Jake: That wasn't me, that was the milk talking!
Daria: I came to this stupid place and pretended to be well adjusted, didn't I?
Daria: Well anyway, I came to this stupid place.
Helen: And Quinn, well...I can't even think about what happened there, not right now.
Doctor: Quinn, what do you think about what just happened?
Quinn: I think this spa would get a lot more business if you just offered facials.
Doctor: Helen, we're talking about Jake now. We'll get to your control issues soon.
Helen: "Control issues"?!
Daria: Mom's resentful that she has to work so hard, which obscures her guilt about actually wanting to work so hard. Dad's guilty about being less driven than mom, but thinks it's wrong to feel that way, so he hides behind a smokescreen of cluelessness. Quinn wears superficiality like a suit of armor, because she's afraid of looking inside and finding absolutely nothing. And I'm so defendant that I actively work to make people dislike me so I won't feel bad when they do. Can I go now?
Helen: Daria, can I make you breakfast?
(Daria gestures to the toaster)
Daria: Sure. Push the lever.
Eric: We want to get a look at Helen Morgendorffer wearing all three hats: wife, mother lawyer. And what we see may lead to hat number four: partner.
Helen: I hate the way I look in hats...
Jake: If I weren't stressed, I'd get stressed by everyone telling me I'm stressed!
Daria: (re: milk) Read the warning label: contains Tryptophane. Highly relaxing. Do not combine with high school.
Helen: Daria's not crazy...she just has an eccentric sense of humor!
Daria: Don't listen to her! She's one of the "Gamma" people!
(While filling out the test)
Daria: "If you were an animal would you rather be an a) cat, b) dog or c)rabbit?"
Jane: A bat!
Daria: But it's not an option.
Jane: Put it down anyway.
Daria: "Write a brief statement explaining why."
Jane: I always wanted to sleep upside down and spread rabies.
Doctor: Why don't you try wearing each other's faces?
Quinn: Eww! Like that guy did to that other guy in that movie?
Daria: Can I do the surgery?
Doctor: No, no, no. I'm talking about a little role-playing.
Daria: I'll play the role of the crazed surgeon. Scalpel?
Helen: Everybody hates me.
Quinn: Are you being Daria now?
Doctor: Why don't you be Daria?
Quinn: Oh, God, just throw me in front of a train, why don't you.
Doctor: Oh come on, it can't be that bad. Give it a try.
Quinn: I just did.
Daria: I am not suicidal.
Doctor: All right, Daria. Now can you be Quinn?
Daria: Okay, now I'm suicidal.
Doctor: We think it might be best to put her under a little thing we call "intensive observation".
Quinn: About time.
Jake: Wait a minute! There's nothing wrong with Daria.
Quinn: Yeah. She's always like this.
Quinn: Where's Jean Michel?
Daria: I think he's showing some ink blots to Marc Antony.
Helen: Excuse me, but what's going on here?
Doctor: We analyzed your daughter's questionnaire and, well, we're a little concerned.
Helen: (reading) Favorite pastime. Changing water into wine?
Daria: I knew I should have gone with the burning bush.
Quinn: A spa? Great, I need a facial so bad.
Daria: Don't get excited. This says it's a spa for the soul. Didn't you sell yours a while back?
Mrs. Johansson: Maybe I do use food for comfort, but at least a chocolate bar never told me I was an accident!
Doctor: What did the chocolate bar say to you?
Helen: Quinn, this is about family togetherness. We get to have fun while I get to show I'm partner material.
Daria: I see, we're being graded on our family life. Gee, look at the time: 1984 already!
Doctor: Do you always talk to the computer, Daria?
Daria: Only when the refridgerator's mad at me.
Daria: I guess I'll make my own breakfast
(pushes lever on toaster)
Daria: Now I'm too tired to eat.
-Foo Fighters - "Headwires" (closing credits)
-The Propellerheads, featuring Miss Shirley Bassey - "History Repeating" (Daria & Jane fill out questionnaire & 1st commercial bumper)
-Godsmack - "Keep Away" (Helen's office)
-DMX - "Ruff Ryder's Anthem" (Daria watching JaneCam @ spa)
-Macy Gray - "I Try" (Daria and Jane reflect on JaneCam and its demise)
When Quinn interprets the "wearing each other's faces" suggestion as the plot of a movie, she's thinking of Face/Off. The movie starred Nicholas Cage and John Travolta, and the characters underwent surgery to wear each other's face to deceive those closest to their enemy.
Daria: Uh oh. Four flew into the cuckoo's nest.
This is a play on the 1962 novel One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest by Ken Kesey, which takes place in an insane asylum. The novel was also adapted into a popular film starring Jack Nicholson.
Daria: Gee, look at the time: 1984 already!
Daria is referring to the famous book 1984 by George Orwell, where people were under constant scrutiny by an all-powerful political party and executed if they didn't live up to the party's ideals (no individual thought, no love except for the party itself and it's leader, Big Brother, etc.)