Corner Gas

Karen: What do you need a telescope for anyway? Brent: It makes far away things seem closer.

Lacey: If the door is broken, you should do something about it. Brent: I've been working on it all morning. (he holds up a sign that says, "Watch The Door.") Lacey: Way to throw yourself at the problem.

Hank: I want to see that meteor shower. Wanda: Why does the concept of a shower suddenly interest you?

Lacey: It's coffee flavour, for your coffee. Brent: But coffee already tastes like coffee... like, a lot.

RV Owner: You'll love it... pulling up your roots, travelling around. My dad had a great time. Oscar: If it's so fun, how come he's not doing it now? RV Owner: He's dead. (silent pause) Oscar: Did he die in the RV? 'Cause then I want a discount!

Brent: This meteor thing, can it only be viewed inside the gas station? Wanda: I'm only leaving [the telescope] here 'cause my kid would wreck it. He'd tear this thing apart before you could say 'Copernicus'! Brent: Maybe not before I ~could~, but probably before I ~would~.

(Lacey is talking to a man; they are standing in front of a large truck with the words "Terry's Doors" on the side) Brent: You the door guy? Terry (looks at the truck): That's right. What seems to be the problem? Brent: It's the door. Terry: I'm the guy.

Lacey (to Hank): Oh, come on! Brent asking for help does not take away from his masculinity! Brent: Yeah! Lacey: It shows he's mature enough to subordinate himself to another, more capable, man. Brent: Where does that come from? Who's subordinate? Terry: Brent! (Brent immediately turns and heads towards Terry) Brent: Yes, sir?

Brent: I try to fix my own door, and I get emasculated! Wanda: Ouch! I told you it was dangerous. Brent: Metaphorically.

Wanda: Hey, Lacey, want to go to a meteor shower? Lacey: Do I have to buy a present? Wanda: Never mind.

Hank: Thanks for showing me, Wanda. Wanda: Actually, it was kind of cool having someone to watch this with. Hank (looking confused): I don't get it. That barely even sounds mean. Wanda: And if you tell anyone, I'll gut you like a fish.