Dallas

Cliff: Oh, do you think I care about that tape? I don't care about that tape! Look, so I got lucky from some bimbo. It's not like I'm married, I'm out there foolin' around. McKay: That may be. But how do you think it would look if the word got out that you were sleeping with the wife of the head of Weststar? Cliff: Well, you're not married. I mean... McKay: I'd like you to read this. It saddens me to tell you that the young lady who co-starred with you in that film has been, for three days now, Mrs. Carter McKay.

McKay: But you are the good guy, Cliff. The public loves you. I see you every night on the news. You're hot stuff. As a matter of fact, I have a tape of your last performance. I was rather impressed by it. (McKay plays a tape of Cliff and Rose in bed together having sex) Cliff: What the Hell is that?! McKay: "A Night in the Life of Cliff Barnes."

J.R.: You know what your problem is, James? You're just too much like me.

Cally: J.R. ran Alex out of Dallas. Lucy: I'm surprised that's all he did. You mean to tell me there weren't any broken bones—no death threats?

Sly: Why does everybody around here always blame everything on J.R.? Phyllis: Oh, because usually it's his fault.

Cliff: Would you like to have dinner with me? Rose: Oh, I really would. But there's this wonderful movie on the hotel TV... a real love story. I was just gonna order room service and watch it. Cliff: Shoot. Rose: If you'd like, we could watch it together... if you promise not to behave yourself. Cliff: You have my word on it. Rose: Mmm-hmm, then let's hurry and finish these drinks. I wouldn't want to miss a minute of it. Cliff: It's a long movie? Rose: Sugar, it's as long as we want it to be.

J.R.: I told you this is strictly business. That woman doesn't mean a damn thing to me. James, when you get a little older, you'll understand that there are things you have to do that are above and beyond what you learned in business school.

James: [Diana]'s a real barracuda. J.R.: (chuckling) Fortunately.

Diana: If Cliff Barnes has anything to do with it, you and your brother will be hanging from the highest yardarm with the Queen's Navy. J.R.: Oh, he's tried before, but always failed. Diana: Did he have public opinion behind him before? J.R.: No, but the man is a genius at snatching defeat from the jaws of victory... especially with a little help from my friends.

J.R.: As hard as it may be for you to believe, it wasn't all my fault. Lucy: That's not hard to believe... it's impossible.