Desperate Housewives

Bree finds out just how shady a lawyer Karl is when he suggests she rob her own house to hide her assets from Orson. Bree being Bree, she goes about the process very neatly, but Karl encourages her to smash and grab, like a real burglar would. We smell a new pairing when Karl tells Bree she looks hot in black. Orson is shocked to see the house has been looted, and immediately insists it wasn't him.



Jackson makes Susan promise not to tell anyone that their upcoming wedding is a sham, not even Mike. Katherine is thrilled to hear that Susan's moved on, but we're not so sure that Mike has! There's one silver lining for him: Susan's marriage means no more alimony payments. But Susan's been counting on that money and tells Jackson the wedding is off.



Tom feels like a "dinosaur" in his job hunt. He's inspired by a friend who confesses the secret of his youthful appearance: He's had a facelift! Lynette brings home a coworker with a botched facelift to convince Tom to give up the idea, but Tom is undeterred. She recalls all the incidents that gave him the lines on his face and says, "It's like a map of our marriage, and I don't want to lose it," and that does the trick.



Mike casually proposes to Katherine. She's thrilled, until she realizes he's staring at Susan and Jackson. Susan tries to talk Mike into keeping up the alimony payments and ends up confessing the whole scam to Katherine. Realizing her own wedding depends on Susan's, Katherine blurts out, "You have to!" and offers to talk to Mike. Dave overhears the whole conversation, which couldn't be more convenient: He's been looking for a way to stop Jackson from i.d.'ing him as the nightclub arsonist.



Susan gets a text that reads, "I'll keep paying the alimony, Mike." But guess what, the message isn't from Mike, it's from Katherine. Susan and Jackson are on their way to get married, when two immigration officials arrest him. Bad news for Jackson but Dave couldn't be happier.



Bree is usually so prepared, but she's foolishly rented the storage unit in her own name. The jig is up when the company calls and Orson answers her cell phone. We have no idea what he'll do now, and are a bit afraid to find out.