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(on the death of Uncle Pete)
Ellen: I don't know, but she blames you guys. This is like a call to war for her.
Agent Werner: Meaning what?
Ellen: Meaning you're not just targeting her now. She's targeting you.
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Katie: You are a terrible pool player.
Wes: Maybe that's just what I want you to think. The hustle began hours ago. You just didn't notice it.
Katie: Is that so?
Wes: First I invite myself to girls' night out. I throw a game or two, and before you know it, the gouging starts and you lose your shirts.
Katie: I can't wait. (pockets a ball)
Wes: Or maybe I am just a terrible pool player.
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Agent Werner: We don't work for the FBI, Ellen.
Ellen: Who do you work for?
Agent Werner: The IPF.
Ellen: The what?
Agent Harrison: Inter-Planetary Federation. You never saw Men in Black?
Ellen: Oh, you guys are jackasses.
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Patty: I will give you protection, and I'll put in a good word with your family court judge.
Lonnie Samble: And if I don't talk to you?
Patty: Family courts don't take kindly to mothers who are prostitutes. It would be a shame if they found out.
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Well Dressed Man: I'm going in for a simple hernia surgery next week.
Roger Kastle: Oh, yeah, they're all simple until they're not.
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Patty: Phil makes the mistake of believing that man is inherently good.
Phil: No, I believe that man is inherently self-interested, and the only way to keep self-interest in check is through free market competition.
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Patty: This investigation is corrupt, and when I prove it, your career will be over.
Don McGraff: You don't want to threaten me.
Patty: I don't make threats, Mr. McGraff. This is war.