Desperate Housewives

Season 3 Episode 11

No Fits, No Fights, No Feuds

Aired Sunday 9:00 PM Jan 07, 2007 on ABC



  • Trivia

    • Orson apparently likes redheads. Bree Van De Kamp, Alma Hodge, and Monique Polier, the women he is romantically connected with, all have red hair.

    • Susan says she loves Ian for the first time.

    • The beginning clip after the introduction shows the neighbour. This clip of the neighbour however is from Season 2. As in Season 2, Susan is living at Bree's house because her house was burnt down and this was the only time Susan would park her car in Bree's driveway. Yet in the clip of the neighbour you can see Susan's Volvo XC70 parked behind Bree's Chrysler 300C in Bree's driveway. You can also see Paul Young's SUV parked in his driveway next door to Bree's, however he is in prison and his old house is currently vacant, meaning that there shouldn't be any car in the driveway at all.

    • This is the first episode featuring Paul Young (Mark Moses) since the season two finale.

  • Quotes

    • Susan: Did you seriously think I could sit on information that would exonerate Mike? If you had seen his face in jail the other day.
      Ian: The other day? You saw Mike?
      Susan: Yeah, just to tell him about the lawyer. (turning to Bree) I know that Mike is innocent.
      Bree: Right, just like you knew Alma was dead.
      Ian: I thought we had an agreement.
      Susan: We do. Can we talk about this later?
      Susan: When? After your next conjugal visit?
      Bree: (to Susan) Boy, when it comes to Mike there's no one you won't betray.

    • Mike: I can't believe that I just listened to all that stuff Edie told me about you. It turns out you're the only one standing by me. You're a good friend, Susan.
      Susan: Ahm, yeah, about that. It's Ian. He's not crazy about me spending time with my ex.
      Mike: Even an ex who doesn't remember dating you?
      Susan: I remember, and I guess that's enough for him. I'm sorry.
      Mike: Well, I can't say that I blame him.
      Susan: (reaching out her hand to him) Take care of yourself Míke.
      Mike: You too, Susan.

    • Susan: I'm out of lipstick. Can I borrow yours?
      Julie: Sure. (hands her her lipstick)
      Susan: Cherry berry?
      Julie: Austin likes the way it tastes.
      Susan: Oh, I so did not need to know that.

    • Tom: She threw your doll in the trash?
      Lynette: No, first she ripped off its arms, stuffed it with chili, then she threw it in the trash!

    • (Carlos calls while Gabrielle picnics on the lawn with Bill)
      Carlos: Hey, hey, who's the dork?
      Gabrielle: Carlos?
      Carlos: What's with that cap? Extra! Extra! Read all about it!
      Gabrielle: Where the hell are you?
      (She looks around her and sees Carlos on Mike's frontporch, watching them as he drinks a beer. He waves at her)
      Gabrielle: What are you doing at Mike's house?
      Carlos: I live here.
      Gabrielle: What do you mean you live there? Since when?
      Carlos: Gabby, my car's been in the driveway for three weeks. Even you can't be that self-absorbed.
      Gabrielle: Well, as you can see, I have more pleasant things to focus on.
      Carlos: So when you gonna tell Jimmy Olsen there that you hate picnics?
      Gabrielle: I'm gonna hang up now.

    • Kayla: (to Lynette)Leave me alone! You're not my mommy!

    • Danielle: You hold on to your virginity. If Austin won't wait then he doesn't deserve you.
      Julie: I just don't want to lose him.
      Danielle: It's better than losing your self respect. Take it from a girl who's known at school as 'Little Miss Van De Tramp'.
      Julie: I thought you made that up?
      Danielle: Only because it was nicer than the other names they were calling me.

    • Carlos: Why would I send you flowers?
      Gabrielle: To sabotage my new relationship! (nods to Bill)
      Carlos: Oh, picnic boy? What do I care if you go out with him?

    • Carlos: (to Gabrielle) Gabby if I was gonna send you flowers I wouldn't send pink roses, I'd send you white orchids, because I know they're your favorite, and if I wanted to cheer you up… sunflowers, and for the flu, blue irises.

    • Bree: Now that we're all assembled I'd like to introduce the guest of honor. I hope you'll all be as delighted to meet her as I was. You can come in now.
      (Alma enters.)
      Bree: Everyone, this is Alma Hodge, Orson's first wife.
      (The ladies stare at Bree, then at Alma.)
      Bree: (to Susan) Oh, about that apology, anytime you're ready.

    • Florist: (to Gabrielle) What's to explain? A pretty girl gets flowers… do you know many girls never get flowers. I work in a flower shop, I've never got any freaking flowers, so stop your whining about who sent them and just be glad… he did.

    • Edie: I think Wisteria Lane is the place for you.
      Alma: Good. More than anything I just wanna fit in.
      Mary Alice: (narrating) Oh you will, Alma. You absolutely will.

    • Lynette: Well, gotta hand it to her. Just when you think Bree's thrown every conceivable theme party she hosts a Shame on you for thinking my husband killed someone dinner.

    • Andrew: Austin's not gay. Not even after three beers...Don't ask.

    • Alma: Bree Hodge? I'm Alma Hodge. I believe we have someone in common.

    • Alma: (to Orson) So, what is it with you and redheads?

    • Tom: I don't want you to be afraid to take a firm hand with Kayla. She is part of our family now and.. you know what that means.
      Lynette: Yeah! I should treat her as badly as I treat my own children.

  • Notes

    • International Episode Titles:
      Czech Republic: Žádné slzy, žádné spory, žádné sváry (No Tears, No Disputes, No Feuds)
      Slovakia: Keď dohody neplatia (When Agreements Do Not Apply)

    • Rachel Fox and Mark Moses submitted this episode for consideration in the category of "Outstanding Guest Actress in a Comedy Series" and "Outstanding Guest Actor in a Comedy Series" on their respective behalves for the 2007 Emmy Awards.

    • Dixie Carter receives the "and" credit as a guest star in this episode. However, she appears only briefly in the introduction and has no lines in this episode.

    • Marcia Cross is shown at a very high level throughout the episode to hide the fact that she was pregnant at the time they were filming the episode. You don't see much below her head & shoulders.

  • Allusions

    • Episode Title: "No Fits, No Fights, No Feuds" is a line from the song "Together, Wherever We Go" from the 1959 Stephen Sondheim and Jule Styne musical "Gypsy."