trade in his smaller prizes for bigger ones which will ultimately get him the pink monkey. While Sam keeps playing the friend card by not sharing his food or doing boyish things around her, Jack comes over and sees that Sam is looking desperate. So when Angela leaves to get herself a drink, Jack tells Sam to go take Angela in "The Zipper" ride so that she gets scared and would be holding onto him. Back at home, T.J. keeps spinning the Savage Dog around in a chair so he can throw up his memory stick. Nick doesn't believe T.J.'s "The dog ate my homework" excuse, but T.J. argues that he did the report so he should get to go to the carnival. An annoyed Nick tells him he should go because he is tired of caring for T.J.'s grades and he should do whatever he wants. Back at the carnival, a desperate Sam convinces a scared Angela go on "The Zipper". Meanwhile, Kyle gets taken to the back behind "The Zipper" by security guard with a warning to say out of trouble. Just when Kyle is about to leave, he sees a Do Not Push sign but then it turns into a Push sign in his eyes. Back at the Savage house, Nick sees that T.J. stayed at home and is trying to get the Savage Dog to poop out his memory stick so he can prove his innocence. When Nick sees this, he believes his story and offers to take him to the carnival so they can get a chili dog for the Savage Dog (because that will make him take a dump faster) and enjoy the rest of the festivities. Back at the carnival, Sam tries a lot of tactics that will make Angela more scared while they are riding "The Zipper". Meanwhile, Chris is down to his last dime and has to throw one more football into the hole in order to win the monkey. Meanwhile, Kyle keeps getting tempted to press the Do Not Push button, especially when he starts to hear voices telling him to. Just as Chris throws the football, Kyle gets ready to press the button and gets distracted from the security guard calling him and a football comes out of nowhere and hits the button. This causes "The Zipper" to halt and that leaves Sam and Angela panicked and forces Kyle to run away.

Stuck in the air, Sam tells Angela try to figure out what is going on but when Sam sees Kyle running away, he figures that they are stuck. Sam then confesses about why he made her go one the ride and that he likes her and doesn't them to just be friends. When the ride starts again, the two kiss and are now girlfriend/boyfriend. After the carnival is over, Sam brags about his new girlfriend while Chris and Jack are out of luck since Chris' date went for the balloon seller since he made her a monkey balloon and Jack's date threw up. Nick, with T.J., comes in with a pink monkey and other stuffed animals and Chris is devastated to find out he got them at the end of the carnival because they were throwing those things away. As T.J. gets ready to search for memory stick, Kyle comes running in warning his family not to tell a security guard he lives there. After that Sam brags again about his girlfriend and that causes Chris and Jack to hold him down and beat him with the monkey.