Dave the Barbarian

Dave: Lula, I know I couldn't get you out before, but now there is a sponge bath on the line!

Man: Sir, do you remember the muffin monster? Sprite: Naw, I came in after that scene.

Fang: You want foul? How about I bat your head into foul territory?

Sprite: I don't write the rules, I just enforce them. Dave: But your name is on the rule book.

Salesman: T-shirts! Get your "I Tried and Failed" t-shirts!

Dave: Is there anything in the enchanted forest that isn't enchanted? Sprite: Well, maybe that one rock over there. Rock: Nope, me too.

Dave: Time to cut a muffin! Lula: That sounds nasty for some reason.

Candy: A giant muffin! Gee, why do I have to be princess of like the weirdest kingdom ever?

Narrator: And the muffin top provided bouncy fun for all! Except for little Billy because he was bad.

Lula: That sounds nasty for some reason.

Fang: I love a happy ending. Candy: HAPPY ENDING?!?! They're going to destroy half a continent! Fang: Yeah, but not the half we live in! Candy: Good point. . .

Dave: Is the anything here that's not enchanted? Sprite: I think that one rock over there. Rock: Nope, me too! Sprite: Hey! I just enforce the rules I don't write 'em! Dave: But your names on the front cover. (Silence) Sprite: Heh.. Heh.. must be a typo.

Dave: I think I've seen some real progress here. Fang: What are you talking about! He's still wrecking everything! Dave: Yes, but now he knows why! So, who wants a cappuccino??!!!

(After Quasmir goes mad once again) Lula: Well Dave, we're back where we started. Dave: Don't be ridiculous. It's much worse now...

Dave: Okay, gang, time to cut a muffin! Lula: That sounds nasty for some reason... Dave: Halt you peselant pastry! I CAN'T ALLOW YOU TO MAINE, SLAUGHTER, AND DESTROY!! Without the proper permits...

(After his room was thrown) Oswidge: Hey, he threw my room! All my dollies are in there! (Everyone looks at him) Uh... I mean all my magic stuff!