Rumours
Written by John Pardee And Joey Murphy
Directed by Wendy Stanzler
9.0
"Superb"
Now here lies an episode with a rather simple message that doesn’t really warrant too much depth but at the same time is as effective as hell. The message is that gossip is an everyday part of life and hey, can you name one person of the top of your head that doesn’t indulge in the slightest bit of gossip every now and then because I certainly can’t.
The main piece of scandal circling Wisteria Lane like wildfire is the now exposed revelation of Karen McClusky hiding her husband in the freezer and when it comes to something like that, you’re hardly inclined to ignore it and Karen has to suffer being the talk of the neighbourhood for this week.
Mainly it’s just people talking about it on the street or the likes of Lynette, Susan and Gabrielle making some pretty obvious quips about Karen’s freezer but out of everyone, I kinda expected more from Lynette as she is the only who has anything vaguely resembling a friendship with Karen and she didn’t seem all that interested in trying to understand why Karen did what she did.
Then again Lynette’s non interest isn’t quite as bad as having a group of kids using Karen’s door tossing eggs and writing graffiti and a good sign of knowing that Karen was defeated was the forlorn way she looked when she realised what people, especially were thinking of her.
So it’s nice that we at least get one person on Karen’s side and it’s even nicer that the person who defends her honour happens to be Parker. I didn’t really think it was him who ratted her out last week and due to Ida’s scatty manner, I still really don’t. Then again I could wrong and Parker could be helping her out of guilt but even if that is the case, at least there’s someone willing to help Karen out.
Also Parker thinks it’s a smart idea for Karen to tell everyone her side of the story which is more than fair but I echoed Karen’s sentiment when she accurately pointed out that people would be less interested in hearing her side of the story. The annoying thing about gossip is that it turns people into fantasists who hold no time or interest for fact or reality.
However when another incident of vandalism occurs on Karen’s property and Parker is pissed at her during Travers birthday, Karen finally does what the young lad suggested and gathers enough people around to explain what really happened and suffice to say, it’s more mundane than the gossip would like you to believe.
So Gilbert died and because he hadn’t changed his will and Karen didn’t fancy being left nothing she decided to store his body in the freezer. Okay that still isn’t really normal and those of you hoping for a big murder mystery as probably disappointed but if it means that Kathryn Joosten is sticking around then I’m as pleased as punch about that. Her scenes with the Scavos are always a joy to watch.
As for the Scavos, this is one of those episode in which neither party is in the wrong and where sympathy can be conveyed for both of them and given the fact that the last few episodes have made Tom sympathetic one week and Lynette the other, having one where you feel bad for both of them is a relief.
I think everyone knew that opening that restaurant was going to be the cause of problems for Tom and Lynette and even more so when Lynette made the foolish error of ditching her own career to work with Tom. It more or less had disaster written all over it.
And it hadn’t taken the writers long to prove us right. Since there’s they’ve had conflicts over liquor licences, employees, uniforms, chairs and now Rick and his new dishes are becoming the wedge between the always quarrelling couple and it’s all thanks to Kayla.
Not only is the little madam a prized brat of the highest order but her burning hatred for Lynette fuels her latest attempts to turn her father against his wife. However it isn’t a case of Kayla making things up in order to create conflict but Kayla using her knowledge of Lynette and Rick’s behaviour with each other to rouse Tom’s suspicions.
Lynette and Rick aren’t exactly going to win awards for discretion as not only Kayla openly question her stepmother about why she works so late but delights in informing Lynette that she’s able to tell when she lies and if I were Lynette, I would be worried because vindictive or not, Kayla is a smart kid.
Lynette’s entire attitude around Rick can be seen by everyone around her. Staying late is one thing but the flirting and trying to sneak off to meet his friends as well? Even if Lynette has the will power not to have any sexual contact with Rick, this still has all the trappings of an emotional affair in the same vein of Bree/George in late Season One, which Edie pointed out succinctly.
Lynette also drew further suspicion when she wouldn’t let Tom go back to work and deliberately stopped him from firing Rick as well. How can those actions not speak some volumes? I really don’t want another affair plot on the series but like some open minded pointed out, this one could be good and even better if it’s Lynette doing the cheating rather than Tom. That being said the old adultery is something we’ve been given every season so maybe it’s a bit redundant too.
Something however that will always be redundant is Gabby’s never ending self-entitlement and once again she takes it a bit too far after she managed to weasel from Edie that she and Carlos are an item.
You’d think that for someone who has long since been trying to get Carlos out of her hair that Gabrielle would be happy for her ex-husband but no, Gabby would much rather start a foolish campaign against Edie which only proves this woman has the mental age of a five year old.
I might be in a minority but despite great chemistry between Eva Longoria and Ricardo Antonio Chavira, I actually don’t Gabby and Carlos to get back together mainly because Carlos has matured without Gabby and Gabby never really appreciated him when they were married.
Also I find it laughable that Gabby can get engaged to a man she’s barely known for a month, yet Carlos isn’t allowed to date other people months after becoming a divorcee. Gabby had a point about Edie going for cast off but seeing as Edie started dating Carlos out of genuine interest and not for spite purposes, I can’t bemoan her too much.
I liked that at Travers birthday party; Carlos pulled Gabby aside and knocked on her head about her attitude. It’s things like this that make me respect Carlos more than I could ever with Gabrielle but damn Mary Alice for stating that Gabby’s reasons for letting Carlos and Edie is down to her knowing that Carlos still loves her. How patronising is that?
Edie also deserve points for using dirty tactics against Gabby when she was being ignored by the other housewives so thanks to Edie, Susan managed to get people interested in her book and Lynette got business for the pizzeria. Susan and Lynette’s reactions to not getting caught by Gabby were a riot but I find it hard to believe that Lynette would ever be afraid of Gabby. The other way around sure but not that way, not for one second!
Love plots remain the beast of the other housewives plot and after weeks of frustration and being yanked like a wishbone, Susan finally flips and given that she’s not the paragon of mental sanity, it comes as little surprise that during her “all men are bastards” mantra she defends Edie in a discussion with Lynette and Gabrielle and assaults some random bloke over parking space.
The latter stunt has her sent to a shrink and despite some very staged crying from Teri Hatcher, Susan finally comes to the mind numbingly obvious conclusion that she has to choose between Mike and Ian and after the latest pissing contest between the two of them, it seems that choosing neither is a viable option.
So Susan chooses Ian and they start making plans until self-awareness (and the help of listening to his fiancée listening to a message from her ex) hits Ian like a thunderbolt and while he realises that Susan loves him, he also knows that she loves Mike even more and so he dumps her. It’s a very maturely written and tenderly acted scene that might make me miss Dougray Scott but it more or less confirmed that Ian never really stood a chance of lasting.
As for Mike, just when Susan becomes available he decides to take off and give his house to Carlos because he’s devastated. More like because the plot demands yet more obstacles between Susan and Mike and a contrived way of having someone like Ida go on about Mike like he’s a saint. As we’ve seen from this episode, Mike is also capable of being a jackass but at the end of the day, he is the one that Susan really loves and when she gets him, I’d appreciate a change in tack for their plotlines.
Also in “Gossip”
Housewife of the week: It’s Nearly Kill Gabby week as she dodges a series of near accidents before reacting to Edie banging Carlos by smashing a glass in her hand.
Lynette (re Karen and Gilbert): “If you wanna keep your husband on ice, at least you get a dedicated freezer”.
Was it me or did Felicity Huffman look absolutely stunning in this episode? The writers seem to be bringing out Lynette’s inner sex kitten.
Edie: “You’re engaged to someone else, why do you care?”
Gabrielle: “It’s awkward”.
Rick: “Inventory?”
Lynette: “I know I’m a horrible person, I choose Ravioli over motherhood”.
Anyone else find the close ups on mouths during the gossip scenes a tad creepy? It was different but still creepy.
Susan: “Of course we’re with you”
Lynette: “We will give Edie the cold shoulder”
Gabrielle: “Not cold, frozen! I want icicles on that **** ears”.
Bree was finally mentioned this week and I have to admit I missed her during the “let’s boycott Edie” meeting.
Susan: “I wished she’d hurry, I’m terrified of snakes”
Lynette: “I’m more terrified of Gabby”.
Can we please have a storyline revolving around Susan’s writing career next season?
Karen: “Who would like to hear the gruesome details?”
Edie: “I would”.
Susan: “I’m sorry”
Mike: “At least I have my memories”.
I spotted Jordana Geist from Season One in this episode. Maybe one day we’ll get Maisy Gibbons back too! Ian: “You do realise we’re gonna be great together”
Susan: “I know”.
No Bree/Orson/Andrew/Danielle yet again, although not too long to wait now.
Susan: “I love you”
Ian (re Mike): “I know you do but you love him a little bit more”.
Karen: “I’m gonna need a raise”
Lynette: “Okay”. Chronology: Six weeks since “Dress Big”.
“Gossip” provides the lively debate of how rumours can very much damage a many of the characters suffer from the scrutiny they are put under this week. With only three episodes left, this season’s greatness isn’t diminishing anytime soon.