Complete Savages

Season 1 Episode 9

My Two Sons

Aired Friday 8:30 PM Nov 19, 2004 on ABC
out of 10
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Episode Summary

My Two Sons
Tired of Nick hanging around the house all the time, the boys decide to put him on an internet dating service. At a fancy restaurant, the boys attempt to pawn him off on the five women they thought were the best. However, Nick learns about what they have done and doesn't like it. Feeling uncomfortable being around the internet women, he goes to a nearby bar and meets a woman who he hits it off with. While getting to know her, he discovers that she is the type of woman who'd like to have a husband, house, two kids and a dog and Nick does tell her about his house, his dog, and his two kids, Sam and T.J.moreless

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    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (7)

      • T.J.: Wow, there's so many dating sites.
        Kyle: Why am I wasting my time with school dances when I can get a beautiful Malaysian woman mailed to my front door?

      • (Looking at women's pictures)
        Chris: This one has bigger biceps than dad.
        T.J.: Yeah but she drives a cool car
        Jack: A transgender's not a car.

      • Sam: So, what do I gotta do to be a Man's Man, grow a beard?
        Angela: Can you?
        Sam: Sure. You want rugged? You got rugged, baby. (Looks at his hand) Oh great, I left my mittens at the doll show.
        (His brothers look at him)
        Sam: What a terrible time to remember that.

      • Sam: You guys are missing the obvious, what dad needs is a woman. Every man needs a good woman. I mean, Angela's my rock; she's my shining light, my only reason for…
        Chris: You've been dating for a week.
        Jack: No, Sam makes a good point. If he can find a woman, anybody can.
        Sam: That's not what I said.
        Kyle: Yes it is.
        Jack: Well dad's not gonna meet anybody sitting on the couch.
        Chris: And the only women he meets at work are usually on fire.

      • Chris: What you watchin?
        Kyle: Bikini Space Patrol 2.
        Chris: Man, I haven't seen Bikini Space Patrol 1. I'm gonna be totally lost.
        Jack: See those girls in bikinis?
        Chris: Yeah.
        Jack: They patrol space.
        T.J.: Won't they get cold?
        Jack: They better.

      • Nick: So the fact that I only mentioned two of you doesn't mean I love the other three any less. Good night!
        Chris: Wait. You mentioned two of us specifically?
        Nick: Not specifically, randomly.
        Kyle: Well, which two?
        Nick: I think it was Sam and T.J.
        Chris: Sam and T.J. You randomly told her about the smart one and the cute one.
        Nick: Their names were shorter. I didn't want to drag it out with CCCChhhhrrrriiiissss and JJJJJaaaacccckkkk and..
        Kyle: Kyle?

      • Nick: She's not coming back. I should've just been straight with her.
        Kyle: It's our fault too dad. We should have just let you live out your dream of having two children.
        Nick: That's not my dream. My dream is to have five great kids: smart, cute, cool, athletic and Kyle.

    • NOTES (3)

    • ALLUSIONS (0)