Names
Written by Alexandria Cunningham
Directed by David Grossman
8.0
"Great"
Bree: "I have a name now".
Orson: "And luckily for you, it's not mine".
It's amazing what five years can do to a marriage. Bree and Orson started off being one of the best couples on this show and now thanks to this episode, their marriage is beginning to crack big time.
It doesn't take much to see what's been driving them apart though. Although Bree has conveniently forgotten about that time she helped cover up Andrew's hit and run she hasn't been as forgiving with Orson's attempt on Mike. Pointing out yet again that I do not condone what Orson did, it's still strange that Bree hasn't gotten past it.
Orson tried to repent for his sins by going to jail during the unseen five years and Bree kept her promise and took him back. Last week he showed some sadness at her dedication to her new profession and this week he's even more furious.
The first thing to get on Orson's goat is Bree's insistence on using her former surname Van De Kamp for her public persona and book. Although I can see why Orson wouldn't take to this particularly well, Bree's profession reasoning for the use of her former marriage name made some sense. I guess 'Hodge' doesn't really scream conservatism enough.
While Orson and Bree do argue about this, Bree ended up making it ten times worse by denying his existence during a radio interview. Again while Bree might have had a good technical excuse for that, I can see Orson's upset as well. The fact that she also openly admitted that she was ashamed of Orson's criminal record had to sting.
But here's the thing Orson has a criminal record because of her insistence that he turn himself in. Under normal circumstance, this would be a commendable action in Bree if it wasn't for the fact that it simply wasn't her place to decide whether Orson should pay for the crime. After all it was Mike's and Mike was perfectly happy to let it go.
The worst part of the episode however occurs when Bree makes Orson a promise to cook him a pot roast. It's predictable that Bree would end failing to deliver on that promise and while that is sort of bad, Orson's behaviour however is ten times worse than Bree's.
I mean making his wife cook him a pot roast during the middle of the night when she's about to drop is a bit below the belt. I haven't sympathised with Bree in quite a while but I felt for her there and it speaks negative volumes about Orson. I know there were some hints in the past about Orson's controlling behaviour (originally the writers had envisioned him as another run of the mill lunatic) but this felt like character assassination to me.
Without sounding like a geeky shipper (because I kinda hate that word), I do like Bree and Orson as a couple. Both Marcia Cross and Kyle McLachlan spark off brilliantly with each other and to be honest, I would kind like to see Bree 'have it all' or at least proof that you can be in a great relationship and pull off a rewarding career. Something like that after all should be more than just a pipe dream as far as I'm concerned.
However if Orson's behaviour is worrying, then Edie and Dave are also a cause for concern. The Edie of old would laugh off a casual insult or deliver one twice as lethal to the unwitting sap out to smite her. This Edie however decides she wants to pack her bags and leave Wisteria Lane even quicker than she returned.
Luckily for us, Dave is able to say the right words in getting Edie to stay put. Granted it means that he has to use that patronising motivational speaker voice of his but while the guy exudes creepiness and has his own motives, I for one do not want to see Edie leave the show again.
It's not that I think Nicolette Sheridan is the best actress or that Edie is the best character but she does add to the show in her own and some of the best dialogue does tend to be given to her from time to time. Plus it would be interesting to see if she can reconnect with the rest of the women or befriend Katherine at the very least.
As for Dave, I already mentioned the creepy factor but here not only does he seem to have an S&M (minus the leash) type of hold on Edie but the way he reads people is way too uncomfortable for my liking. I know he's a motivational speaker but his working was something that was more destructive than constructive.
He managed to get his own back on Karen by reading into the fact that she's lonely and talks to her cat, Toby like it's a person. Newsflash Dave a lot of non-lonely people also adopt a similar dynamic with animals but it doesn't take much to see he was right about Karen.
The reason why Karen suddenly came into Dave's orbit was down to her refusal to apologise to Edie. Now here I side with Karen but that's mainly because her insult though mean was actually funny. Besides Karen also reminded us that Edie was more than capable of delivering her own insults.
That being said Dave did go too far in getting his own way. He stole Karen's cat and offered to look for it if she promised to apologise to Edie. For a brief second you could see vulnerability in Karen and Edie as well as a moment where Edie exchanged some compassion for Karen.
However it wasn't all that surprising that when Toby was returned, Karen would automatically assume that Dave played his part in the cat being missing in the first place. The more interesting part is that it seems that it will be Karen and Katherine who'll get stuck into the Dave mystery.
Last season I could take or leave Katherine but ever since she became Bree's disgruntled partner in the catering business, she's become less annoying. Karen's always been a fun character to watch and it's nice that she's being given more solid material to work with in the last two seasons. Hopefully this doesn't spell her leaving the show anytime soon though.
Meanwhile when it comes to utterly daft schemes to get to know your children, Lynette manages to be such a pro that Tom ends up looking like the rational one. When Lynette meddles, her heart usually tends to be in the right place but it doesn't excuse her stupidity with this episode.
Focusing on one of the twins instead the both of them is a good idea though. Personally I've never really cared for Porter but I did like him in this episode when it was revealed that he had a thing for poetry and wasn't as bland as he came across in the last episode.
Lynette decides to spy on her son by logging onto a social network and pretending to be a girl just so she can find out what goes on in that head of his. Tom told her it was a bad idea (as well as a massive invasion of privacy) but Lynette still went ahead and did it.
Of course there was no way she was going to get away and when she had to 'dump' Porter after he confessed that he was falling in love with her alias, she made the mother of all mistakes. Needless to say Porter caught her, refused to speak and there was a nice moment where he admitted (out of earshot) that he enjoyed being honest with his mother.
Speaking of honesty, Susan's attempts of hiding Jackson are still going arseways but after she admitted to Mike last week that she was seeing someone, what the hell did she expect? Granted the ways in Mike, MJ and Karl both met Jackson were a little cheesy but this is still a fun plot.
I mean Jackson's a nice guy and while he and Susan are doomed, I like that he's able to get on with Mike and that Karl didn't make him want to run for the hills. Even pairing him with Mike as a potential friendship was a nice touch as it got Susan to look at some of her issues with her ex-husband.
As for Gabby, the poor thing still fails to look authentically frumpy in each passing episode but for the second week in a row, I'm still interested in her ongoing storyline. For someone as gloriously materialistic as Gabby, having to play poor wife and mother does feel like a comedown.
With Carlos now as a masseuse (I like that character development by the way); Gabby went into overdrive trying to reclaim her social status. First she made sure that Carlos took the job at the country club and then she gate crashed a party that Bree had to tell that she was uninvited to.
Of course rejection is something that Gabby never took well to so it was funny to watch her and Carlos sneaks into the do. I almost didn't feel like scolding when Gabby fooled Carlos into thinking he was being photographed as well. However I did hate the way that Bree was unsympathetic to Gabby's plight. At least Carlos actually stepped up to the plate with that whole 'rich people are miserable too' spiel.
Also in "We're So Happy, You're So Happy"
The Previously On bit came back with clips from "Free" and "You're Gonna Love Tomorrow".
Jackson: "Wow, could this be any more awkward?"
Mike: "Well your robe's open so, yeah".
Mary Alice waxed about Jackson being a thoughtful boyfriend but he's got to have a skeleton or two in his closet, right?
Dave: "Adults don't pack up and leave because of good natured teasing".
Edie (re Karen): "She said that my breasts are a triumph of German engineering. Is that good natured teasing to you?"
Gabrielle: "Carlos I don't need to spend all the time with you and the kids are on the fence".
It seems that in five years time, MySpace, Bebo and Facebook will all be replaced with Silverfizz, which seems to be across between MySpace and MSN.
Karen (to Dave, re Edie): "I say she's easier to get into than a community college and she says my face looks like a knee. It's fun".
Lynette: "Porter sent me a sex poem".
Tom: "Why?"
Lynette: "He may be in love with me".
So Susan has a thing for earlobes (I get it) and Mike a thing for his toes. The latter reminded me of Gabe from Six Feet Under.
Tom: "Dear Porter, I really like you but I wanna see other offspring".
Lynette: "Go away".
Guy (to Susan): "Lady, what the hell are you doing with my beer?"
Mike: "We're not married anymore so I'm not protecting you".
Karl's appearance in this episode had something to do with an insurance document for Julie. Hope we see her soon.
Karl (to Susan): "Plumber and painter in the one house. Don't get dizzy climbing the social ladder".
Gabrielle: "That was Mrs Downing. How am I gonna fix this?"
Bree: "At this point, I'd run screaming into the night".
Of all the people who own a computer, why turn to Katherine? Is it because like Edie, she's also an outcast or it is because Katherine seemed a little interested in Dave?
Porter: "I wasn't telling you anything, I was telling her".
Lynette: "Okay for one thing, I loved our conversations and I'm going to miss them".
Porter: "Me too".
Bree: "Orson, I've been cooking all day. I'm so tired I can barely stand up. Do you really want me to make you a pot roast now?"
Orson: "You promised".
In this episode we met the new Parker but not Penny and Andrew only had at least one scene. I hope he gets a boyfriend this season.
Katherine: "Why would you bring me flowers?"
Karen: "Because you've got a computer and I need to find out about Edie's husband".
Chronology: A week or two since "You're Gonna Love Tomorrow".
Okay this was a little better than the premiere episode of the season. "We're So Happy, You're So Happy" was obviously a lie seeing as Bree and Orson are miserable with each other and Dave's a whack job waiting to happen but overall I'm actually convinced this five year leap is working.
Rating: 8 out of 10.moreless