Curb Your Enthusiasm

Jeff: So you have to decide between whether you want Daddy, or Oscar. Sammy: Mmm...Oscar! Jeff: No, no. Whay I'm saying is, that if you say Oscar, Daddy won't be here. Sammy: I know. Jeff: You know? Sammy: (nodding) Mmhum Jeff: But you're choosing Oscar. I'm your Dad. Sammy: I just love that dog.

Larry: You know me, I don't like to complain.

Susan: You going to thank me too? Cheryl: And thank you Susan Susan: You're welcome (looks to Larry) Larry: What? Why do I have to thank you? Susan: For dinner, that my husband and I treated you to. Larry: Oh, I thought he treated me to it. Susan: Stu pulled out the credit card and put it down, yes. Larry: Yeah, so I thanked him Susan: And he's using our money to pay for it, so you could thank us. We're taking you out to dinner. Larry: Well, you could call it "our money," but just for the sake of discussion, he's the one who goes to work and earns the money. You don't work.

Larry: (seeing Stu taste wine) He's like an elephant sticking his head in a pond.

Bald Chef: You have to wear a hat if you're gonna be in a convertible, then you look like you're trying to hide something. Larry: Well, that's what they do, these guys with the hats. Don't they? Bald Chef: Yeah, Yeah! Larry: They wear it all the time and they'll meet a girl or something, then they'll show up on a date. What are they gonna do? Are they gonna take the hat off? Wear it? They have a terrible decision. Bald Chef: Right, then the girl is going to be like, "I didn't know you were bald." Larry: Yeah, "You misrepresented yourself!"

Larry: What do you say? Braudy kids: Thank you! Larry: You're welcome! (Larry rubs Susan Braudy's nose in his refusal to thank her)

Larry: Hamster? Put him in a cage and you can torture him a little bit? Sammy: They're boring. Larry: But you torture them. It's not boring if you torture them.

Jeff: You really love that dog. Larry: It's nice to be affectionate to something German. You don't get the opportunity that often, you know.