CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

Grissom: You failed to report him missing for seven months because ... ? Rose Bennett: I don't like your tone, young man.

Sara: So, ladies of the wedding party, you get a free course in the forensics of sexual intercourse. Secrets of our trade. Lynn, when you had your exam for sexual assault a SART nurse makes a clock like this. (turns around and picks up a piece of chalk to illustrate on the blackboard) This is the vagina. It does tell a monologue. Some bruising is normal when sex occurs. Injuries at 11:00 ... 12:00 or 1:00 indicate consensual sex or what we would call "avid." Injuries around the dinner hour ... five, six, or seven, indicate forced entry. The woman hasn't done anything to help her partner thus sustaining serious bruising. Sgt. O'Riley: Sidle, I'm going to be just outside the door. Sara: Okay, O'Riley. Lynn ... your exam showed no evidence of sex in the last 48 hours. Actually, in months. (Joyce snickers quietly) But the epithelials indicate that Darren had sex right before he died and the coroner puts time of death when you've all admitted to being present. So... Meg? Joyce? (they are all silent) Look, we can run the clock exam on each of you. And the clock is going to tell us what happened. So who wants to go first? Meg: I had sex with Darren ... and it wasn't rape.

Catherine: So, are you thinking what I'm thinking? Grissom: How amazing the universe is. Everything made from the same carbon, stars to trees, trucks to human bones. Catherine: Uh, no, I was thinking that we have about 100 bone fragments. We could ID this body before the end of the shift. Grissom: Hmm. Catherine: Stars and trucks?

(They may have found a piece of bone and Grissom sticks it in his mouth) Catherine (alarmed): What are you doing? Grissom: Bones are porous. They stick to the tongue (puts piece in mouth again) and this doesn't stick. (puts it back down) It's a piece of rock. Catherine: I-I hope you had your hepatitis B shot. (Grissom gets up and starts searching for more bones, Catherine follows) Did you? (Cuts to Grissom and Catherine walking toward a cadet, who may have found a piece of bone) Grissom: Could be a piece of wrist bone. Catherine: Well, do you want to suck on it... to be sure?

(About a bone that was found in the desert) Catherine: Well, it is a leg bone and my guess is that it didn't walk out here by itself. Grissom: It could have been a hiker who got lost. It's interesting to me how you always expect the worst. Catherine: You see, that way I'm never disappointed. And sometimes I'm nicely surprised. So, is this a crime scene? Grissom: Potential crime scene. Did you know there are 206 bones in the human body? Catherine: Yes professor. I, too, took osteology. Grissom: Well, 205 more bones and we have a complete skelton. If we find the rest then we can determine if or if not it was a murder. Catherine: Well, I feel it in everyone of my 206 bones that this was a murder.

Greg: Skeletal muscle of Mel Bennett. It goes in... contents come out. In 30 seconds.. bioassay. I like saying that word. Bioassay. Sounds nubian.

Grissom (trying to reconstruct the skeleton): "All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty back together again."

Warrick: Who's the room registered to? (the officer hands Sara the registration slip. She looks at it) Sara: Well, you know, that would be Celine Dion.

(Picks up bone pieces) Grissom: I'll take toe bones for $200, Alex.

(Piecing together a skelton) Catherine: That is correct...according to this book.

Grissom: You bring in a specialist without my approval? Catherine: What? And you don't bring one in, possibly compromise the case because you two had a relationship? Grissom: Relationship? I hardly know that woman. Catherine: Oh, so I guess that dopey look in your eye whenever she's around is just that.

Teri (to Grissom): Well you are the bug guy.

(When Grissom puts his ear up to the pile of bones on the table) Catherine: Are the bones whispering to you?

Grissom: What's next? Teri Miller: Mutilation in the Everglades. Grissom: Maybe it was just an alligator.

Brass: How'd you guys do? Catherine: We found blood in the drain. Grissom: You find anything? Brass: Just the murder weapon.

Teri Miller: It's kind of like that old saying: 'How a person does one thing is... Grissom:... how a person does everything.'