Captain Jim Brass
Goof: When Grissom first opens the knife with sand in it, there is no blood at all. However, he later looks at it and almost all the part from which the sand got out of the knife is covered in blood.
Goof: Catherine says that the ulna is one of the strongest bones in the body when it is in fact quite weak. If nothing else, the radial bone next to it is stronger.
Catherine: It's like that Morrissey album - Meat is Murder ...
In actuality, Meat Is Murder is an album by Morrissey's ex-band, The Smiths.
Grissom: Did you know that to a geologist there's no such thing as sand? Each grain is its own tiny rock. Fine, glassy crystals ... dark. Obsidian, I bet.
Catherine: Volcanic sand. Long way from home.
Grissom: Japanese call it singing sand. If you walk on certain beaches in Japan it'll make a musical sound.
Catherine: Never been to Japan, but I've seen this sand before ... on the blood clot. (Grissom looks at the knife hole where he finds some blood)
Grissom: Well. "Let us carve him as a dish fit for the gods."
Catherine: I'm going to guess Shakespeare.
Grissom: Julius Caesar.
Hodges: Wools are worsted. 12-ounce weight.
Grissom: That's heavy?
Hodges: Light ... weave. Mostly for season spanners.
Grissom: We're talking about clothes?
Hodges: Worsted is predominately used in the manufacturing of suits and light overcoats. The finish on this is trademark coating in high-end suits.
Grissom: Okay, good. Thanks. (turns to leave)
Hodges: Mmm. I'm not done. There was also blood present on the burnt wool.
Grissom: Did we get a DNA test?
Hodges: It's victim's blood, from your chef. I know what you're thinking. Couldn't possibly be his suit. Chefs wear checks and white shirts. But somebody did burn a bloody suit in the restaurant kitchen. A high-end suit. (beat) You have a candidate.
Grissom: You're the new guy.
Hodges: Yeah. Uh, David Hodges. Transferred from LAPD. (scoffs) They said I had an attitude problem. Said that I thought I was entitled.
Grissom: We're going to need to see all your knives. (to Chef Ross) Starting with yours.
Chef Ross: I need them back by the next shift.
Catherine: Well, that depends on what we find.
Grissom: Petrov Samsko. Non-gaming sheriff's permit, head chef, Debreff Restaurant. (he pronounces it "doo-breff") Chef-- that would explain the burn scar tissue on his palm.
Catherine: It's "Debreff." (pronounces it "dough-breff") It's a five-star restaurant. I've eaten there.
Grissom: Good, maybe you can get us a table.
Grissom: Tips of the fingers look like they're worn to the bone.
Doc Robbins: Can you get a partial?
Grissom (picks up a little bottle): Much more than that. Lansberry's Ridge Builder. One application to the bulbs of the fingers and the ridges plump out temporarily like a chia pet on steroids.
Sara: You know, you can tell a lot about a person about what they leave in their car. A rotten banana.
Warrick (laughs): Business suit.
Sara: We got a paycheck. Who would do that? (looks confused)
Warrick: Reminds of what my grandmother said a long time ago. I would never believe her.
Sara: What's that?
Warrick: Crazy people make even sane people act crazy.
Catherine: People always think that the show is out front. It wasn't 'til I waitressed I realized it's all in the back.
Grissom: Excuse me, Stephanie? Is this your uniform? (holds up a bag with shirt in it)
Chef Lola: Don't have to answer that, Steph. They don't have a warrant.
Grissom (to Catherine): I thought you said the mafia left town. (Cath laughs)
Brass: Ever wonder what's in that hot dog? Human body in a meat grinder. Shop foreman found an arm. The rest of him is prime grade A sirloin.
Catherine: Body in a meat grinder. Sounds kind of "mob-ish" except they left town in the '80s.
Warrick: Did someone move her?
Hank: She was propped up when we got here. I checked for vitals.
Warrick: You sure with all your life-saving efforts you didn't move her?
Hank: Hey, man, like I said, I checked for vitals.
Sara (to Hank): It's okay, baby. (everyone stares at her)
Greg: Did you know that some doctors believe that oral bacteria have no other benefits than to make it impossible for other more vicious bacteria to take up residence in our mouths?
Grissom: I knew that, Greg.
Greg: So, then I should just stop trying to impress you.
Grissom: That would impress me.
Greg: Okay. Well, results from the fight bite boy. I had to get it from an outside lab since we're not equipped to do bacterial DNA testing ourselves. Hint, hint.
(looking at the meat grinder the arm is caught in)
Grissom: We're gonna have to dismantle this piece by piece.
Grissom: I'll get a foreman.
Catherine: I think I can handle this.
Grissom: You know about meat grinders?
Catherine: Well, everything's pretty much plumbing. Male into female parts. Righty tighty, lefty loosey. (Grissom just looks at her as she starts to take it apart)
Les Dutton: Are you sure it's Petrov?
Catherine: Coroner made a positive identification.
Les Dutton: What makes you think that this event happened here?
Catherine: We found traces of aspic and olive oil under his fingernails. Means that he went into the meat grinder without showering. Possibly straight from this kitchen.
Les Dutton: If there was a murder in our kitchen don't you think that, uh ... I'd know about it?
Catherine: I don't know. Would you?
Grissom (looking around the kitchen): Hey, Cath. Blood spatter.
Les Dutton: It's a kitchen. Chefs use knives. It's not uncommon. You are...
Grissom: Gil Grissom. I'm with her. (points to Catherine)
Sara: Hey, you get something on that glass?
Hodges: Didn't beep you to say "hi".
Sara: Glad to see you're settling in, Hodges.
Chef Ross: 20 guys are into me for recreational substances. That doesn't mean they'd cut up a body for me.
Catherine: Ground it up. We're thinking you did the actual filleting.
Chef Ross (laughs): Never happened. Ask any of the guys.
Catherine: We have. They won't talk. Military calls it "code red." Fierce loyalty to the top dog. I guess Petrov was that until somebody killed him. (Grissom finds something and takes a sample of it and holds it) His tragedy is your promotion?
Les Dutton: Excuse me. We're in the middle of a rush here. Customers don't forgive a cold meal or a late meal.
Catherine: I'd bet they'd forgive a murder, Les.
Grissom: Hey, do you guys serve mutton?
Les Dutton: What?
Grissom: Mutton. It's from the french word for sheep. These fibers look like wool and since sheep are sheered before they're butchered I think that somebody was cooking something here, and it wasn't food.
Catherine (looks at Chef Ross): Code red?
Nick: Fresh off an airplane from a conference, and bamm -- I got seminal fluid.
Caatherine: Lucky you. (smiles) Some things never change.
Nick: What's that?
Catherine (still smiling): Cocaine.
Chef Lola: Chefs here have a ritual. Macho thing. If you get cut, it's tradition that you disperse maximum spillage.
Chef Ross: That's how everyone got blood on themselves.
Grissom (to Catherine): Haven't these people ever heard of HIV?
Catherine: Apparently not.
(After they cleared the murder at the resturant)
Catherine: All in a days work.
Grissom: Yeah, you up for dinner?
(At a crime scene where a hand is in a meat grinder)
Grissom: Looks like the elbow got stuck in the blade. (puts on his gloves) Yup, the ulna.
Catherine: One of the strongest bones in the body. Probably what jammed this grinder.
Grissom: Possibly why whoever did this didn't finish the job. (he tries to take the arm out, and can't)
Catherine: It's like that Morrissey album - "Meat is Murder" ...
Grissom (is still trying to get the arm out): I'm gonna need a hand.
Catherine: Blood, coke, and semen. These people were doing everything in this kitchen but cooking.
(Grissom and Willows enter a restaurant to investigate the death of one of its chefs. The hostess stops answering a very busy phone and turns to them)
Hostess: Hi, last name?
Grissom: We don't have reservation. We're here---
Hostess (taking back the phone): Party of four? Three weeks from Thursday? Let me see...
Catherine: Excuse me but you don't understand---
Hostess (holding up the phone): No, I'm sorry you don't understand. You're walk-in's in a very busy night. We're short a chef.
Catherine: We know. He's dead.
Grissom: Not only dead. Dismembered. We're with the crime lab.
Hostess (putting down the phone): I'll get the owner.
This episode is ripped from the headlines of Anthony Bourdain's autobiography "Kitchen Confidential", such as the flicking of blood around the kitchen after cutting oneself and the phrase "don't touch my knife, don't touch my johnson". The notion of someone being murdered in the kitchen and a chef butchering the corpse for disposal had previously been featured in Bourdain's first novel "Bone in the Throat".
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