Deadwood Season 2 Episode 12

Swearengen: You smell like cat piss.
Commissioner Jarry: I have worked so hard and diligently for you Mr. Swearengen. That well may be the case.

(talking about Mose)
Joanie: He asked for work here.
Jane: As what?
Joanie: Watchman's what he suggested.
Jane: We're a vacant structure in case he ain't ****** noticed.
Joanie: I think he shrinks from leaving.
Jane: And the word for that is malingering.

Swearengen: Going to the wedding Davey?
Davey: Not hardly Mr. Swearengen. I wasn't invited.
Swearengen: I was, not that I'm going. Vicious rumors I was responsible for her first husband's death. ******* woman invites me to her wedding.
Davey: Guess there's no accounting for why people do things.
Swearengen: The congregation says Amen, Davey.

Sol: What can't you do?
Ellsworth: Any of it feels like. These ******* mittens in particular. Traditional, the ******* tailor says. Well not in my experience they ain't. If I was to imagine where they might be, amongst males about to marry, it ain't what comes to my mind.

Nuttall: Ellsworth and the widow Garret. What odds would you have made on that.
Swearengen: Every so often, there's a love match.

Hearst: (seeing Farnum) Looks like he stepped out of a specimen box.

George Hearst: Do you know prospecting Mr. Swearengen?
Al Swearengen: Nothing of it...
George Hearst: And the securing of the color once found...
Al Swearengen: Not one thing...
George Hearst: All I really care about.
Al Swearengen: Well I hope so... I'd hate to think you're this good at something that's only a hobby.

E.B.: Allow me a moment's silence Mr. Hearst, sir. I am having a digestive crisis and must focus on supressing its expression.