No More Secrets
Written by Marc Cherry
Directed by Larry Shaw
9.0
"Superb"
Bree: "Why must old ladies always do that?"
Orson: "I don't know but you've got to stop roughing them up".
With so many shows that I have been reviewing since "Getting Married Today" ended the third season and with the amount of things I'm going to be reviewing along with this show (mainly Nip/Tuck and Torchwood), this show will have to fight for my affections. Just kidding, because if this episode is anything to go by, then we're in for another terrific season.
Last time Edie was seen, she was dangling from her ceiling in a dramatic fashion. Some people take rejection pretty hard. On this show, some people just go insane over the idea of being dumped, even when it's their fault for being cast aside in the first place to begin with.
However for those of you, who are thinking that Edie might be sharing narration duties with Mary Alice, think again. Not only does she survive but it's revealed that she never actually intended to kill herself at all. She was so determined to hold to Carlos that making it look like she was about to end it would keep by her side.
Taking a moment to suspend disbelief, pretending to commit suicide to avoid being single is as big an overreaction, even on this show. The funny thing is that Edie's ludicrous plan actually works. Then again, Carlos is a man and on Wisteria Lane, they can amazingly stupid especially when the script demands them to be.
Edie pretending to be suicidal really came at a worse time for Carlos. Now that he's actually succeeded in getting back with Gabrielle (without even having to try I might add), the lovebirds want to run away together. Edie's well and truly put a spanner in the works when Carlos tells Gabby that they won't skip town anytime soon.
Gabrielle being the spoiled madam that she's always been isn't delighted with the change of plan. It seems that Gabby can't just go to Victor, call him up on that little conversation he had with Milton and tell him that she wants a divorce. Nope, that would be too sensible for Gabby.
Instead she just whines about how much she wants to leave him and gets pissed at Victor when he tries to get her to sell her house. With that arousing suspicion, Gabby spins some crap in order to placate her new hubby. She does to her credit later talk about her feelings with Victor when she's not enjoyable secret romps with Carlos and virtually bragging about stealing him from Edie.
Carlos might like to play with fire but he should realise that Gabby isn't the only woman who can his life a living hell if she's crossed. If Edie was able to torch Susan's house to the ground because of her sleeping with Karl, you can only wonder what she'll do when she finds out about Gabby.
The fact that she's also aware of Carlos' secret bank account and suggestively holds this knowledge over is telling. Actually the way she conveys the knowledge makes her sound a right bunny boiler. It's good job that Carlos doesn't happen to own any pets when you think about it.
I'm not really sure how I feel about this triangle besides wanting Carlos and Edie to end. I know Gabby and Carlos have all this chemistry but I've never felt that she actually loved Carlos and the writers are going to have to convince me in order for this plot to work for me.
Speaking of convincing, when it comes to doing extremes, Bree easily gives Edie a run for her money. Faking a pregnancy just so the neighbours don't look down on skanky Danielle is out there, even for Bree. Not that she cares because in the world of Bree, she's justified in her ridiculous scheme and her neighbours are dense enough to believe her.
Both Andrew and Orson attempt to make reasonable arguments as to why Bree should ditch the charade, but the silly woman won't listen to them. Instead when Mrs Cleaver tries to touch her belly, Bree nearly breaks the woman's hand. For all the craziness of that scene, there's a pointed comment from Bree of as to why people feel the urge to touch a pregnant woman's belly.
However the best disaster is the barbeque party when Ida sees Bree with a fork stuck on her belly and rushes to get Adam to see her. Now there are plenty of ways to attempt to divert attention from this but Orson pretending the fork was retractable and Bree playing along is inspired silliness at its best.
The thing is though is that Orson raises a good point. Bree's charade can't be maintained and her behaviour will definitely arouse the suspicion of the wrong person if she isn't careful. Her reasons for wanting to go through with the fake pregnancy make sense in her mind. She feels she's failed as a mum to both Andrew and Danielle but taking Danielle's baby and raising it as her own so she can have her second chance reeks of selfishness now matter what way you see it. It would be more in Bree's best interests to repair the relationships she has with Danielle, rather than potentially wreck another.
Children are definitely a big theme in the season premiere as even Susan has to contend with them. Okay Julie is still the dream kid but now that her and Mike are married, the likelihood of them procreating was always going to be there. Mike's totally happy and Susan's freaked out because she thinks their marriage is going to fail. Luckily for everyone else concerned, Teri Hatcher doesn't go overkill on the melodrama.
An appointment with OBGYN Adam ends up with Susan being grossed out by having her new neighbour examine her and then panicking when she thinks she has the menopause. Maybe I wasn't hearing properly but did Adam actually say the word 'menopause'? It felt to me that will all of her hysteria, Susan just thought it and left before Adam could confirm or deny the prognosis.
Even funnier though is Susan attempting to convey that piece of information to Mike. Mike is as supportive as he can be but Susan is still confused about his real feelings until Adam confirms that she's pregnant and not menopausal. With all of the other wives having problems it's nice that Susan and Mike are in a good place.
Better yet is Susan's reaction to being pregnant. It's not a secret that Mike is clamouring to be a father but Susan was adamant at first to not wanting another child. Here she seems content with the idea. I'm sure her and Mike will have some difficulties as they get used to being married but it's nice to actually bask in their happiness for a change.
More pointedly, someone who isn't having the happiness she deserves is Lynette. Having cancer is definitely taking its toll on her. She doesn't want the kids to know, she's concealing it from her friends and even a pushy PTA mom, who's making it her business to be as annoying as they come.
Seeing as Lynette hasn't been seen in the PTA since Season One, this mum brings an unwelcome reminder of Maisy Gibbons from "Running To Stand Still". Attending your kid's play and having some snotty bint with nothing better to do than moan is more than any of the other wives would've tolerated. I'm amazed that Lynette didn't sucker punch her during that play.
Instead she waits for the pushy mum to try and embarrass her at the barbeque. Lynette royally shuts the woman up by pulling off her wig and revealing her cancer to the whole of Wisteria Lane. Well this is virtually soap, so it's not exactly inconsistent within the genre. Still the reveal does manage to be very affecting.
Also affecting is the scene with the other wives and Lynette. They all express their feelings about being kept out of the loop and Lynette's reason for this are way more justified than Bree's for wanting to fake a pregnancy. I love it when this show does scenes like this because they always come across as being so naturalistic even if the wives' vow to keep no more secrets is unlikely to last. It also helps that both Tom and Stella show their support to Lynette as well in this episode. Tom even offered to deal with the PTA mom.
Secrets though are the foundation of this show and Season Four's mystery strolls in with the arrival of Katherine Mayfair, husband Adam and daughter Dylan. I'll point out that Adam isn't Dylan's father but Katherine is related to Mrs Simm who was mentioned in "What Would We Do Without You".
A better connection however would be the fact that Katherine was in Wisteria Lane until 1995 and happened to be friends with Susan. Karen McClusky also knew the woman and Julie and Dylan were virtually sisters during that time. Katherine makes an instant impression as she manages to be both charming, mysterious and infuriating in one go. All praise to Dana Delaney for her portrayal.
Katherine not only makes an impression on her neighbours but she also makes an enemy of Bree. Because the woman are so alike (red hair, prudish, dark), there's an instant clash and one that I expect will form the basis of many a good scene throughout the season.
Why Katherine is back in Wisteria Lane though is another thing. She claims it's because Mrs Sims is in bad health but the way her and Adam are acting creepy over one room in their house (formerly the bachelor pad of Mike and Carlos) and the fact Dylan is virtually a different girl, according to Julie would suggest otherwise. Adam comes across as being a bit skeevy so maybe he's the reason behind their return.
Also in "Now You Know"
Keeping up with the tradition of previous season openers, there's only the Apple logo for this episode.
Gabrielle (to Carlos): "Running away on my wedding day was crazy but running away to be alone is insane".
I liked that all the women gathered at the hospital to see Edie but I can see anger when they find out she faked it. Does Edie genuinely like any of the women?
Susan: "So you've got everything you wanted?"
Mike: "Pretty much".
Gabrielle: "This was my home. I was very happy there"
Victor: "We've got a new home. Aren't you happy there?"
Have Susan and Gabrielle taken Mike and Victor's surnames, even in a double barrel top capacity?
Susan: "You haven't changed a bit"
Katherine: "Well you have. Your eyesight is going".
Adam: "Holy heaven, have we met?"
Susan: "Yes, Susan Mayer. I'm your new neighbour".
There was some controversy over dialogue that people thought discriminated people from the Philippines in this episode.
Lynette: "I'll buy you a new purse"
Stella: "That's good of you but that wasn't mine".
Mike (re the menopause): "It's a natural part of life"
Susan: "Yeah, before death!"
Eva Longoria is now credited it as Eva Longoria-Parker starting off with this episode.
Carlos (re Edie): "The woman tried to kill herself when I left her. She's no good with disappointments"
Gabrielle: "Well, neither am I".
Orson: "Let's go freak out Mrs McClusky"
Bree (to Ida): "He's such a scamp".
New Regulars this season are Dana Delaney and Lyndsey Fonseca while Nathan Fillion is a recurring character. I read somewhere that Dana Delaney turned down the role of Bree. It's great that she got hired to play Katherine though.
Orson: "So what you really want is a second chance?"
Bree: "Well, would that be so horrible?"
Lynette: "That's so rough. By the way I have cancer"
Muriel: "I'll give Helen a call".
Danielle was the only main character who was missing from this episode, though she did demand a DVD player off Bree. Lynette: "You with us?"
Bree: Absolutely. No more secrets".
This secret account is the one that Gabrielle discovered in "Children Will Listen", right? Damn, Carlos really is stupid when you think about it.
Edie: "I don't care about money, Carlos. I only care about you. That's why this relationship is going to work. You can trust me with your secrets, like I can trust you not to hurt me".
Adam: "Are you sure we should've moved back here?"
Katherine: "Did we ever have a choice?"
Chronology: A month since "Getting Married Today", so June 2007 then.
This show must have the luck of the devil because while Grey's Anatomy fourth season is getting trashed by viewers, Desperate Housewives is retaining their enthusiasm. "Now You Know" is a perfect set up episode that gives everyone a meaty. I can't wait to see what Katherine's mystery and how it unfolds over the course of the season.