Corner Gas

Brent (about Oscar): It's an odd request, getting him to work here for free. Wanda: You got me to work here for almost free. Brent: You almost work.

(Emma calls the police to complain about a jigsaw puzzle) Karen: Again, this is an emergency line. Is there at least a piece missing?

Oscar (to Wanda): Does this penny look round to you?

Oscar: I told you I don't want anything to do with your stupid time capsule. People in the future want to know about me, why don't they just ask me? Davis: We want to buy some liquid dish soap. Oscar: Licky disco?

Lacey: We're doing an experiment on Hank. Brent: Had to happen eventually.

Oscar: Why are all the gums sugar free? Brent: You tell me, Commies or hippies?

Oscar: I forgot about all the nut cases you meet on this job. Brent: Why? What happened? Oscar: Guy asked if we take Visa. I told him this wasn't the ballet, cash or Chargex. Brent: Visa used to be Chargex. They changed their name. Oscar: Since when? Brent: Well, I remember the Chargex company changed its name to Visa, and then I was born...

Wanda: Hey, Oscar. Boy, sure am busy around here. Too bad we don't have an extra set of hands to... Oscar: I'll help out, for free even. Wanda: Wow, I'm good. I should be a hostage negotiator.

Oscar: We have a giant Pepsi sign, doesn't mean we take Pepsi. Brent: It means we sell Pepsi.