Terror Starts At Home
Written by Adam Barr
Directed by Jeff Melman
9.0
"Superb"
After not so subtly dropping the hint in "Children Will Listen" that she may be pregnant, Gabrielle's worlds turns upside down when she learns she's with child and where better a place to get your first indication than to hurl into a beautiful sports car at a car dealership. Naturally enough she's far from pleased and her various reactions to the bombshell with various people are nothing short of hilarious as Eva Longoria gets to flex her comedy skills to great effect. Before even being told, the fairly conservative Father Crowley had a brilliant look of dread and his attempts of morality talk were brilliantly wavered by the flippant mommy to be.
Better yet though was her telling Carlos during his "Going To Jail" (they'll celebrate anything in this crazy ass street) party when she finally copped on to him tampering with her birth control pills. For someone as wily as our Gabby it's always amazed me how it's taken her so long to deduce the obvious altering of her 99.9% effective sin and Carlos' obvious glee at his handiwork couldn't have been more present, even if Ricardo Antonio Chavira stretched his facial features even more than he did here. Now, the flip side is we're saddled with a whole "who's the daddy" thread as Gabby only fell preggers shortly after re-romping with John and my God, I really hope the writers don't stretch this thread out too long. Although the pregnancy plot is a hoot, especially with Gabby's barbs about her and Carlos making terrible parents, I did wonder if given her determination not to be with kid, would an abortion thread be inevitable. Probably not because 1: this show is on a network and 2: Gabby will definitely be double O screwed if she did. This plot also sees a nice supportive turn for Susan too.
After being bogged down in so many "woe is me" and other cringe worthy plots just of late, the dry spell of yawn worthy storylines may have lifted as I've finally started to care for Susan's plots yet again. Yes, the selfless, compassionate and determined woman we all cared for in the opening episodes has finally returned. Thanks to Edie, Paul cautions her out of snooping into his house while spinning obvious bullshit about Mary Alice when he's not telling Zach "he's not that special" (that's just as bad as Bree's "You're not getting into heaven because you're gay" spiel with Andrew last week). Then there's also Susan's hostility towards Zach, which I'm struggling to really seeing as she keeps harping on about Mary Alice being her best friend and all.
Zach himself is also going off the deep end too as his unstable behaviour gets cranked up a bit further and even though I don't blame her for wanting to break things off, I kind of wished Julie had handled Zach better than she did but no matter how brutal she was, Zach has now transformed into crazy stalker guy and is still outcreeping Daddy Darkest at the minute. As for Susan's kitchen catching fire, I think it's him even if the lighter thing could be a throw off.
Oh and there's some nice scenes with Susan and Mike as the former lovers sort of compare note on how dangerous Paul is. I was actually surprised with Mike's reaction to Susan investigating Paul, he really does care for her and I'm wondering if he knows more about the Young's than he's letting on. Of course Susan decides to continue snooping and enlists none other than PI Shaw to do the dirty work. As I've said before selfless Susan is more fun than the sickening heartbroken one we've been relegated to watch in recent weeks.
Some nasty surprises this week as creepy pharmacist George returns and guess what? He's pushing up the Bree devotion even more (him and Zach should really set up an Obsessive 101 club in Stalking) and rubbing Rex up the wrong way to stratospheric heights in the process. In the mostly oddly interesting mnage a trios, I found myself siding more with Rex here more than anyone else. I don't blame him for being territorial over his wife and I certainly enjoyed him pushing George into the pool at the Solis' party. Seven episodes ago, I felt a little sorry for George but he too has migrated into a jerk with his abysmal treatment of Ginger and easy manipulation of Bree. Her and Rex are back into old familiar shoes too which is a bummer and George having Bree see him without Rex's knowledge does equate to the same thing he did with Maisy, even if sex isn't involved. As for the situation with Andrew? I'm not entirely shocked it's been put on the backseat but with so few episodes left, let's hope it's not for long.
With all the brilliant plots for the housewives this week, it's Lynette's that is weakest one again. Tom's glamorous ex-girlfriend (who Lynette stole him from) has been working side by side with him for the past three months without her knowing. Given the history with Lynette/Tom/Annabel, it's not shocking Lynette feels threatened and while I've admired her knack for taking things head on, I'm pretty sure I wasn't the only one who felt she handled the situation badly. Sure, she only threatened to call into work everyday if Tom didn't transfer his ex and arranged a dinner complete with civilised hellions in order a happy home environment but just like with Rex, I felt embarrassed for Tom. Out of all the husbands, she's definitely been the luckiest of the bunch and while I'm not dismissing the possibility of Annabel being a threat, Lynette's constant paranoia and mistrust of him seems to be the thing she should worry for, though I do wonder if Annabel's reappearance is a factor in Tom's big, dark secret. Lighten up, woman. Oh and her "predator" conversation with Edie? Loved it. I've said it before and I'll say it again more interactions with Edie and the other housewives please?
Also in "Fear No More"
Opening sequence Susan with younger versions of Julie proving she is an accident prone with babies and Julie will probably end up brain damaged or similar to Sophie (who wasn't so annoying here, mainly because she didn't feature that much) in later life.
Father Crowley: "Gabrielle what brings you here? Oh sweet mother of God, what have you done now?"
Bree: "Honey do your hands still tremble when they touch me?"
Rex: "Ha, ha. No, but come on, we've been married eighteen years"
Bree: "Yes we have and you still don't know when I need you to lie to me".
Martha (re Mary Alice): "Are you saying she stole the baby?"
Felicia: "Don't look shocked, Martha. It makes your face look fat".
Mystery update In the Martha/Felicia flashback it appears that Zach/Dana is drug addled Deirdre's child who Mary Alice/Angela and Paul swiped as a baby. So we now know why and how Martha was able to blackmail her but not if she knew anything regarding Deirdre. I also wonder if Mike could be Zach's real father?
Zach throwing pebbles at Susan was a bit hilarious.
Edie (re Susan): "She thinks you're evil"
Paul: "Thank you".
I see Edie has also rehired Mike as her contractor again. His arrest was really the least talked about event on Wisteria Lane (bar Susan's whinging).
Edie: "When I feel threatened by a woman, I pull her in. I make her my best friend"
Lynette: "I thought you said you didn't have any female friends?"
Lynette's maiden name was Lindquist, Susan's was Bremmer, Bree's was Mason so now all we have to do is find out Gabrielle's. I'm assuming Edie's just is Britt.
The teaser I'm using for this episode is the title of one of my favourite Six Feet Under episodes which I found appropriate for the episode.
Paul (to Zach): "I think you're a wonderful kid, I do but you're not that special Zach, not really". And the Father Of The Year award doesn't go to
Bree (after her and George are pushed into the pool): "Rex have you lost your mind?"
Rex: "To be fair, I only pushed him".
Gabrielle: "Carlos you son of a bitch! I am pregnant and it's all your fault".
Eva Longoria looked very pale during parts of the episode. I wonder if she was actually sick while filming. If so, she proved to be a trooper by pulling such a blinding performance.
What a blinder. A hell of a knuckle cracker filled with plenty of shock and horror moments, "Fear No More" was filled with delight through and through. There are way too many excellent moments to really describe but overall, Adam Barr made an impressive debut and with all the set ups for the final three intact, things are getting hotter than a heatwave in hell. Wonderful.
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