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Josephine "Joey" Potter
Jennifer "Jen" Lindley
Pacey J. Witter
Jack McPhee (recurring Season 2)
Evelyn "Grams" Ryan
Ticket Taker #2
Pop band No Doubt guest star as themselves.
Eddie: What is it you want to be, little girl?
Joey: Hmph! I don't know. Guess I'm a work in progress.
(About her father)
Joey: He's a big fan of cheating on my mom. Um, he's definitely not the type to do some back-breaking job for 25 years when there's easy money to be made in the less law-abiding sectors of the economy.
Eddie: You make him sound like a criminal.
Joey: Well, that's what the district attorneys call him.
Todd: For the record, never let it be said that Todd Carr is a man who's not in love with being in love. I think both my movies and my life reflect my deep and abiding commitment to getting two good-looking young people together and having a bit of fun now and again. However... as Leery here bloody well knows...
Dawson: You're also a man who's in love with sleep.
(Dawson and Natasha start kissing at the police station after Todd has bailed them out)
Todd: Ok, shag wits, to the car! Let's go! Chop, bloody chop! Or am I gonna have to throw cold water on you both?
Jack: So, we're, uh, not doing too well at this, are we?
David: Well, the hanging out has been good. But the dating? I think it's safe to say that when two gay guys go on a date, and each ends up going home with a hot blond girl, something's definitely not working.
Jen: (To C.J.) If I ever got it into my head to do what you do, you know, to help people, I would be a hell of a lot better at it than you are.
(Jen has found out that C.J. and Audrey have slept together)
C.J.: This is bringing you a great deal of satisfaction, isn't it?
Jen: No, actually, it's not.
C.J.: You're not thinking to yourself right now that I deserve this?
Jen: No. You and Audrey are both adults, and I am not gonna sit here and apply some ridiculous double standard to the situation, just because my feelings got a little bit hurt.
Emma: (To Pacey about Audrey) Is it so difficult for you just to admit that she hurt you? Or that you might feel a little guilty about the way things ended, or that possibly, despite all your protestations to the contrary, that you still want to save this girl?
(About C.J. and Audrey)
Pacey: He took advantage of her! He saw that she was messed up and he preyed on her, which in my books makes him one notch below pond scum.
Emma: Right, right, must be that, because women are such helpless idiots they couldn't possibly make an informed decision about who they sleep with, could they?
Eddie: (To Joey) Things have to happen to you at the exact right time in your life, or they're meaningless.
Joey: Your dad seems nice.
Eddie: He said four words to you, and he thinks your name is Josie.
Joey: I don't mind.
Eddie: He is... nice. You know, he works hard, puts food on the table, doesn't cheat on my mom, solid, steady, always around.
Audrey: (To C.J.) People who are into helping other people are about 10,000 times more messed up than the people they're helping.
C.J.: I'm sorry. I'm not trying to mess with your head here. I just... I like you, Audrey, and you're the only reason I came here tonight.
C.J.: I need to talk to you.
Audrey: Well, I don't want to talk to you. Don't you get that? It was a mistake, a gigantic mistake.
C.J.: Why didn't you tell me you had a boyfriend?
Cop: You have several hundred dollars there, son.
Dawson: No... yeah, I do, but it's... it's not for that, it's for the...
Natasha: Me. It's for me. He was trying to short me, and I told him: no way. No way am I gonna do you in this parking lot for a penny less than $600.
Cop: What's this, some kind of game to you, miss?
(After finding out that Audrey and C.J. slept together)
Jen: You know, I've been holding back lately because I actually had some sympathy for you. I thought, Audrey... she's just confused. She's just messed up, but you're not. You're just sad.
Jen: I just wanted to tell you that I know about what happened with you and C.J.
Audrey: Jen... I didn't know that you liked him so much. Like, I thought that you did, but I...
Jen: I don't want to talk about this. I just wanted to let you know that I know.
Pacey: Well, excellent. Let's get in there, because I personally do not want to miss a single solitary second of...
Audrey: No Doubt. It's on the t-shirt.
Pacey: Right. No Doubt it is.
Audrey: It's not your responsibility to make me happy, Pacey. It's mine.
C.J.: I'm actually... interested in somebody else.
Jen: Oh. I see, so, all that stuff about not being ready to date... just applied to me.
C.J.: No, Jen, I meant all that. I did. I'm not ready to be serious with somebody. This other girl... kind of took me by surprise. It just kind of happened. I mean, we were at the wrong place at the wrong time, things escalated.
Jen: Did you sleep with this girl? (C.J. makes a face)
Jen: Wow, so, sleeping with people doesn't violate your moral code, but dating them does.
Jen: (To C.J.) You know, for two people who aren't seeing each other, we end up alone an awful lot of the time.
Eddie: That's the guy from the movie set.
Eddie: And the guy from the movie set is the friend who gave you the tickets.
Joey: Yeah, kind of.
Eddie: And now we're hiding. Why?
Joey: I don't know. Gut instinct.
Eddie: This is ridiculous.
Pacey: I did call you, you know.
Audrey: I know. At least I figured that I shouldn't talk to you until I hated you a little less.
(Jen tricks Pacey into a meet up with Audrey)
Pacey: You did not just do this to me.
Jen: Yeah, we did, but out of love. Trust me, when you look back on this event in a few years, you're going to be very grateful, because you will have done the mature thing.
Pacey: You posses the psychic ability to see into the future of relationships now?
Jen: Yes, just not my own.
Jen: (To Pacey) You're not going to regret this, I swear. You're here, you're not in a suit. This is good. This is very, very good.
Guy: Tickets. Tickets, please.
Joey: I have them. I do. I must have them.
Guy: That's what they all say.
Joey: No. I was leaving, I put them in my coat pocket, and... I wore my other coat.
Guy: A fashion tragedy. Next.
C.J.: Oh, so, what? You're just going to pretend like nothing ever happened?
Audrey: Yes, and unless you want me to kill you, you will, too.
C.J.: You know, we didn't do anything wrong.
Audrey: No, of course not. We were great, you know? And we'll probably win some sort of award for moral fortitude and the proper use of birth control.
Jen: (To C.J.) Look, I don't want to pretend that nothing happened between us, and... and I also don't want to make a big deal out of the... nothing that did happen between us.
Audrey: I want to hear that she has a pimple or something. I want there to be one tiny little chink in her armor of perfection. I mean, has that girl ever made a mistake? Ever?
Jen: Yeah, actually, the same one that you did. She dumped Pacey.
Audrey: That's funny. You know, the way I always heard it, he dumped her.
Jen: (To Audrey) We're using the gays as a barrier between the breeders and the bitter, single girls.
Audrey: (About Joey) I suppose mojo jojo will be attending.
Jen: Oh, come on, if you can... if you can be with her in that tiny little dorm room of yours, you're going to be just fine in a crowd of 14,000 strangers.
Jen: So, you're coming, right? I mean, if the band can overcome their complicated romantic entanglements and still be friends, the least that we can do is all get along for one night.
Audrey: All right, I am willing to grant that there is a certain karmic appropriateness to seeing one's ex-boyfriend for the first time at a No Doubt concert.
Todd: I get it. So all this friend-to-the-crew stuff was just an excuse to get the night off so you could take her to that concert?
Dawson: I'll split the money with you.
Todd: (Laughs) Not necessary. I already won 500 in the when-will- Dawson-and-Natasha-start- shagging-again pool.
Eddie: All your friends will be there.
Joey: Well, not all of them... ok, most.
Eddie: So how is that a date?
Joey: What makes it a date is that I'm there... and you're there. And if you play your cards right, you might just get a kiss at the end of the evening.
Dawson: Heard you and Audrey had a fight.
Joey: Yeah... those things happen, I guess. People fight.
Jen: Oh, you feel so bad 'cause you don't call, you got to give us presents.
Dawson: Just open it. It's not a guilt offering. I'd use it myself if I could.
Jen: (Opens it and pulls out a bunch of concert tickets) Oh, my god! These are tickets to the No Doubt concert. Dawson, this is amazing. There's like 10 tickets in here. Are you sure that this is ok?
Dawson: So let me get this straight, Pacey and Audrey broke up, but Joey and Audrey are fighting.
Jen: Yes, majorly. Dawson, you've got to call more often.
Pacey: You guys havin' a problem out here?
Audrey: No, we barely know each other.
C.J.: Yeah, right.
Pacey: Excuse me?
C.J.: Nothing, I just think if you took care of your girlfriend a little bit better...
Pacey: ... If I did what!?
Audrey: Nothing! He said nothing. Go away C.J.
C.J.: You really want me to leave you alone with this guy who makes you so miserable?
Audrey: Yes, now!
Pacey: Is this a joke? Did he really just say that to me?
Audrey: C.J. please, if what you said was true about me, about the other night, then you would just leave, walk away.
Pacey: Wait, what about the other night?
C.J.: And if I don't?
Audrey: C.J. leave! Now!
C.J.: You really think you're gonna be happier with him than you obviously were with me?
Music featured in the episode included:
I Can't Let You Go by Love Candy
Right Here by Fine Machine
Say It Twice by Choo Choo La Rouge
Peek by Anna Waronker
Supergirl by Gina Young
Fall by Lake Boone
Just A Boy (For Now) by Nemochrome
Every Song On The Radio by Pillbox
Hella Good by No Doubt
Underneath It All by No Doubt
Magic's In The Makeup by No Doubt
Beautiful by Josh Zandman
Joey: Well, my dad... when he actually was around was very good on the encouragement part in that 'dream-big, little-girl, you-can-be-anything you-want-to-be' sort of way.
This is an allusion to this previous quote of the same episode:
Eddie: He is...nice. You know, he works hard, puts food on the table, doesn't cheat on my mom, solid, steady, always around (...)he is just not too big on the encouragement front.
C.J.: The reason you came home with me the other night is because you're so overwhelmingly happy with him.
Audrey: Please, if what you said was true about me, about the other night, then you will just leave, walk away.
These are allusions to 6x07 Ego tripping at the gates of hell.
Natasha: Oh, my god, it's Black Beauty.
Black Beauty is a 1994 film adaptation of Anna Sewell's novel of the same name.
Joey: I'm pretty sure Freddy Krueger's second home is right around the corner.
Freddy Krueger is the lead character in the A Nightmare on Elm Street series of films.
Audrey: Seriously, we might be lost. I think we should've left like a trail of popcorn or something.
This is an allusion to Perrault's tale Tom Thumb.
Girl: (To Dawson) Wrong night, Romeo.
Romeo is the male lead character in Shakespeare's play Romeo and Juliet.
Jen: Look, I don't want to pretend that nothing happened between us, and... and I also don't want to make a big deal out of the... nothing that did happen between us.
This is an allusion to episode 6x07 Ego tripping at the gates of hell where Jen tried to kiss C.J. but he turned her down.
Jen: If the band can overcome their complicated romantic entanglements and still be friends, the least that we can do is all get along for one night.
This is an allusion to the romantic affairs that Gwen Stefani, the leader of the band, has had with several of the band members.
Eddie: I've already gotten a kiss. Two, actually.
This is an allusion to the episodes 6x04 Instant Karma! and 6x06 Living dead girl where Joey kisses Eddie.
Jen: Oh, my god! These are tickets to the No Doubt concert.
No Doubt is a Californian band founded in 1986.
The episode title Spiderwebs is the name of a No Doubt song featured on their album Tragic Kingdom.
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