Librarian: Would you ladies like to say something?
Jules: I didn't prepare anything. But... (To class) I grew up in the hood, ya'll. My best friend JoJo got shot in the face. It should've been me. But reading got me out.
Courteney Cox's daughter Coco has a small cameo as a student in the class Jules volunteers at.
Travis: Calm down, this is my screw up. I'm gonna go apologize to Dad and fix it.
Jules: No, this is my bad. I'm gonna go apologize to him.
Grayson: Cool, wizard vs nerd! (In a wizard voice) "I'll strike you down with my spell!" (In a nerd voice) "No, science is the answer!
Bobby: Jules, embarrassing things happen to me a lot. What's the point in hiding from it? I just put a big smile on my face and say I chucked it, world, and I think it's funny, too. And next thing you know, boom! Pop culture phenom.
Random girl: Wrong balls!
Bobby: Call me! (To Jules) Now that I'm famous, my gold lessons are booked solid. I don't even have to buy my own drinks anymore.
Jules: You never did before.
Bobby: Yeah but now it's not stealing.
Bobby: You know how much I like meatball subs? Well, guess whose the new spokesperson at Mel's Hoagie Hut!
Jules: I can't believe this.
Bobby: Hey look, I know you biffed it with the kids yesterday.
Jules: Stupid blabby town!
Bobby: Just remember, you can't hear the world laughing at you if you're laughing harder. You gotta own it, sugar.
Laurie: Can I play?
Ellie: That'd be like taking candy from a baby. No, an animal baby.
Grayson: (Chuckling) You're so mean. I can't get over it.
Ellie: I know, right?
Jules: From this point forward, what happened at that school will not bother me.
Grayson: Attaboy, Richard!
Jules: (Hits Grayson) That will never be spoken of again. Which is why it will not bother me.
Andy: I volunteer at the shelter too. During the self-defense classes, the women take turns kicking me in the crotch.
Grayson: So it's like a regular day at home for you.
Laurie: Jules, I didn't know you sponsor an African child!
Jules: Oh yeah, little Omari. He's ten. I gotta say, those letters are getting a little repetitive; "It's hot, I'm hungry, there's snakes."
Jules: Now, do we know why we're here?
Grayson: Because we're always here?
Jules: Well, partly.
Bobby: You always did hate to be embarrassed, J-bird.
Jules: I'm weird that way.
Grayson: (To Ellie) Wanna team up? Form an alliance, like NATO?
Laurie: Isn't NATO the guy who lived in O.J.'s guesthouse?
Travis: This my fault.
Jules: Travis, blaming yourself for someone else's actions is ridiculous. Besides, I made this happen by wishing it so. I really abused my powers.
Ellie: You don't have any powers!
Jules: My psychic said you'd say that.
Ellie: Psychics are stupid.
Jules: She said you'd say that.
Ellie: Well, I can't win at this game!
Travis: I will not be mocked!
Grayson: (In a "Travis" voice)I will not be mocked!
Travis: Mom, they're mocking me!
Grayson: Mocking is bad!
Laurie: I went to a crap school in a crap neighborhood and reading really got me out.
Laurie: No, car modeling did. But it's really fun to say reading did.
Laurie: The L'army is gonna love that. That's my twitter name: The L'army. It stands for The Laurie's army.
Ellie: Good god. An army of jellybeans.
International Episode Titles:
Czech Republic: Jen počkej! (Just You Wait!)
After the opening scenes, the title says Welcome to Cougar Town. Follow @ TheLarmy right now and thanks us later.
Original International Air Dates:
Canada: April 27, 2011 on Citytv
United Kingdom: May 24, 2011 on Sky LIVING/Sky LIVING HD
Norway: December 13, 2011 on TVNorge
Czech Republic: January 20, 2012 on ČT1
Finland: August 28, 2012 on MTV3
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