Corner Gas

Lacey: Whoa, somebody wimped out on the pact! Hank: No, no, no, I painted my face green, see? Lacey: Yes. You did. And so did I, because we are real fans. Unlike Brent. Brent: I'm a fan! Look, that spearmint gum, green. These chips I'm eating got flecks of green stuff all over them. The washer fluid ... all right, that's blue, but if I put some lemon juice in there, green. Lacey: You use that lame excuse on St. Patrick's day too.

Karen: Mrs. Carmichael? It's Officer Karen Pelly. Mrs. Carmichael: I didn't know the watch was his... I can't see well. Karen: No, I'm here to read to you.

Emma: I brought you some leftovers from the Seniors' Home. Oscar: That place gives me the creeps. Bunch of old people sitting around, not doing anything, watching TV.

Davis: So how'd you like the CD? Wanda: Fantastic, blew my mind, no need to make another! Davis: Which was your favourite song? Wanda: Um... song two. I liked how it came right after the first one there, like, right after, and sort of slid into song three. Did not see that coming!

Brent: Dressing up doesn't make you a better fan! Until last week, Lacey thought the players went into a cuddle before each play. And Hank only wants to wear that green face paint for a month so he doesn't have to shower.

Wanda: Ta-da! (pulls a CD out from behind her back) Davis: Already? You didn't even ask me any questions. Wanda: Oh, I've been silently studying you for a long time. This CD has been years in the making. (cut to: Wanda at home in front of her computer) Wanda: Shuffle, burn, done!

Lacey: What are you supposed to be? Hank: I think he's the Jolly Green Giant. Brent: No, no, I'm 'Saska-Man'... it's a character I invented. I'm like you guys... go 'Riders! Hank: Are you mocking us? Brent: No, I'm not mocking you; I'm one of you. Lacey: No, you aren't. Are there mirrors on your planet?