Corner Gas

Hank: Hey, Brent! I was driving the ball-picker-upper at the driving range and I had one of those... um, ...uh... Oh, what do you call them? Brent: Hot dogs? Hank: No, epiphanies! Brent: That was my second guess. Wait a minute, you got a job driving the ball retriever? Hank: Job? You can get paid, driving that thing?

Davis: There's this police conference coming up, and they want me to give a talk. Brent: What's the subject? Napping?

(after hearing Emma and Oscar arguing, then finding out the cause) Lacey: This is about bridge? Emma: Stop being nosey! Lacey: Thoughtful. Emma: 'Thoughtful' would be trying to help me find a new partner. Lacey: Emma, I... you and Oscar have a lot invested in this marriage. Emma: A new bridge partner.

Brent: Did you ask Karen if you could help her? Wanda: Well, I got to thinking, there's a slight chance I could come across as a know-it-all. Brent: Really. Wanda: So I'm going to manipulate Karen into asking for help, by showing her how much I know about psychology. Brent: I see. So your plan to not come across as a know-it-all is to act like a know-it-all. It's quite the twisteroo.

Wanda: It's called 'Stroop Interference.' Named after the guy who came up with it. Karen: Oh, so what's happening here could be called 'Wanda Interference.'

(what Oscar says) Oscar: The dummy is when you put the cards down and your partner plays the hand. So what you should do is fix the bidding so you're never the declarer. (what Lacey hears) Oscar: A woodchuck would chuck all the wood he could chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood... dummy!

Wanda: Hey, Brent, you want to get in on a psychology test? Brent: I didn't know how to ask.

Davis: You know, I sometimes find myself in some pretty scarey situations. Maybe you can help the force. Hank: Like a superhero! Davis: Well... I'm just a cop doing my job. Hank: No, no, I meant me.

Wanda: You're manufacturing an excuse for not doing this. Karen: Yeah! I need to manufacture an excuse to not do this. I need to chicken out to show Davis I can't be bullied!

Lacey: But, Brent, you're the one who told me be direct! Brent: Sometimes I just make stuff up. Jeez, you think people would know that by now!

Lacey (about Oscar): Does he have to be here? Emma: I say that every morning when I wake up.