Degrassi: The Next Generation Forums

I've got some ideas for motivational posters:

Peter and Emma. Caption: "Peter. Because Emma established herself as a total moron on Day One."

Peter and Sean. Caption: "Imitation. It's the sincerest source of slash fiction."

That old gamer girl who tried to molest Connor. Caption: "Swampass. Tap, Dark Ritual, Hypnotic Specter, GG?" (Thank you, TV Tropes and floormate who plays Magic and explained it.)

KC and the coach. Caption: "Threeway Shota. Get rid of the coach, and this would be the most awesome thing ever."

Spinner and the lighter. Caption: "Stupidity. Because when Jay's the voice of reason, you know you're in trouble."

Mia at any point. Caption: "Mary Sue. Because guys are just dying to date you."

The scene with Rick, Sean, Emma, and Toby. Caption: "Season four. It means 'death' in Japanese."

Any others you can think of?

Sean and Ellie. Caption: "Retcon. In the Special Edition, they never did it."

Toby being a dork. Caption: "Toby. Even less of a meme than Milhouse."

i made this picture a couple months ago.

Connor's blog:

Earlier this month, I came home drunk and made a World of Warcraft character. What the hell, I thought. I have no life, I'm single, and everybody's doing it. Sure, I heard some stories, but what was the worst that could happen?

Two weeks into my online gaming experience, World of Warcraft had sucked me in. It was like hanging out in the online equivalent of Comic-Con. Every time I signed on, I was hit by a barrage of nerdy messages: "kirk could beat picard's ass", "luca$ should not be allowed to edit his movies", "so how does the helm of reverse alignment work again?", "she'd look great with cthulhu's tentacles all up in her". So when I saw an IM from a girl that said "You should go out with me. " I was relieved. She seemed normal. I gave him my name. "Google away," I said. Then dinner was ready, and I signed off without remembering to do the same.

We met for a drink later that week. We started talking about normal stuff—family, work, college, that sort of thing. Then we mentioned World of Warcraft.

"Actually," she said. "My elf shaman's only at level 10."

I laughed. Oh that's a funny joke! I thought. This girl is funny! But the earnest look on her face told me she wasn't kidding.

At dinner I got straight down to it. How often did she play? "A few hours a week." Strike one! What events has she taken part in? "None really, I don't have the time." Strike two! Don't have the time? Really? In an era when people are less than a decade away from implanting computers with internet connections directly in the brain? Who did she hang out with? "I've met most of my friends through WoW." Strike three!

Maybe I'm being shallow for judging her based on WoW. I'll own that. But there's a larger point here: It's human nature to judge people on shallow things. One man's low-level WoW character is another man's nail biting, or sports obsession. or verbal tic, ~desu. No online profile is comprehensive enough to highlight every person's peccadillo, or anticipate the inane biases that each of us lugs around.

What did I learn? Google the **** out of your next online date. Like, hardcore.