Desperate Housewives

"Martha Huber waited her whole life for something to happen to her, something exciting. As a child she hoped to be kidnapped by a band of pirates (a little girl is looking through the window holding her teddy bear), as a teenager she dreamt of being discovered by a Hollywood talent scout (a teenage girl is brushing her hair in front of the mirror), as a young woman, she fantasized a handsome millionaire would sweep her off her feet (a woman is cleaning the window). But the years had flown by and still nothing exciting had ever happened to Martha Huber (we see the night she returned from the grocery shopping and Paul gives her a helping hand) until the night she was murdered. In those last moments, it occurred to her in addition to being boring (Paul is strangling her) life could also be very cruel. Luckily for Mrs. Huber death was far more merciful (A policeman is looking at Martha's missing paper)"

They dug up the body and detective identified Martha Huber. News reporters are already on the Crime Scene and detective tells to the policeman that he makes sure that no one contaminates his crime scene. The policeman sits by Martha and says hi to her and tells her that a lot of people are looking for her and her face is going to be on the front page of every magazine. Isn't that exciting he wants to know.

"Officer Jackson couldn't be sure but for a brief moment he thought he saw the corpse of Martha Huber smile."



"Death had come once again to Wisteria Lane (police detectives come to Felicia who is watering Martha's lawn and they tell her the bad news and Felicia is shocked). Word of a tragedy would soon spread throughout the neighborhood but for now people went about their lives as they always did…blissfully unaware (Susan goes over to Mike's place)"

She tells him that she finished her book and they can go out and celebrate. Edie is in the house and Mike tells her that he is helping Edie about her house. Edie informs them that her insurance is finally cutting her check next week and there is only one plumber she wants. Susan starts going but she gives kiss to Mike…and they start kissing really passionately and Edie tells them that she is on the clock. Her cell rings and it is Felicia. Edie is in shock and she tells them that they found Martha's body.



Lynette is with Penny and Parker in the yoga center and she looks at the day care paper and it is full but she signs Parker as the thirteenth. Lauren tells her that the day care center is full and Lynette tells her that every time she comes here it is always full. Lauren tells her that it is a popular and other mom come early and she tells Lynette to plan ahead next time. Lynette tells her that she is a mother of four kids, and tells her that she had to wake up at 5, make lunches, make breakfast, drop the twins off to school and get across town lugging a baby and a sick child with her (Parker has a cold) and she tells her that when someone tells her to plan ahead it is the same like telling her to sprout wings and because of those things she is so freaked out and only yoga can relax her and when she finally arrives the girl tells her to plan ahead. Lynette tells her that it is a vicious circle. Lauren tells her that she gets it but if she breaks the rule she will have to break it for the other moms and the moms who followed the rules will all get pissed at her and before she knows it she won't have time to read her magazine (Lauren is holding a magazine). Lynette tells her that she hopes that someday she will have lots and lots of children. Susan calls Lynette and tells her about Martha.



George drops Bree off to her house. Bree looks at the window but she sees the curtains only. She tells him that she had a lovely time and he opens his trunk and gives the box to Bree. He asks her for dinner tomorrow and she again looks at the window and sees that Rex is watching and she gives George a hug and tells him that she will love it. She tells him that she can't invite him in for coffee and George tells her that he gets it. George goes away and Bree starts going to her house. Her cell rings and it is Lynette who tells her about Martha.



Carlos is back home. Gabrielle awaits him in front of the house with the bottle of champagne and two glasses. Carlos is in the house and Gabrielle wants to make a toast. She tells him that it is a cheap thing but now he is back they can restock the wine cellar. She sees some device next to phone and she wants to know what that is. Carlos has something around his leg and he tells her that it is his electronic monitoring device because he is on house arrest and that is the condition to his bail. She is pissed off because he forgot tell her that and he tells her that if he moves a hundred feet from the phone an alarm goes off and if he keeps on going it sends signal to FBI and he is back in jail. Gabrielle wants to know how is he going to work and he tells her that he can't do anything. Carlos tells her that the lawyer is working on unfreezing some accounts and he tells her that she will have to model again. She tells him that this is not New York where she earned 10 000$ a day but now she is doing boat shows and she is spending eight hours a day smiling and showing boats. Carlos tells her that he would buy two boats from her. They make a toast and the phone rings. It is Bree and she tells Gabrielle about Martha.



Detective tells Felicia that if she finds anything among her sisters belonging that might shed some light to her death she has to call him immediately. Felicia tells him that Martha kept a diary and she will look for it. She opens the door and a lot of people are there. Felicia tells detective that they are all vultures because they are pretending that they care but all they really want are the sordid details. Detective tells her that maybe they want to show their support. Felicia tells him that human beings feed on misery. Felicia thanks them all for coming here and expressing their genuine sorrow and disbelief for Martha, she would be so touched. Felicia tells them that she knows that they have questions but she just spoke to the police and they are still putting the pieces together but they do know is that Martha died a violent death because they found bruises and scratching on her body and several broken bones because there was a struggle and they found traces of dirt in her lungs which led them to believe that she was still alive at the time for her burial but the good news is that there are no signs that she has been molested. She tells people to go home now to their beloved ones. She starts going home but turns around and informs them that in lieu of a memorial service she will be holding an estate sale day after tomorrow and tells them that she won't accept personal checks.



"By the next morning everyone on Wisteria Lane was aware of Martha Huber's demise. With no exceptions (Lynette's kids are drawing dead Martha)."

Lynette tells them that she will give them gums if they promise to be quiet while she is downstairs playing poker. They promise that they will be quiet.

Bree wants to know what are the odds because first was Mary Alice and now Martha. Gabrielle tells them that this is different because someone was actually murdered on their street. Lynette tells them that she remembers talking to her right before she disappeared and she yelled at her for not bringing her garbage cans in. Edie is on the door and she surprise to see everyone there. Lynette tells her that Tuesday is a poker day and she tells them that she loves poker but nobody says a word. Edie tells them that since Felicia won't do anything to memorialize her sister she had decided to carry Martha's ashes to Torch Lake and scatter them there herself because that is where her husband proposed to her. Edie would like someone to go with her up there and she gives them the map and tells them to dress semi-formal. Gabrielle tells her that she returned back to modeling just for fun and she has a gig tomorrow. Lynette tells her that if she knew earlier she would have arranged a sitter and Bree tells her that she needs to take Rex to angiogram and they all look at Susan and Edie wants to know her excuse. Susan tells her that she is just busy and Edie tells her that her friends are all better liars and Edie goes away.

Lynette goes up to her kids and she is in shock to see Parker full of gum in his hair.

Lynette tries to take them off and it hurts. Parker wants to know if she is mad at him and she tells him that she is and she is also cranky because she wants to be the best mother and Parker tells her that he thinks that she is the best mommy in the world but Lynette simply gives up and she takes the machine to shave him completely.



Bree and George are having picnic at the park and Bree tells him that she was afraid that when she suggested it he will make fun of her but she simply loves it because it is an old fashioned way to spend an afternoon. George tells her that he is an old fashioned type of guy and takes her hand. She looks on her ring and then on her watch and tells him that his lunch hour at the pharmacy is up and he should go back. He wants to give her something. Bree opens the present and she is shocked and surprise but in a good way. He gave her 9-millimeter Luger P08. (A gun from a World War II) George tells her that from the moment she told him that she was in the NRA he knew he wanted to give it to her. Bree tells him that it is an antique and it is too valuable. He tells her that his grandfather got it when some soldier gave it to him in the Second World War. Bree wants to know if the handle is the mother of pearl and he tells her that it is and only the officer model had it. Bree tells him that she is absolutely delighted. Bree tells him that it is so much better then an orchid. He takes her hand and she hold onto it.



Susan approaches Felicia, who is bringing out bags with Martha's stuff in front of the house, and she tells her that she saw her from her house and she thought that she might need a little help. Felicia tells her that she can manage herself and Susan tells her that she must feel helpless not knowing who did it or why. Felicia tells her that her journals will provide some insight. Susan is surprised and Felicia tells her that she kept them for years and she had written every single detail of her life and everyone else's. She is holding them to herself because she won't allow some nasty family secret to go out in public.

Susan is out of her mind back home because everything about the fire and the measuring cup will be in the journal. Julie tells her to calm down and Susan asks her if there is a chance that she didn't put it in her journal and Julie tells her that it is a great dirt and she even put it in her journal. Julie tells her that she will have to come clean to Edie Britt but Susan tells her that she hates her and Julie tells her that she will have to suck up to Edie.



Mike is back home and he notices that somebody broke into his house. There is no money and the info about Wisteria Lane. He plays the message on the phone and it is Noah, the guy Mike saw with on the football field, and he tells him that he took his money and the little information he dig up about the neighborhood. He tells him to pack up and move on with his life because his replacement will need the house.



Lynette is with Penny and now bold Parker in the yoga center and she says to Lauren that she planned ahead and they are ten minutes early. Lauren sees Parker and tells her that she had no idea and asks her how long has it been. Lynette tells her that it just happened. Lauren tells her that it breaks her heart and Lynette then realizes what is going on and she wants to explain to Lauren that Parker does is not sick but Lauren tells her that she will find place for her kids and she can go ahead.



Susan approaches Edie and tells her that she envies her. Edie asks her why and Susan tells her that she gets to build her dream house for free and her house burning down was a good thing. Edie tells her that there is nothing good about it and she can't replace the memories the photographs and then asks Susan if there is something she wants. Susan tells her that she just wanted to see how she is holding up and Edie tells her that her best friends was murdered and stuffed into a garbage bag and nobody cares enough to go with her and spread the ashes and Susan tells her that she will go.



Gabrielle is back home with fried chicken for Carlos. He tells her that he is starving and she gives him the food and tells him that she is too tired to eat. Carlos takes her hand and she sits next to him. He starts massaging her shoulders and asks her if she stopped by the hospital to visit mama and she tells him that she worked ten hours today and besides she doesn't even know when she is there. Carlos tells her that she will wake up soon and he knows what will make her happy. Gabrielle tells him that she doesn't want to hear anymore about grandchildren because they agreed so. Carlos tells her that things change and she tells him that she knows because they took away her car and her husband is a felon and she is working again and she is well aware that things change. Gabrielle asks him who will change the diapers when he is in the prison. She tells him that she likes her lifea lot and she doesn't want him to kill it. Carlos tells her that it is already dead and she can't control everything. She tells him that she can control having a baby, she can control him. He tells her that she can't talk to him like that because he is still a man of the house. She takes fried chicken and walks out of the house. She reminds him not to go any further because he is on house arrest. He yells at her to get inside the house right now. She opens the fried chicken box and she starts eating on his own eyes and she tells him how delicious it is. She tells him that he is not the man of the house because he can't even leave it.



Bree and George are together on some farm to practice shooting. George is holding the bag and Bree is putting bottles on their positions. She tells him that he will never forget this night because firing a gun is like magic. He tells her that he can't describe to her what these few days had meant to him. Bree tells him that she had some fun too and he tells her that it meant more to him. Bree gives him some instructions. She goes over number one that is strong stance, number two, that is high hand grasp, number three, that is hard grip, number four, that is front sight, and number five, that is to release the safety and slowly squeeze the trigger.

He doesn't understand the rules and she tells gives him the gun and stand behind him. He puts his hand on the gun and tells him that when he is shooting semiautomatic he needs a web of his hand to be all the way up against the edge of the backstrap. Her face is next to his and he is distracted by her perfume. She tells him that he needs to hold a gun like he is holding a beautiful white dove, hold it hard so it can't escape but not to hard so he won't kill it. She tells him to take a deep breathe and slowly squeeze the trigger. He turns around to kiss her but she backed up and he lowered his gun and shot his foot.

Bree is in the hospital and she tells him that she is so sorry that he lost a toe. She tells him that the doctors tell her that it is the middle one so the balance won't be affected and tells him that this won't change his life at all. He tells her that he always dreamt that before he died he would get to kiss a truly beautiful woman. He finally got the chance and he ended up blowing off his toe. He tells her that these types of things always happen to him and he will get over it. He tells her that he won't understand the thing that when he got the chance to kiss her she pulled away from him. He wants to know why she did that and she tells him that she was caught by the surprise. He tells her that they are dating and there is nothing wrong in kissing. She tells him that she is still married to Rex and they are not legally separated yet. He tells her that she told him that she would hate him forever and she tells him that he shouldn't listen to a woman who just had her heart broken because they tend to lie. Bree leaves.



Lynette is already late and it is ten past ten. She is again with Penny and Parker.

"Lynette knew serious illness was not a matter to be treated lightly. (She takes Parker in his arms and takes of his hat) But making her yoga was a matter of life and death."

She goes to receptionist Lauren and tells her that they had a rough morning and Lauren tells her not to give another thought.



Susan is with Edie but she has tire flat and Susan is changing it. Edie tells her that she bets that she was a cheerleader in high school. Susan tells her that she was in her junior year and Edie tells her that girl like her are always cheerleader, clear skin, honor roll, popular. Edie tells her that in high school she was the girl who hung out with freaks on the loading dock and smoked and everyone hated them. Susan thanks God for leaving high school behind. Edie tells her that she is still the outsider that doesn't get invited to the cool parties and she is still a perky cheerleader that thinks she can pool wool over everyone's eyes. Edie tells her that she came on this trip, paid a gas and now she is changing a flat when she knows that she has autoclub. Edie knows that she wants something from her. Susan tells her that she knows that Martha's death has been hard on her and she wants to help. Edie tells her that that is a lie. Susan doesn't understand and Edie tells her that they are still in high school and old rules apply because cool kids only talk to the freaks when they need something and Edie tells her that she is not getting back to her car until she tells her the truth. Susan tells her that she never treated her well and she wants to make amends. Edie tells her that she still thinks that she is fool of crap but they don't have time for that right now. Susan tells her that she would have talked to her in high school and Edie tells her that that is the biggest lies of all.



Mike visits Noah and he offers him a seat and Mike tells him that he wants it all back his maps, pictures, his gun and money. Mike tells him that he will never find somebody who cares about finding Deirdre more then he does. Noah tells him that he abandoned her but loved her. He saved himself, found himself a nice wife and he left his daughter to rot and he needs to question his level of commitment. Mike pulls him up against the wall and tells him that he needs to do this and asks him why he is fighting him. Noah tells him that he is not moving fast enough and he is running out of time. Mike wants to know what he means and Noah tells him that he has a brain tumor and he wants to find out the truth before he dies.



Lynette finished her yoga and Lauren introduces her friend Callie. Callie tells Lynette that she survived the breast cancer and she wants to hug Parker. She tells him that he needs to be brave and hugs him. Parker looks at Lynette and asks her if he is dying. She tells him that he is not and people only think like that because she shaved his head. Callie is shocked when she hears that and Parker tells her that his brothers put bubble gum in his hair. Lynette starts going away.

"And just like that, Lynette realized the road to enlightenment and spiritual well-being was now closed to her."



Bree is taking care of some flowers and George visits her. He tells her that he had been thinking a lot in the hospital and he really needs to be with her and they can call it dating, hanging out or friendship but he really needs her. Bree tells him that that won't be wise. Bree asks him if he is hoping that in time she will grow up to feel the same about him as he is feeling the same about her. He is hoping. Bree is so sad and he tells her that he is so pathetic for even thinking that she could love him someday. Bree tells him that he is not pathetic but she just can't. George starts going away and she tells him not to go. She wants to talk this over and she grabs his shoulder and he falls down the steps with all his crutches. He screams at her to get away from her and he doesn't need her help, he doesn't need anyone's help.



Gabrielle tells Carlos that tonight is the last boat show and they can spent more time before she goes to the house and garden stuff. Carlos tells her that he is going to jail and she won't' be here. Gabrielle tells him that everything is going to be fine and he tells her that they could find him guilty on every charge. He could go to jail for five years and they would have to sell the house and she would have to keep on working. If that happens Carlos wants Gabrielle to promise him that she won't leave him. She promises and goes away.



Susan is with Edie on the lake and she is driving the boat. Edie tells her to stop and they stop. Edie opened the container and Susan asks her what she is waiting for. Edie tells her that she needs a moment and she starts crying. Edie tells her that she is so grateful and Susan tells her that she knows that Martha has been a good friend to her. Edie tells her that she is grateful to her because she has been such a bitch over the past few years and she is rowing her out to drop her ashes. Edie tells her that she stepped up when nobody else would and she was thinking that she had an ulterior motive. Edie tells her that she is such a good person and tells to herself that she is such a bitch. Susan tells her that she is not that bad and she is not that good. Edie is so grateful that she has a true friend and takes Susan's hand. Susan tells her that she burnt her house down. She tells her that she was scared that she was sleeping with Mike so she got inside and she snuck around and she started the fire by accident and she panicked and she didn't know what to do and asks for forgiveness. Edie dumps ashes all over Susan and tells her to row her back. Susan is in shock.



Mike apologizes to Noah for shoving him and he apologizes to Mike for questioning his commitment. Mike shows him the picture of him and Deirdre and tells him that he carries that around with him all the time to remind him why he is there. Noah tells her that if it turns out that someone hurt her he would want them dead. Mike tells him that they need to be sure and Noah tells him that when he is sure he knows that he can trust him. Noah tells him that he killed for her once.



Carlos is cleaning the house and Gabrielle goes off to work. He grabs the phone and calls the pharmacy and tells him that his wife lost the prescription and he orders the new pills for a couple of months ahead. They already came and Carlos opens the plastic and takes the birth control pills and puts the aspirin back and slowly tapes the plastic and it looks like nothing happened in the first place.



Edie and Susan are back home. Susan tells her that she doesn't have to forgive her and she can go to the police or kick her or burn her house down but she wants her to know that she is racked with guilt and it is not possible to her to suffer more then she is already suffering. Edie tells her that she would like to put that theory to the test. Susan goes out of the car and tells her that she is so sorry. Edie tells her that she won't go to the police and they will investigate and the insurance policy will delay her check. Edie tells her that there is one thing and she wants to be invited to the cool poker game. Edie tells her that she is not saying that she will go and she is not saying that her and little friends have to be nice to her but it would be nice to be invited. Susan tells her that they meet on Tuesdays and its potluck lunch and everyone has to bring something and Edie tells her that she won't bring her anything. Susan tells her that she is glad everything worked well and she needs to go to take a shower to take Martha off of her. Edie tells her that she can't stand the thought of Martha's ashes going down some sewer drain. Edie points out that Susan has a lovely lawn and Martha can rest here and have a view on Wisteria Lane. Edie tells her to stand on the lawn and she will hose her off. Susan tells her that she won't and Edie tells her that she owes her. Susan approaches and Edie tells Martha that she will miss her and she starts watering Susan.



"Death is inevitable (Felicia is looking on her sister missing paper) it's a promise made to each of us at birth. But before that promise is kept, we all hope something will happen to us (Felicia throws it in the garbage can). Whether it's the thrill of a romance (Carlos and Gabrielle are having sex) the joy of raising a family (Lynette is trying to have yoga at home but her boys won't leave her be) or the anguish of great lost (Mike looks at the picture of him and Deirdre). We all hope to experience something that make our lives meaningful (Noah looks at the picture of his daughter Deirdre). But the sad fact is not all lives have meaning, some people spend their time on this planet just sitting on the sidelines (George is playing a video and it is form a pharmacy camera and he is looking the video when he talked to Bree and he is at home just like watching a movie) waiting for something to happen to them before it's too late."