Jane Lane, Helen Morgendorffer, Quinn Morgendorffer
Kevin Thompson, Anthony DeMartino, Timothy O'Neill
Ms. Angela Li
When young Daria is at the psychologist she is asked what she see's in the black and white picture, the psychologist mentions that one child might see a firetruck or a house and another might see beautiful wild ponies running free across the plain, which is Daria's answer to what she see's in a similar painting in her interview on her first day of Lawndale High.
The SUV's cell phone rings as Daria hangs up after talking to Mrs. Sloane.
(Daria and Quinn are dragging a refrigerator box to the curb)
Quinn: Daria! I'm near the perspiring point!
Helen: Your father was in a job he hated with a sadistic boss--
Jake: Lousy mini-Mussolini!
Jake: Tense, Daria. I was very tense.
Daria: I like to read.
Psychologist: Don't you enjoy playing with the other children?
Daria: Not really. They never understand what I'm talking about, and then they make fun of me. (pause) I like to read.
Jane: All I hear is the rustle of the gentle breeze wafting through cardboard. Quite soothing, really.
Daria: You're right. It is soothing.
Jane: I was kidding.
Daria: At age six I decide I don't need to talk to other kids ever again. My parents are the ones who get called in to school. At twelve I decide to try out some Shakespearean insults on my teachers. My parents are the ones who get called in to school. At fifteen I start writing violent revenge fantasies just to get a reaction...
Jane: Your parents, etc. etc. Gotcha.
Quinn: It was very traumatic. The scars are with me to this day! (pause) Do we have any diet soda?
Announcer: They gave her a good-bye party at 65... miles per second! Retirement by rocket next, on "Sick, Sad World".
Daria: Now over here is the lunch room. As middle school veterans, you already know this is the center for spitballs, laughing milk up through your nose and food poisoning of every variety.
Jane: Who here wants to slip me a twenty to point out the popular table so you can start fighting for a seat now?
Daria: Okay, let's move onto Hell and Purgatory, also known as the gym and the locker rooms.
Jane: Where for twenty bucks I'll show you which showers haven't been peed in. To my knowledge.
Daria: My friend is just kidding you, of course. They've all been peed in. Now as we head for the gym take special note of the fine industrial grade lockers which make the perfect noise when you bang your head against them.
Quinn: Oh, hi, Dad. How was the band-aid conference?
Jake: Branding, it was a branding conference.
Quinn: Branding! Oh no, those poor cows.
Ms. Li: (over school speakers) Attention Lawndale High students! It has come to my attention that during our all important trail mix fund drive week, some individuals have been flaunting outside snacks from non-school affiliated sources. Now students, the booster club, leadership club, chess club, dominoes club, football, basketball, lacrosse and marbles teams, as well as the brotherhood of future marketing and promotion executives need your help. I'm afraid I'll have to institute snack spot checks. I'm sorry young people, but you abused your privelages.
Daria: I hate this school.
Jane: That reminds me, I need some chocolate. Unauthorized chocolate. (laughs sadistically)
Tom: I mean, if I'd had any idea that you'd end up in a horrific multi-car crackup, whispering my name over and over in a desperate bid not to slip into a coma...
Daria: Horrific crackup? I spun out on the shoulder.
Tom: You tell it your way, I'll tell it mine.
Helen: Daria, you can't spend the rest of your life in there.
Daria: I can once they put in my high-speed Internet connection.
Jane: Daria? Come on, the neighbors are starting to talk.
Daria: Um... good. Soon they'll progress to cave drawings and civilization will be on its way.
Jane: Well, you spoke the truth. It's a box, all right.
Daria: It's more than a box.
Jane: Um, from here it looks like exactly a box.
Mr. O'Neill: Maybe you and Jane want to give some tours together!
Jane: I'd do it. (Daria stops and stares at Jane) Hey, if I'm giving a tour then I can't be in class. Simple physics.
Kevin: Now, the next stop on our tour is the lunchroom. Who here knows what people do in the lunchroom?
(Quinn has to drag the refrigerator box to the curb a second time)
Quinn: (muttering) Stupid freakin' carton...hard freakin' labor...I'm only freakin' human! How much can one freakin' girl take? Even an enormously freakin' popular one...
Helen: Oh, isn't that ridiculous? They carted off that heavy, old refrigerator and left the cardboard box. Well, it's light. You and your sister can move it out to the curb for the trash collectors.
Daria: Isn't that sort of brute donkey work the reason they made fathers?
Helen: Daria, I'm surprised at you being so traditional.
Daria: I'm not being traditional. I'm being lazy.
Helen: This says the different vegetable bins have individual thermostats.
Quinn: That means I can have celery stalks at one temperature for their optimum crispness, and carrot sticks at another for theirs!
Daria: Just make sure they never touch, or kablooey!
Tom: I'm worried. I don't think you can really do without me for a week.
Daria: No, you should worry that once I remember what it's like not to have you cramping my style, I'll want to make it permanent.
Mr. O'Neill: Darn it, Daria, this is an opportunity to polish up those people skills. I promised myself I'd get you to do this.
Mr. O'Neill: Because I care.
Daria: Then you need to work on your callousness skills.
Daria: Did I tell you Tom's going away for a week?
Jane: To "the cove?"
Daria: How'd you know?
Jane: That's the only place his family ever goes. I think they're training a secret militia up there.
Daria: I wish. That's so much more exciting than them just being too damn cheap to go anywhere interesting.
Jane: Hey, how do you think old money gets old?
Helen: Oh, I agree. There's nothing funny about food poisoning.
Daria: Unless someone else gets it. Then it's frivolity city.
-Nine Days - "Absolutely (Story of a Girl)" (closing credits)
-St. Germain - "Rose Rouge" (Daria saves box from trash)
-Echo & The Bunnymen - "It's All Right" (1st commercial bumper)
-Our Lady Peace - "Life" (2nd commercial bumper)
-Orbital - "The Box" (Daria shows Jane the box)
-Oasis - "Who Feels Love?" (Tom drives Daria to school)
This episode is available as a bonus feature on the Daria "Is it College Yet?" DVD.
Given Daria's estimate of four hours, and assuming a speed of 55 to 65 miles per hour, "the cove" is probably about 200-250 miles from Lawndale
Due to its sensitive subject matter, this episode never aired on The N.
The book that little Daria was reading while hiding in the box was Black Beauty by Anna Sewell.
Though it's never mentioned, Daria's childhood home could possibly be their house in Highland (of Beavis and Butt-head fame, where Daria was first introduced).
Daria's distress at being pegged the school misfit recalls her unwanted status as "the misery chick" in "The Misery Chick" (#113).
Mom's Diner was the same place that Daria, Jane, Trent, and Jesse stopped at on the way to Alternapalooza in "Road Worrier" (#111).
The series comes full circle with the child psychiatrist's phrase -- "a herd of beautiful wild ponies running free across the plains" -- having been used by Daria while taking Mrs. Manson's psychological test in "Esteemsters" (#101).
"If nominated, I will not run; if elected, I will not serve" was William Tecumseh Sherman's response when the Republican party attempted to nominate him as their presidential candidate in 1884. As a Union Army general, Sherman is best known for his devastating march through Georgia and South Carolina during the closing months of the Civil War.
Announcer: ...retirement at 65...miles per hour!
The reference to "retirement at 65" in the Sick, Sad World segment is a reference to the fact that this, the 65th episode, was the final regular episode of the series.
Title Pun: Boxing Daria
The title "Boxing Daria" alludes to the movie Boxing Helena; it may also refer to how Daria "boxed" in her feelings. The refrigerator box was a visualization of the barrier she created.
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