Carlos: Edie, what are we doing here?
Edie: Checking out a house.
Carlos: I told you, I'm not looking to buy right now.
Edie: Well, who's talking about buying anything? I... am giving it away.
Carlos: Edie, we cannot have sex in here. It's someone else's bed! That's just wrong!
Edie: Look, we can't use my place. And we can't use yours. But I'll be damned if I am gonna pay for a hotel room when there are all of these empty houses all over town that I have the keys to.
Mary Alice: (narrating) Though reluctant at first, Carlos soon saw the wisdom in Edie's plan. Secret affairs are a lot like real estate. The three keys to success are location... location... location.