CSI: Crime Scene Investigation Season 3 Episode 12

Warrick: So, Marty was telling the truth? It was just a coincidence that he owns poisonous snakes, and his co-worker was envenomated.
Grissom: A coincidence is a scientific anomaly. Maybe he just got rid of the snake.

Brass: You know, for an unemployed guy you're doing a lot of spending. I mean, (chuckles) ... Tiffany's, La Perla international watch company ... expecting a windfall?
Lawyer Don't answer that. (to Brass) You're fishing.
Brass: No, I do that with a pole. No, I'm just thinking out loud. Your wife disappears. Five years after the fact, you get the money. You've earned it, it's yours, but she screwed you up. She showed up.
Mr. Easton: I did not kill my wife.
Brass: What happened, Daniel? The sex wasn't as good as you remembered it, or the money was better? What happened?

Warrick: You know it's illegal in the state of Nevada to have venomous snakes?
Marty: If you handle them correctly, snakes are harmless. I know what I'm doing.
Grissom: Yeah, that's what we're afraid of.

Marty: You going to arrest me for blurring the lines?
Grissom: No. We were leaning towards murder.

Mr. Easton: You know, you were here five years ago with your grid searches, your dogs, your cadets -- you came up empty. You give me a good reason why my wife left me, I'd love to hear it, because I tried the truth. I didn't know what happened. You know what I got for it? They all think I killed my wife. Her parents sued me for custody. I lost my job, my friends. Only thing I got left are those kids and this house.
Catherine: Okay, you didn't kill her. (beat) At least back then.

Sara: Well, she wasn't in town on business.
Nick: What's that? (Nick looks up. Sara turns around and holds the black teddy in front of her. She clicks her tongue and shakes the teddy in front of her) Oh! Depends on what her business was, I guess.

Warrick: You ever buy a brand-new car, Griss?
Grissom: Depreciation doesn't make it a logical investment.
Warrick: It's not about logic. It's about that smell. There's nothing like the smell of a brand-new car.

Doc Robbins: An artificial spinal disc. If you can recreate a spine the possibilities are endless.
Catherine: I thought, uh, disc replacement surgery involved fusing bone to bone.
Doc Robbins: Eh, typically, but it can limit mobility. With that little disc, your body doesn't know the difference. Matches range of motion, flexibility and an axial rotation of a normal spine. Still in clinical trials. Less than a thousand surgeries have been performed in this country.
Catherine: Oh, well, I like those odds.
Doc Robbins: You'll like this even better. Medium endplate, size 12, polyethylene component and a six-degree lordosis angle. Narrowed it down to one. Amy Ennis. Austin, Texas.
Catherine: Tourist?
Doc Robbins (chuckles): That's for you to find out.

Catherine (about the vic): What kind of identifying characteristics do we have?
Doc Robbins: Second degree midline episiotomy scar.
Catherine: Well, that narrows it down to more than half the women in this country who gave birth.
Doc Robbins: But there might be one other thing. At first I thought appendectomy, but check out her x-ray. She's had surgery. Some kind of implant at the L4-L5 interspace. I'll know more when I open her up.
Catherine: You're my hero, Al.

Sara: Cans are on private property, it's not trash day, how did you get consent?
Catherine: I talked to the president of the owner's association.
Nick: What'd you threaten her with?
Catherine: A return visit.

Catherine: Heard you got to be superhero today.
Doc Robbins: I consider myself a superhero every day.

Sara (at a garbage dump): You know the average Nevadan generates three times more waste than the average American?
Nick: Yeah, well that's tourist trash.
Sara: Thirteen million pounds per day. I went to the recycling forum in March.
Catherine: The landfill manager says this is the active cell. Spotter says cell lift moves forward 20 feet a day. That puts the active cell right ... pretty much in front of us.
Nick: Man! You find the best evidence in the nastiest places.
Catherine: You are what you throw away.
Sara: It's like peeling an onion in peoples' lives.
Catherine: Well, this onion is our time line so peel back accordingly.

(About Marty, the car dealer)
Warrick: He's a charmer...
Grissom (laughs): Yeah, a regular Ricky Roma.

Clyde: Look, everyone tries to get an edge in this business. I use jokes.
Warrick (hangs up the phone): Fred Sterns just passed away. Again.
Grissom: Dead guy. Not funny.

Warrick: Hey, I hear David's resurrecting the dead now.
Grissom (chuckles): Yeah, our little miracle worker.

(after David has performed an autopsy on a living man, who later passes on)
Doc Robbins: Alright David, take two.

Sara: She's a virgin?! So what are we talking here immaculate conception?
Catherine: More like the immaculate perception. Pseudocyesis -- imagined pregnancy.
Sara: It's all in her head? Well, that would explain what she was doing in dad's bed.
Catherine: Fantasizing.