Corner Gas

Brent: Well, look, a gas station should be a little junky, it should have a little grease on the floor... or whatever that is by the cooler. Lacey: Don't you think your business could benefit from a little sprucing up? Brent: Jeez, what is that by the cooler? (walks over to cooler, off camera) Lacey: I'm serious. Brent (off camera): Doesn't smell like grease.

Lacey: I was wondering if I could put these flowers here. Brent: Why would we put flowers in a gas station? Lacey: Because it'll give the place a more welcoming feel. It's just a little thing; people will probably hardly even notice, but it will have a positive subconscious effect. Customer: Hey, flowers! Those for sale? Brent: No. Customer: That's stupid. (he leaves) Brent: Well, he seemed positive it was stupid.

Oscar: Hey, does Wanda know anything about plumbing, because... (he sees what Lacey's doing) Holy hell! What are you doing, taking down the 1977 Junior All Stars Hockey poster? Lacey: I am just hanging a few prints. Oscar: But that poster's been hanging there since 1977! (she takes it down) Holy hell! The 1976 Junior All Stars poster! Brent: That's where that thing went!

Oscar: Hi, Karen. How's your idiotic fund-raiser going? Karen: Ah, you were right, Oscar. Oscar (laughing): If I had a nickel for every time I heard that! Karen: You'd have... what? Five cents?

Brent (sniffing): What's that funk? Is something burning? Lacey: The incense. I just asked you if I could light incense. Eleven seconds ago. Brent: Oh, I wasn't really listening. These comic books require focus, you know.

Oscar: You sure you know what you're doing? Wanda: Don't I look like I know what I'm doing? Oscar: No. That's why I'm asking. Emma: Is your tool belt on upside down?

Davis: I'm not in denial. Hank: Denial of denial is the one of the first signs of denial.