CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

Warrick: Did you touch or move the body in any way? Blinky: Uh, no way. No. I watch those murder shows, you know? I know to just keep my hands to myself, and, uh, call the cops. Sofia: What is with the robe? (Warrick looks to the officer standing nearby) Warrick: Did you pat him down? Officer: He's packing a small, friendly weapon. Warrick: Would you mind standing up for us, sir? Blinky: Nah, bro, I-I-I ... kind of got the angle of the dangle going. The boing, boing, boing. Sofia: Stand up. (Blinky stands up, uncomfortably) Blinky: I, uh, took a Prevalis on the plane over. I been pitching a tent for, like, eight hours. Yeah, I-I think I need to consult a physician. Sofia: It's called a priapism. Just in case you were wondering. Warrick: What else you on, man? Blinky: Oh, uh, nothing. I mean, uh, I smoked a little herb at the club, but that's it. Warrick: What about Julian? Blinky: Oh, Jules? Oh, no, he, uh ... he won't even take aspirin. You know, he's organic. You know, treats his body like a temple. Sofia: Well, we're gonna need a list of everyone who was here worshipping the temple.

Warrick (seeing Hodges looking through a microscope): Hodges, do you have the results on the fibers that we dropped off to ... ? (Warrick notices that Hodges is sleeping) Hodges? (Hodges doesn't move. Warrick looks at Nick) Dude, he's sleeping. (they both laugh) Nick (loud): Lemme guess! ... (Hodges startles awake) ... The fibers are wool. Are you baggin' Z's right now, man? Hodges: I was just having the greatest dream. Warrick: You were out. Hodges: It was the 80's and I had this Don Johnson beard, you know, the Miami Vice stubble. It just gave me this air of danger. My lady loved it.

(On the phone, as Grissom's walking some where) Catherine: Catherine. Grissom: It's Gil. How you doing? Catherine: I'm busy. You checkin' up on me? Grissom: Now, why would I need to do that? Catherine: I don't know, you tell me. Grissom: Look, I know you tend to get a little territorial about your crime scenes and I don't want there to be any tension between us so I'm giving you fair warning. (he walks up to her crime scene) Catherine (annoyed): Fair warning for what? Grissom: Hi. (Catherine looks up and sees him and he waves and smiles at her)

(They are walking up behind Greg who is in the DNA lab) Nick: I thought Greg was in the field, is he back in the lab? Warrick: I don't know. Nick: We gotta clear this up, it's like he's confused. Lab, field, field, lab. We have a lab on wheels. Greg: Would you guys just shut up? I'm doing this as a favor to Ecklie, it's a one time thing. He's still interviewing lab techs. Warrick: Are you making overtime? Greg: I'm taking one for the team.

Sara: Noy had a life insurance policy issued through his union worth 10 grand. Catherine (sighs): Life's getting cheaper.

Greg: Hey, I heard you guys are having trouble on the Julian Harper case. Warrick: Who'd you hear that from? Greg: Ecklie. He's putting me on it. Nick: Man, you gotta quit kissing his ass. (Warrick laughs)

Guy (about his employees): What kinda trouble are they in? Brass: The kind where you stop breathing.

Doc Robbins: Sounds like your double is becoming a triple. Catherine: Unless you got any more in your drawers?

Warrick: Sex, drugs, and movies. The American dream.

(In the victims hotel room, they found semen everywhere) Warrick (looking at a window): I've got smudges over here. (Nick looks at them, Warrick kneels down) I've got some footprints. I think someone was standing right there Nick: What, was this guy just doing it all over the hotel room? Warrick: If those are his foot prints, where are hers? Nick: Well, her feet were up and in the air. You tell me, you just had your honeymoon.

(Doc Robbins pulls out a camera at the crime scene and is about to take a picture of the victim) Warrick: What are you doin'? Doc Robbins: For my scrapbook. I've got a perfect spot for him: a place of honor between Tupac and Entwistle.

Hodges (yawning): Sorry! I just started seeing someone. Had a bit of a late night. Let me ask you something. How do you know when it's gone from just friends to more than that? Catherine: Well, if you have to ask, it's just friends. Hodges: She is making dinner for me this weekend. Catherine: Are you the only guest? Hodges: Do her roommates count?

Brass: So our interpreter is hiding something. Grissom: Well that's not lost in translation.

Grissom: Maybe he didn't die here. Maybe he just ended up here.

Nick: I've got semen on the bedsheets as well as every other flat surface in the place.

Nick: Isn't he supposed to be the next Brad Pitt? Warrick: Now he's the next River Phoenix.

Doc Robbins: If it wasn't for the cyanosis, I'd say he was doing a photo shoot for GQ. Warrick: Yeah, I'm sure he wasn't ready for this photo shoot.

(Grissom is walking from the crashed cab to where the crime scene started) Transportation Guy: Why's he leaving? Sara: Well, that's kind of what he does.

Kate Villa: I was in Julian's suite when he died? I am so getting into that club for sure.